The amount of ass-kissing on AL is not good enough for a transwoman who’s suffering from disapproval of actual lesbians on the sub

luckystar · 2020-09-09T06:54:52+00:00

Oh man I just came here to see if there was any discussion of this. Seriously the entire subreddit is largely dominated by trans people and they upvote memes about trans stuff pretty much daily. Even the slightest "I'm not attracted to male genitalia" will get an insta-ban for being violent transphobia. How much more could they possibly demand? Peak entitlement and self-centeredness

luckystar · 2020-08-23T06:20:18+00:00

TwoXChromosomes mods regularly reference this post

The name "XX" is not meant to be specifically inclusive or exclusive of anyone. Look around our submissions and you'll see that we already have some guys in our midst, and we welcome them openly, as well as anyone else who wishes to be here, no matter their genes. This subreddit is not "girls only", but rather, a place for discussion on "girly things". Here, we embrace fashion, makeup, things that smell nice, and honest discussion on matters that largely--but certainly not ONLY--concern women.

If you are a man with a secret love of chick flicks and shoes, you're welcome here.

If your body is male but your mind is female, you're welcome here.

If you tell us to make you a sandwich, you're welcome here, but will be downvoted into oblivion.

If you offer to make us a sandwich, you're more than welcome here.

And if you're a woman who hates chick flicks and shoes, you're welcome here, though if you also abhor everything else girly I doubt we'll have much for you here.

So yeah, it was never a subreddit for women. Just a subreddit for "girly things" like "chick flicks and shoes".

luckystar · 2020-07-19T00:32:11+00:00

Lol that account is a fucking trip. It's just her screaming into the void about TrAnSpHoBiA. Bitch nobody is afraid of you they just dgaf to remember what fake name or pronouns you made up this week. Pinned is her pics and she's a white girl with blue hair lol. I swear "enby"s are just white people who want to feel oppressed.

luckystar · 2020-07-27T21:40:22+00:00

Yeah, we actually have a ton of people who were harmed by Lupron used for precocious puberty, endometriosis and other conditions.

The other thing is that the blockers can't be taken indefinitely, it's just used to "kick the can down the road" for a few years. These kids end up taking cross sex hormones at 13~16, and they're permanently sterile (since they never develop the gametes their body was going to produce naturally). It still boils down to chemically castrating children.

luckystar · 2020-08-09T04:36:30+00:00

I just consider myself GC/radfem leaning without being 100% on board with them. I have exceptions for -- and deep sympathies/genuine allyship to -- the people I would consider "truly trans" (rather than just fetishists, special snowflakes, cross dressers, anime nerds, etc).

I'm talking about the type of people who usually label themselves "Transsexuals", which I'm guessing is the kind of person your friend is. They transition (medically, to the extent possible for them) due to gender dysphoria: a diagnosable mental condition for which they got therapy and were told the best available treatment currently available is transition.

They generally try to live life quietly while being presenting as the opposite sex in casual social situations. They don't wave their genitals around locker rooms or try to barge into women's leagues of sports or anything else that would draw attention to the difference between them and a biological woman (or man if they're a trans man).

They know they are biologically different from their gender ID and that is in fact what makes them trans. Aside from the GD, they have a reasonably stable mental condition.
Some prominent examples would include Blaire White, Buck Angel, Rose of Dawn, Kalvin Garrah etc. I have friends like this too!

I have ZERO problems with these people. I know that means I'm not 100% on board with radfem ideology as you could argue they are reinforcing gender roles or that they are really biologically [fe]male and thus it is technically incorrect to refer to them as a "woman" or "man" as it may be. I think they're just a tiny minority of humans (like 0.3% of people or something), that are struggling with a serious mental condition the best way they know how. They aren't trying to take rights away from women, they're not a threat to me. Yeah maybe it'd be better if Blaire White didn't act like to be more of a woman you have to be a bimbo with big breasts that wears makeup daily, but tons of biological women act that way too, and true transsexuals are such a tiny portion of society I don't think they are the main influencer or creator of "gender stereotypes", rather they're just aping those stereotypes to make themselves feel better, which a ton of biological women do too sadly, and I'm not gonna be able to change any of that.

For me, as somebody that views herself as maybe 70-80% GC, I'm comfortable with this. I don't see a conflict between my GC views and my support and allyship to transsexual friends. Like I won't go around rubbing it in their faces "hey did you know you're not a real woman? chromosomes, bitch" because the benefit:cost ratio isn't worth it. Whereas I DO see the uwu girldick anime avatar creeps forcing themselves into women's locker rooms and sports as a genuine threat that needs to be fought against, and I will NEVER accept them as the "gender" they claim to be.

Really all you can do is be true to yourself.

luckystar · 2020-07-13T02:45:29+00:00

Saw one say BBC are TERFs today. Truly we are all TERFs 😂

luckystar · 2020-07-11T04:00:47+00:00

Buck Angel has said plenty of times that he knows what it's like to be a woman (seeing as he lived as one before) and he agrees that women's voices are being silenced. I really enjoyed listening to this interview : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ha4PI9-EkPs

luckystar · 2020-07-13T20:22:07+00:00

Egg-irl and related seriously should be shut down. I always found it cringey when people glamorized cutting, anorexia, and other mental illness. But at least back then it was known that that stuff was bad and "pro ana" would get you banned from platforms pretty quickly.

Now egg-irl is the "pro-ana" of trans, and yet they're being coddled and protected while the people saying "hold up, it's totally normal to like anime, you don't need to chemically castrate yourself" are the ones being insta-banned.

I found r/transDIY the other day, it's absolutely horrific. Between trans subreddits/twitter "confirming" and "validating" literally every gender related thought as "Yup, you're trans", places like "transDIY" teaching youths how to medicate themselves with drugs from the internet, and "informed consent" clinics that don't even require ONE mental assessment before handing out drugs like candy... it is absolutely insane to pretend we aren't barreling towards having droves of unhappy detransitioners in coming years, having permanently damaged their body and had that choice validated by society and the medical establishment. Terrifying.

luckystar · 2020-07-28T20:25:36+00:00

Mermaids is also the organization whose CEO had her son castrated (SRS) at 16 in Thailand because it was illegal in the UK. She also laughed about her son's micropenis in an interview...

luckystar · 2020-08-11T21:20:23+00:00

Literally just mass sterilization of gay and lesbian youth.

luckystar · 2020-09-13T20:16:41+00:00

TiMs gaslighting TiFs into thinking they're the oppressors is quite common actually: https://simplereceipts.wordpress.com/2018/12/05/original-callout-for-eli-erlick/ https://www.lipstickalley.com/threads/transwoman-activist-cherno-biko-confesses-to-raping-a-transman.1068515/

It's some of the most flagrant examples of how gender ideology is just a thinly veiled shield for blatant misogyny. Play around with words and suddenly men (transwomen) are the most oppressed and women (transmen) have to make themselves even smaller and focus even more on the poor feelings of these "oppressed" men

luckystar · 2020-07-29T19:53:51+00:00

The other day my husband seriously asked me why I don't wear clothing with cleavage in public, only around the house. Like he just had no idea that it could be dangerous at worst and unpleasant at best to go out in public dressed a certain way.

luckystar · 2020-09-12T17:31:41+00:00

Yeah, I'm kinda confused. This story has nothing to do with gender identity; it's a story about parents with Alzheimers, which is a tragic, if well-trod story.

I was waiting for something juicy like "My parents kept calling me their daughter" or "My parents accused me of being a stranger breaking into their house" or whatever but nope. This is just somebody blogging about their slightly atypical life and getting into the NY Times for it.

luckystar · 2020-08-30T02:26:41+00:00

I noticed it too. The front page has a pro trans post almost every single day. Ffs there was that trans woman saying Animal Crossing made him trans and everyone was applauding how Stunning and Brave he was

luckystar · 2020-07-28T02:55:37+00:00

There have been many reports of children as young as 16 getting double mastectomies, and a few discussing going as young as 13. Sources include at least 1 published scientific paper and lots of screenshots from a Facebook group for parents of "trans kids".

It's basically the West's version of breast ironing.

luckystar · 2020-08-05T18:08:12+00:00

They know deep down it's all bullshit. That's why they freak out if anything ever so slightly pokes a hole in the bubble of delusion. Normal people don't need "validation" to know who they are or to like themselves.

luckystar · 2020-08-28T05:00:29+00:00

The suicide point drives me crazy. AFAIK people with other major mental illnesses such as borderline and schizophrenia also have very high suicide attempt rates, should we blame society for that too? What happened to "It isn't your fault, he was fighting his own demons, there is nothing you could have done" which is what we say when anybody else commits suicide? Why are ONLY trans people allowed to use their poor mental health to emotionally blackmail the rest of society?

It's also absurd because if bullying or discrimination was the sole/primary cause of the suicides, then why aren't other marginalized groups committing suicide at similar rates?

luckystar · 2020-08-16T05:27:06+00:00

What is the actual rate of trans people? Like 0.5%? How can they make a space where they are so dominant and not feel like something is off? Are they not capable of self reflection?

luckystar · 2020-08-13T19:08:01+00:00

This is the twitter case, right? All of Silicon Valley has swallowed the gender ideology deep. It's already an environment that is heavily dominated by men -- autistic spectrum men, socially awkward men, men with a disproportionate amount of money and power, men that are a little too into anime. (I originally wrote all of those to say "people", until I realized I was guilty of the same brainwashing thing -- I'm not talking about shitty "people" here, I'm talking about shitty "men").

I've heard so many stories of rape, people ending up at sex parties without realizing it, men who are comfortable buying women, and stuff like that. SV Companies love trans women because they boost the male:female ratio without having to actually hire a woman. Even better, really, because everything here is about paying lip service to the oppression Olympics and the most oppressed women are men that claim to be women, natch.

I'm not at all surprised that a woman would be in such a state of cognitive dissonance over her ex husband acting male while claiming to be a female. The idea of challenging TWAW is simply a non option to them, they would view it as offensive and inappropriate as dropping an n-bomb. I've asked a few straight techbros if they'd date a trans woman and they get extremely visibly uncomfortable, swear up and down they would, but then say something vague and dodgy like "I am attracted to certain feminine traits that trans women are less likely to have" or something because just saying "no" would not be acceptable.

luckystar · 2020-08-23T23:29:36+00:00

I've been noticing this in general. Tons of middle aged dads coming out as trans women. Basically no middle aged moms doing the same. Why is it? Is it really just a fetish for the men (AGP)? Does childbirth make a woman kinda get a hint that biological sex does matter? Are there middle aged moms who want to go live as men but are socialized to put their family first so they don't get the idea of divorcing and running off and spending their entire income on hormones and surgeries?

luckystar · 2020-08-13T19:10:56+00:00

Just read it, this paragraph jumped out at me:

"Those of us who are partnered to trans people are used to this, to some degree. The trans person takes up all the space; they’re the ones people are interested in, who people go out of their way to validate or compliment or criticize. We disappear."

Hmm I wonder why

luckystar · 2020-08-11T17:52:44+00:00

I had an debate over this topic recently that was so wild. I gave some photos of Danielle Muscato (who actually did use a women's shelter), the Gamestop Ma'am, Yaniv, etc as examples of people who would make women in women's shelters feel unsafe and my friend agreed. But her suggestion was to have a separate space for trans women at women's shelters, so they are isolated from the women. So... basically sex segregated shelters again lol. I think most people deep down know this stuff is fucked up, but they've been conditioned with TWAW to the point where their brains kinda short fuse at the situations where there are obvious problems.

luckystar · 2020-08-13T18:57:15+00:00

I kept wanting this account to be fake (the description of the neovag sounds like a collection of "why srs is bad" cliches) but they have SO many photos on their account from a period of years that makes me think it all has to be real, and that is so heartbreaking. I hate how the trans community tries to sweep people like this under the rug.

luckystar · 2020-07-20T23:20:10+00:00

This is the kind of stuff that makes me actively angry. How can they not see how misogynistic they are?

luckystar · 2020-07-17T05:19:25+00:00

They get pretty honest later on in the video. Honestly I was shocked at how they were openly referring to MTF middle aged perverts as men, it felt so sanity restoring! I'm so used to holding my tongue and forcing myself to say "she", or seeing them referred to as "women" in the news...

luckystar · 2020-10-02T02:05:32+00:00

This article is so depressing to read... It seems obvious to me that these are just young lesbians trying to identify out of oppression. Oh you thought you were a lesbian, but now you think you're not a lesbian because you're attracted to some humans who identify as transgender or non binary? Do those humans happen to be biologically female? Because boy oh boy do I have some news for you

luckystar · 2020-09-01T01:16:27+00:00

Yeah these questions are odd, I think the OP has radfems mixed up with like... conservative Bible thumpers.
The God question annoyed me too lol.

What I found especially funny is all the questions being like "Would it make you ANGRY and VIOLENT if a man were to wear a dress?". Like (A) No we think that is fine that is literally the entire point; (B) show me even one case of a radical feminist being violent to anyone, trans or otherwise.

luckystar · 2020-07-20T23:08:54+00:00

It's definitely brought the issue out into the open. My friend group has gone both ways. Some have come out as much more GC than even me, others have come out as fully on board the TRA train. Lost a "non binary" friend --white male who always presented male (even grew his beard out ffs), who just tried on makeup from time to time, and thought that made him "no longer a man" apparently. Not much of a loss but it still is disappointing to see your friends go that way/

luckystar · 2020-07-27T21:58:22+00:00

I will gladly die on this hill. In general I don't mind referring to trans people the way that feels comfortable but things like sexual attraction are absolutely where we have to make it clear that there is a material difference that can't be "identified" away.

Trans people almost by definition tend to have a mix of male and female primary and secondary sex characteristics at best and simply look obviously like a member of their birth sex at worst. I am sure it's a bitter pill to swallow, but if you have both biological male and biological female traits (eg breasts and a penis, or a vagina and a beard) then the only people who are going to be sexually attracted to you are bisexual/pansexual people by definition. You can't just ignore one part of the body during sex, sex is a whole body thing.

As for the bottom surgery: it's not currently possible to completely replicate genitals on a person of the opposite sex. Actually, most people assume that bottom surgery outcomes are much better than the reality. A surgically created "vagina" doesn't grip or lubricate, a surgically created "penis" needs a pump to get erect and doesn't ejaculate. These are pretty basic factors that make sex enjoyable. There's a reason why most trans people don't get bottom surgery -- technology isn't advanced enough yet.

luckystar · 2020-09-09T04:54:32+00:00

The height analogy always made the most sense to me. Like yes, if somebody is 6 ft tall, they are overwhelmingly likely to be male, but that doesn't mean we need to go schedule the entire WNBA for double mastectomies because "tall bodies are male bodies".

There's also the fact that if there were such a thing as "male brains" and "female brains", the occurrence of men with "female brains" and vice versa would disprove their existence, as they would no longer be "male brains" or "female brains" any more than 6 ft is a "male height".

Then there's the fact that even if somebody's brain did more closely match the opposite sex -- so what? The determination of sex, in terms of biology, which applies to wayyyyyy more organisms than just humans, relates to gamete size, nothing more, nothing less. Brains can have correlations with each sex but they are not any part of determining sex -- there are literally plants that are male or female, and they don't have brains at all. This is the same reason why the "sex is a spectrum" logic is flawed -- you can't be more female or less female: you might have more traits typically associated with producers of large immobile gametes, but having, say, a PCOS beard doesn't mean you're somehow "less female", it just means you have one body trait more commonly found in ejaculators.

luckystar · 2020-09-09T04:34:01+00:00

As a side note, it's interesting how the story of Mulan is interpreted differently by different audiences. In the West, it seems to be interpreted as a you-go-girl, women can do anything just as well as the boys can, female empowerment narrative. In China, the narrative is actually about filial piety -- the idea is that Mulan is so loyal to her father that when he is too ill to fight in the war, she goes to great lengths to fight in his place. The moral is kinda like "even this woman went to war out of respect for her elders, what's your excuse?"

Either way you look at it, Mulan being female is central to the story.

luckystar · 2020-07-20T23:16:23+00:00

I lurk in trans groups on Facebook and every now and then somebody will actually confess that that is their entire logic -- "anybody can be a woman and a woman can be anything". But 9 times out of 10 you get responses like "You are not worth the emotional labor of educating" which really means "I can't think of a way to justify my own arguments so I'm not going to try".

luckystar · 2020-08-13T20:12:13+00:00

I think their last reddit post was threatening suicide and it's been over 2 weeks since they posted again. But I agree, without a news story or obituary (are those public in Sweden?) or some concrete evidence, we don't know if they actually committed suicide or just stepped away from reddit for awhile

luckystar · 2020-07-12T22:37:51+00:00

I was a staunch ally before researching this topic -- and by researching and I do mean by listening directly to them: watching YTers like Riley Dennis and Contrapoints, lurking on the various pro trans subreddits, joining leftbook FB groups that discussed trans issues. The more I learn the more I realize it's all bullshit.

I highly recommend the FB group "Sounds like you need to be educated on transgender people", and subreddits such as egg_irl and trraaa. You don't need to link radfem sites to people. If they listen directly to what trans activists are saying they realize that it is BS. Most progressives are going along with it because it doesn't affect their personal life and they have a binary view of the world where there is a "good" and "bad" in every argument and "transphobe" means "bad". Every time I've shown somebody the Riley Dennis video on 'genital preferences' it peaks them lol

luckystar · 2020-07-11T05:30:41+00:00

That thread is utterly nauseating and just shows how "actuallesbians" is completely overrun with male people. I like how there are tons of removed comments with replies like "Comparing trans women to men is transphobic"... reality is transphobic sweetheart, you do look like a man, you should be glad people aren't lying to you.
I'm sure it sucks to be trans because most monosexual people are going to be turned off by either your primary or secondary sex characteristics. That doesn't excuse creeping on lesbians and trying to use "woke" language to shame them for being lesbians. Jfc.

luckystar · 2020-07-26T00:19:21+00:00

What's really sad is there are reasonable trans people that aren't trying to overstep their boundaries -- usually older people that call themselves "transsexual", think Buck Angel, Blaire White etc. But they are ostracized by their own, ask any of the "non binary girldick having biological female bisexual demiromantic lesbian" anime avatar uwus and they'll tell you that the reasonable transsexuals are "cis bootlickers" and "internalized transphobia". The face of the movement at this point is an anime girl avatar shouting "terfs suck my girldick or die a bloody death" and the more people that are exposed to that behavior the more people will peak. LGBT acceptance has gone DOWN for the first time in over a decade and it's all the fault of those clowns.

luckystar · 2020-09-07T04:51:51+00:00

These people are narcissists, full stop. For every little thing they complain about, there are counterparts. There are tons of women that don't get their period for all sorts of reasons. There are women that have had hysterectomies, yet they don't demand "woman" be replaced with "people with uteruses". Hell we can extend this to everything else. We don't say "People without impaired vision" or "People who still have both legs" etc. ONLY trans activists are pushing this nonsense. Normal people see the words "man" and "woman" and understand what it means.

luckystar · 2020-09-01T01:13:27+00:00

The questions are very awkward and many of them are written in a way where it's not possible to agree OR disagree. Is this for a school project or something?

luckystar · 2020-08-11T05:10:18+00:00

I call this the magic words. Just say "I'm trans" and poof you are now the most oppressed minority in the entire world. Just say "I'm a woman" and poof you are a woman and always have been. Then go ahead and say you're a man and now you're a man again and always have been.

There was some British musician or something named Zuby who did a great little prank where he got the "world record in women's weightlifting" by claiming he was identifying as a woman during the weightlifting.

e: found it again, link: https://twitter.com/zubymusic/status/1100348562041462784

luckystar · 2020-07-20T23:03:51+00:00

It's so deeply offensive when they try to imply Westerners "invented" the "gender binary". As if nobody knew where babies came from until the white man came to enlighten them.

luckystar · 2020-07-18T07:00:45+00:00

Tbh, just keep pushing their logic to its natural conclusion. Post an image of two burly gay men in a loving embrace. "This is my girlfriend and I, we are valid lesbians too, transphobes get out". Call anyone who questions you a TERF.

luckystar · 2020-07-17T02:42:25+00:00

Those signs are fucking awful. I get it that there can be value in giving people the benefit of the doubt, I have heard cases of eg butch lesbians being hassled in women's bathrooms because they were mistaken for men at first. But if a whole ass middle aged man looking like this dude comes in I WILL leave and report it. "Always accept everything" is an unbelievably terrible policy.

luckystar · 2020-08-28T04:17:26+00:00

What is up with all the rude replies in this thread???

OP might have better luck over on Ovarit. I cannot believe that people here are seriously trying to call her bisexual or gaslight her further. Young lesbians nowadays are told they have to accept TWAW and accept the girldick; OP is struggling now with the disparity between TRA woke speak and material reality. That doesn't mean she's bisexual, it means she was the victim of homophobic conversion therapy passing itself off as "trans rights". She obviously isn't into men, and this man in particular is pretty horrible. She's using female pronouns because publicly (at least in progressive circles, especially among younger people) everyone will treat you like garbage if you don't "respect people's preferred pronouns". We can explain to her that it's okay to use biologically accurate pronouns here, not just shame her. If she can't get acceptance here where can she?

luckystar · 2020-08-19T22:03:38+00:00

Trans women are women.
Meat eating vegans are vegans.
Childless mothers are mothers.
Winged cats are cats.
Muslim Catholics are Catholics.

luckystar · 2020-08-13T19:11:23+00:00

Later in the article she says "my wife" and says she's willing to forgive """her""" so maybe they did get back together?

luckystar · 2020-08-13T18:25:59+00:00

They want to fit in in left leaning crowds and they think claiming to be a marginalized minority wins them oppression points. Non binary is the easiest marginalized minority to be because (a) literally everybody is "non binary" as in the sense of, occasionally or frequently feeling disconnect with gender roles / (b) you're not allowed to question any sort of trans identity because all identities are VaLiD. You can't fake being black. You can sorta fake being gay but not if you're in a hetero relationship. However to be trans non binary you literally have to do fuck all but claim you don't like your birth sex.

I know a man who claimed to be non binary and literally had a beard! Nobody would ever see him as anything but a man. He painted his nails sometimes, wow, how stunning and brave! He got into socialist/Bernie Bro politics circles where being oppressed makes you fit in better. Sad thing is I'm sure on some level he did dislike being a man, but not because of gender dysphoria or anything, just because he was the dreaded "cishet white male" which is the worst thing you can be in internet anime/communist circles.

I have almost never seen anyone but middle to upper middle class hard left leaning white people do this "non binary" nonsense. The overwhelming majority of them are very obviously quite comfortable in their biological sex -- women that show off cleavage and curves, men with beards, etc. Most of them are actually gender conforming much of the time! A woman with her profile picture of herself in a WEDDING DRESS calling herself "non binary". Yeah ok sis, sounds legit.

Don't even get me started on all the other cultures they refer to, 9 times out of 10 when they talk about a "third gender", that culture has a word for being gay or being a trans woman (they don't pretend trans women are literally women). And virtually no "AFAB" can be the "third gender" from those cultures because women are needed as baby incubators. Only male people can opt out of manhood, because men are more expendable in terms of reproduction.

A different culture having a term that basically means "f*ggot" or "sissy" is NOT your "woque non binary folx" ffs.

TBH I don't care in general if people want to think of themselves as unique snowflakex that are just so much deeper and more complex than the "gender binary" (which they imagine for the majority of people that they love being GI Joes and Barbie Dolls). It's when they start whining about how they are le trans and thus the most oppressed ever, when by definition they are some of the most privileged people who ever live, that my blood starts to boil. That male former friend with the beard started telling me "you don't get to define who is a woman" and I was just. Done. Who the fuck do these people think they are.

luckystar · 2020-07-31T03:13:46+00:00

In San Francisco they do this with the race of suspects. Similar reason -- don't want to promote bias or whatever. https://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/2020/07/01/san-francisco-police-stop-common-practice-of-releasing-suspect-booking-mugshots/ Seems like a roundabout way of dealing with problems.

luckystar · 2020-07-28T22:45:28+00:00

I hate this shit so much "Gender binary is a Western colonial invention!". Confucian thought strongly influence[d] China, Japan, Korea, Taiwan, and Vietnam for thousands of years and has a clear "gender binary" as one of its most fundamental tenets. Literally far more humans on earth live in a Confucian patriarchal "gender binary" culture than in a Western one. These people can't see beyond their own backyards and think they're worldly because they said they don't like white people lol.

luckystar · 2020-07-17T18:58:52+00:00

Good. Start going after men. Then greater society will actually pay attention to the issue.

luckystar · 2020-07-12T06:21:11+00:00

Cancelled.. reminds me of this quote : "What's more likely: That a load of life-long left-leaning LGBT-supporting women have inexplicably and uncharacteristically all suddenly become bigots or that one might be missing something here?"

luckystar · 2020-09-23T21:07:13+00:00

God that thread is depressing. It's always the same story with the AGPs: Man is married for years, even decades, then announces he's a woman, suddenly the family finances now revolve around "affirming" his fetish, he acts crueler and more narcissistic than ever before, he casts aside his own kids accusing them of being "transphobic" i.e. not elated about dad living a fetish 24/7 and wasting their college funds on inverting his penis, the wife tries to accommodate for a time but ultimately breaks down (unless you're Amanda Jette Knox), dad -- oh i mean "mom", we must be accepting & affirming after all -- makes a new group of friends who are fellow AGPs that drag him further into the cult and convince him that his whole family is in the wrong, not him.

In that thread there are MULTIPLE other posters talking about how their former husband or father acts like this.

How can anyone deny AGP is a thing?

luckystar · 2020-09-09T04:38:28+00:00

Oh man, I admire your courage. That paragraph would probably be a friendship-ender for many people I know. I'd have to couch it in terms of "even if she is a woman now, she's still a violent, predatory person that raped me as a teenager". What you write is correct, but not something I could just lead with, not in my part of the country at least.

luckystar · 2020-08-28T03:18:42+00:00

It shouldn’t be this controversial to ask humans to treat other humans with respect.

Having sex with people or playing along with their delusions goes way way beyond "respect". What disingenuous language

luckystar · 2020-08-24T21:01:00+00:00

It's actually almost remarkable how they can flip logic on its head like this. Men are oppressed by women for wanting to ape the sexist stereotype men created of women. O-kay buddy.

It's interesting how the misogyny jumps out with some people once pressed further. I've seen so many MRA-esque "but women can be violent criminals too!" "what about women who rape men?" arguments when pressed.

One of my favorites was a person claiming that saying women are biologically categorically less strong/capable in terms of sports is "sexism". They always have an anecdote of one very strong woman they know that they assume could beat their scrawny ass (and the sad thing is the biological reality is that that woman may very well still lose to them in a fight, because T just gives men that much of an advantage). Exactly like the typical sexist Redditor "equal rights equal fights" cheering on women getting punched in subreddits like JusticeServed or whatever.
When push comes to shove they have to rely on MRA arguments to defend their points.

luckystar · 2020-08-19T23:22:05+00:00

I don't care as much about this kind of thing. I am extremely anti "sex work" but that's because the entire industry is coercive and predatory and I've yet to be convinced it can be conducted in an ethical manner. I don't have any ill will or disrespect for the women involved, the problem is the industry. This tumblr (ugh) pretty much sums it up for me: https://helshades.tumblr.com/post/175297954562/kurukka-a-room-of-my-own-agneswsblog

luckystar · 2020-08-13T20:11:06+00:00

Half these kids identify as ace because they are literally pre-pubescent or currently going through puberty and so the idea of sex is confusing and unpleasant to them

luckystar · 2020-08-02T00:16:53+00:00

This sort of thing drives me crazy. I'm a progressive in all aspects and I'm concerned about gender ideology because I find it to be regressive, sexist, homophobic etc. I hate that it's so hard to find sources that will discuss this openly that aren't right wing or conservative leaning. I feel like I'm losing my mind sometimes because so many fellow progressives seem blind to these issues.

luckystar · 2020-07-29T19:50:40+00:00

Jazz Jennings is absolutely heartbreaking, that child never had a chance. Whole life ruined because "she" played with dolls at age 3. The whole family is fucked -- mom is blatant MBP, dad is too cowardly/busy with work to protect his kid, other siblings are chopped liver (Jazz even said he expected to use his sister's womb to give birth to a child for him). Jazz has never felt sexual desire and will never be able to orgasm, and he has to take hormones for the rest of his life. I haven't kept up with the chop job updates (bit too much for me to stomach) but IIRC the surgically constructed hole was infected/collapsing, because the puberty blockers and cross sex hormones meant he never developed an adult penis so they had to take skin from all over other parts of his body to construct his """vagina"""... Even child beauty pageant girls get to grow up and move on one day! How is this blatant child abuse filmed and celebrated? Are people horror watching like those shows about hoarders or 600 pound obese people?

luckystar · 2020-07-14T01:08:49+00:00

It would be interesting if nothing else to see if the goalposts were moved to the point that trans women were calling themselves AFAB lol. "This IS a female birth certificate. Sure it says 'male' on it, but I am a woman, and therefore this birth certificate is that of a female."

luckystar · 2020-07-13T19:44:37+00:00

They might be thinking if their child can fully "pass" one day that it'll be easier to "hide" than a child in a same sex relationship.

luckystar · 2020-07-13T02:58:26+00:00

Others have told me angrily that I have no reason for turning them down since I'm bisexual.

TIL bisexual apparently literally means you have to have sex with every person, who knew?

luckystar · 2020-10-02T01:02:00+00:00

There's a simple solution to that little problem. Explain you're not cis. Because in all likelihood, you're not -- Do you 100% of the time identify with all the social roles, behaviors, appearance, etc of your birth sex? If not, congrats, you're not cis! I think the actual % of the population that is "cis" is actually tiny, it's just that most of us don't sit around with our thumbs up our asses thinking about how special our ~relationship with gender~ is. Agender or non binary more accurately fits the average person who isn't literally a Barbie Doll or G.I. Joe.

luckystar · 2020-08-04T05:11:50+00:00

I agree with this. There is a really sexist, homophobic strain of creepy white dudes with anime profile pics identifying as "trans" nowadays, but many different cultures have terms for what GC would call "HSTS" trans people -- though some of the terms, like hijra, are quite derogatory and in general these "third gender" males (never heard of one for AFAB people) are afforded a low status in society.

luckystar · 2020-08-03T18:29:02+00:00

Warning: OP links to a Google Doc which can track your e-mail address if you click it. I've copy pasted the content below so you can read it w/o clicking.
Transcript: Mermaids Training - Part 1

Audio link:

https://drive.google.com/file/d/1cF90PFx5cSxHmKCI5Jwg0hqji9DDv8_f/view?usp=sharing

Mermaids - Trainer

MAW - Man At Work

A - Audience member(s)

Headings & time stamps:

(00:00) Babies, parties & gender (03:24) ‘I am not an expert on electricity...Colours...or even what a spectrum is…’ (05:00) Jelly babies = Gender identity. ‘Don’t think about it too hard...Trust me!’ (06:58) Introducing GI Joe... ‘Seriously! Stop thinking!’ (10:24) The saga of the Genderbread man - Brains, hearts, sex, science & style...never the twain shall meet… (15:23) Choose your stereotype...err, I mean Jelly Babies! (19:16) Intersex Navaho clownfish = Trans (24:45) Tomboys & male femininity (27:33) The problem with ‘Cis’... (32:26) ‘Transexuals, you’re outdated!’ Introducing the more fashionable choice of: Non-Binary, Gender-fluid & Gender-queer (Piers doesn’t know what they mean...hell, no one does, not even me!) (37:21) Sexuality. Trans rights are just like gay rights (46:23) Pronouns: from courtesy to hate crime

Babies, parties & gender...

Mermaids: ... the expectant mum can be just halfway through her pregnancy at 20 weeks and she can have a scan and find out if it's going to be a boy or a girl, so we now have the gender reveal parties.[laughter] Has anyone been to one? No? These are the next big thing after the baby shower. I went to my first one a couple of weeks ago and the parents didn't even know. So what they'd done is they'd gone for their scan, they'd got the ... what's the person who does the scan? Radiographer is it? ... to write it on the picture, put it in a sealed envelope, they then gave that envelope to their party planner, so they found out at the same time as we did. It was quite bizarre. It's all about building the anticipation and there's all guessing games and that leading up to it. But I sat there, and, I mean it was lovely, it was a lovely day, but ... my first thought was, this party cost a fortune, you'd have been better off putting money in the bank for the child. But then my second thought was, when they do the reveal, you're not going to go ‘I didn't want that’ are you? D'you know what I mean? You've got to be like, whoo! [laughter] So it was a little bit bizarre.

I've never heard of these gender reveal parties before. I'd heard of baby showers, but not an actual gender reveal, so I had a little google, and these are some examples of what I found, how people have announced the biological sex of their unborn child. So this one, the family filled a balloon with pink paint and the proud father shot it with an arrow, in a very phallic symbol of how the child got there in the first place, really. You can get cakes that are filled with either pink or blue sweets, so when you cut the cake open the sweets will cascade out. But that's my favourite one - the Harry Potter gender reveal. Any hufflepuffs? Yay! There's not many of us, there's not many. So depending on what you put into your cauldron, and obviously the spell, out will come either pink or blue smoke. Brilliant.

So what happens when we find out if it's a boy or a girl? Well the first thing, and it's instantaneous, we don't even realise we're doing it, the baby gets given its pronoun. So it stops being it, or baby, or bump, and gets he/she, his/hers. Straight away, we all do it. We probably will bin half of the names list, and even if we're going to choose a gender neutral name, often they're different spellings. We stop buying things in white, cream, lemon, mint green and we will get inundated with either pink or blue. We might even buy styles of clothing, so if it's going to be a baby girl, it's usually frills and them stupid headband things. If it's a boy, you'll often get tiny denim or tiny sports things, or them little romper suits with a slogan on, usually with the word dude somewhere. Our family and friends will start to talk about that child's future - ‘when he's older we're going to go there, when she's bigger, we're going to do this.’ There's plenty of families who will choose the school that the child will be educated at based on whether it is a boy or a girl. And for most kids that's fine because most kids will fit loosely somewhere within those boy and girl boxes, but lots of children don't.

luckystar · 2020-07-31T14:42:16+00:00

This is an important point, I see people laugh at radfems all the time for "making everything about trans women because they don't know trans men exist" or whatever.

That said actual trans men who transitioned like Buck Angel and Kalvin Garrah have pretty much all come out and said they don't want to be associated with menstruating because... wait for it... it reminds them they're biologically female. Which triggers gender dysphoria.

This crap is really pandering to boring teenage girls with affluenza who call themselves "non binary" because they "don't identify with womanhood [read: sexist gender roles]". And to virtue signallers in general.

luckystar · 2020-07-28T03:09:34+00:00

I honestly feel really bad for teens on egg irl. It's like incels, hapas, or any of the other "indoctrinating" subreddits for young unpopular kids. Teens are very impressionable and easily fall down a rabbit hole. It's a particularly insidious rabbit hole because the consequences of medical transition are pretty serious.

I'm kinda old now but I used to like anime at that age and so many of my friends and I would play as the opposite sex character in video games, dress up like the opposite sex ("crossplay"), use fake names, consume too much gay manga and hentai porn, etc. All part of normal youthful exploration, we were already the weird kids so the guys didn't feel ashamed if they wore a dress because who cares? We were so much freer on gender roles than kids today. Only one friend of mine transitioned, and she is genuinely transsexual (post everything) and doesn't try to overstep women's boundaries or anything, just lives her life.

I feel like if we were all teens nowadays, half of my friends would have "transitioned". Some who are moms of kids now would have gotten double mastectomies and had permanently lowered voices. Some of the guys might have been permanently medically castrated and not had kids at all. Just because they liked to look at anime girls. It's all so crazy to think about.

luckystar · 2020-07-20T23:14:09+00:00

You are totally fine. It took me until my 30s trying for pregnancy to fully appreciate the female body. I didn't really even understand biology or gender politics until it became very personal. And now we want kids to make these decisions. Regret is inevitable.
I'm so afraid for girls these days. If you go on Twitter there are detransition studies recruiting participants, I bet they would love to hear from you too.

luckystar · 2020-07-18T06:56:31+00:00

I'm not a mod just a casual user but personally I welcome this kind of post. We should be spending more of our time on women focused issues.

luckystar · 2020-07-14T02:23:21+00:00

This is a bit of a tangient from OP but, I get ads for egg donation and surrogacy on FB sometimes and it's just so disgusting. How is that legal?! You can't sell a kidney can you? Why is it okay to sell body parts as long as they are female body parts?

luckystar · 2020-07-12T22:40:28+00:00

Look up Danielle Muscato. Straight up a middle aged balding man. "She" took videos in a women's shelter. Show that to anyone who thinks self ID is a good idea.

luckystar · 2020-07-11T05:44:04+00:00

One of my favorite threads (I think it was on r/detrans) had a title like "Thanks for helping me realize I'm not trans" and somewhere in the post they linked to a picture of one of those Pokemon girls, so when on mobile all you saw before opening the thread was the title with the Pokemon girl next to it. IIRC one of the documentaries on trans kids also had very dramatic scenes of a MTF teenager playing a Pokemon game as the girl character with the narrator waxing poetic about how "she could be herself now". Like... if you're getting your whole ass identity from a children's video game then maybe you need to re-evaluate your life a bit first 😂

luckystar · 2020-09-13T20:28:56+00:00

For general stuff you can find it on any page discussing mastectomies for breast cancer https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/mastectomy/about/pac-20394670

I've heard of transmen losing nipples and/or losing sensation too.

Also, obviously implants cannot breastfeed an infant, nor can they restore sensation for the woman. They create the appearance of breasts, that's it.

luckystar · 2020-08-30T02:34:15+00:00

This argument is so weird. Like yes they're still a man by the dictionary definition but how many straight women or gay men would honestly want a partner who lost his penis in an accident? Maybe that's not politically correct to say but it's reality, people care about genitals in a partner.

luckystar · 2020-08-28T03:25:05+00:00

There is a guy on reddit that got vaginoplasty while keeping his johnson. Not for medical reasons or anything, he just wanted to have both genitalia. Try and tell me that's not a man with a fetish who watched a bit too much of the hentais.

luckystar · 2020-08-19T23:30:29+00:00

I'm actually wondering too because I not too long ago moved to a city that is all about self ID. I haven't been to public pools yet due to the whole covid thing but I'm kinda nervous about it now.

luckystar · 2020-08-16T05:31:56+00:00

I think being female and a lesbian definitely means society will be harder on her than male celebs. I don't know exactly what she did but if it was about being a hardass/mistreating employees I'm sure plenty of male entertainers did similar and it was brushed off or even lauded as strong leadership or whatever.

luckystar · 2020-08-14T23:21:18+00:00

Yeah, I'm gonna disagree on this one. Men can and are capable of loving women -- of course then you get into the weeds of how we define "love" -- but if we're asking if men prefer their friends and only put up with women in order to get sex... I'm not doubting that there are some relationships like this, but that's definitely not the only type of relationship model out there. I've seen many cases of men that prefer to hang out with their wife rather than their male friends. Assuming we're talking about your typical "cishet" couple here... remember humans evolved for millennia to reproduce. Asking if men and women can love one another is like asking if humans and dogs can love one another. Either you've defined "love" to mean an emotion that doesn't exist, or the answer is obviously yes as we've literally naturally selected for thousands of years for those capable of this kind of love.

If anything I'd guess the husband in the show you watched is secretly gay or bi. "Tranny porn" is a particular niche fetish, and as I understand it a lot of the appeal comes from being able to engage in homosexual acts but still feel "straight". This is also where the "trans women getting murdered" comes from -- men getting a trans woman prostitute, then in their "post nut clarity" realizing they had sex with a man and going into a rage due to self disgust.

Anyway, so love and attraction can come in many forms. Homosexual and bisexual people obviously exist, though they're in the minority compared with heterosexual people. And of course humans can reproduce without love -- think of all the raping & pillaging conquests -- but since tiny humans are fairly resource intensive, and childbirth is really fucking hard (thanks bipedalism), humans tend to be more interdependent than most mammals. We all know that for say, a cat, or an otter, the males just bang the females and then bail, and the momma gets by just fine on her own. Humans aren't really like that, we're one of the few species where the female can (and often is) be entirely dependent on the male for resources (ie, stay at home mom). Obviously we do have single mom scenarios in humans too, but it generally is correlated with worse outcomes.

Basically I feel like you're asking if most men are gay or bi, and I don't think they are. It's probably a higher percent than a survey would reveal (due to lingering stigma) but not a majority by any means.

Do you know many older couples? I feel like the fact that men can love women is more obvious if you talk to older couples who've been together for decades. Yeah there's the cliche boomer that hates his wife but there's also many couples where they obviously enjoy being together. I don't know of other species that are that monogamous except maybe those penguins.

luckystar · 2020-08-05T18:12:00+00:00

I feel so bad for them. There's stories online of "trans widows" and they're all so depressing. The man "comes out" as female usually during a time when the woman is getting more attention (pregnancy/childbirth) and almost universally focus on a fetishized version of "womanhood" with garters and lacy lingerie, and never actually engage in the less pleasant sides of "womanhood" like taking care of kids or doing chores. But by the time you've had a child with a man you're in so deep that divorce can be a terrifying idea, then combine that with women being socialized to a nurturing/caretaker role, so they spend all this time coddling their husband's feelings and showing him how to apply makeup and shit. It honestly sounds almost even worse than those women that marry inmates or NEETs that play video games all day. The martyr complex involved.

luckystar · 2020-07-30T16:11:00+00:00

White SJWs are the absolute worst. They pretend they're up on their high horse while constantly saying racist things! They make up terms like BIPOC which no actual black people use. They appropriate the shit out of indigenous stuff in ways they don't understand ("Two spirit" was invented in the 90s and really is just a catch all term for LGBT, it is not a "third gender"). They invent terms like Latinx which no actual Latin people like to use. They say stuff like "gender binary is a Western invention" when there are plenty of cultures with a stricter gender binary than "the West".

Most of these clowns have never left their own backyard but they pretend to know something of the world. It's so frustrating -- I'll never fit in with the right and I don't agree with them on economic and social issues, but the left is also insulting to me...

luckystar · 2020-07-27T21:49:54+00:00

I'm not sure, but I do think it's a good idea to restrict it to detrans people. Much like how BPT restricts to black/brown people, and how all the women centered subreddits are awful because they allow men. Almost by definition a vulnerable community will be overrun by outsiders if they don't take such measures to protect their community.

luckystar · 2020-10-02T00:46:40+00:00

This stuff makes no sense. People aren't attracted to the words "I identify as a [wo]man". We are attracted to one sex or the other (unless you're bi)

luckystar · 2020-08-21T21:55:13+00:00

It is important that we do not apply our modern biases onto historical people and events. We aren't even settled on a definition of "transgender" nowadays(do non binary people count? non dysphoric? cross dressers?), so that makes it even less salient to historical analysis. It makes everything even more complicated when talk about female historical figures when we consider that until very recently, women's participation in the public sphere was EXTREMELY limited, and there were obvious incentives to present oneself as a man that had nothing to do with one's own identity.

One of my favorite historical figures, Qiu Jin, who fought for the end of footbinding, published the first women's newspaper in China, and was an important figure in the Chinese revolution, also dressed/presented as a man often, and fled her arranged marriage. If Qiu Jin were alive today, would she identify as a trans man, gender queer, non binary? Personally, I highly doubt that. But either way, that's a question we can't answer because those terms did not exist in her time, and thus it wouldn't be appropriate to use those terms. She just as likely would have been a woman who doesn't even wear men's clothing if not out of necessity. She wrote poetry about women's liberation and obviously her pet issues (like ending footbinding and promoting women's literacy) were about women. Being GNC or presenting as a man, for women in history, was often a survival skill. It really tells us nothing about the "gender identity" of these historical women who did not have the luxury of thinking of "gender" in such terms.

I'm just thanking god that my favorite historical figures are generally not white so the TRAs don't know they exist and thus won't try to posthumously trans them.

luckystar · 2020-08-18T16:42:40+00:00

We should try this lol. Either they're forced to admit the double standard, or they lose their precious porn as a consequence for not allowing lesbians to have conversations that aren't about men

luckystar · 2020-08-10T18:43:35+00:00

I'm hoping they go after the straight men tbh. That's when we'll start seeing actual backlash; they're literally the only group in society that can do this. Joe Rogan gets millions of views and won't be "canceled" the way a woman like JKR was.

luckystar · 2020-07-22T01:39:33+00:00

The sad thing is the gaming environment is SO hostile to women that mostly male socialized people feel comfortable in it. Every time I see a "first woman wins tournament in [insert video or card game here]" I check and more often than not it's a transwoman.

luckystar · 2020-07-19T00:33:43+00:00

The same WHO that let coronavirus spread because they didn't accept data from Taiwan because of political pressure from China. Yeah, they seem like a good objective arbiter of health standards, no vulnerability to manipulation at all.

luckystar · 2020-07-18T06:58:22+00:00

I mean, that's like the same logic of meeting someone you know at an AA meeting. For somebody to post a link on here they must be at least relatively aware of how to find this forum in the first place. Conversely, somebody clicking a link on here doesn't prove that they are GC or not; they could very well just be a QT or neutral lurker trying to get information

luckystar · 2020-07-17T03:20:13+00:00

Joe Rogan is interesting to me because I can't quite figure out who his target audience is. Maybe that's why he's so popular. Either way this will definitely get a lot more attention to this issue. Joe Rogan had had Buck Angel on before too.

luckystar · 2020-07-14T01:47:26+00:00

Hell they are transphobic even. They kick out people with actual gender dysphoria like Blaire White and Buck Angel. It's a mix of fetishists, teenage special snowflakes, furries, white people who wanna feel oppressed, "not like the other girls" girls...

luckystar · 2020-10-02T00:49:43+00:00

The rewriting of history and changing the identities of deceased lgb people is super messed up....

luckystar · 2020-09-22T06:06:19+00:00

And for some reason California looked at Canada and the UK and was like "Yep this sounds like a splendid idea and definitely one to implement back home"

luckystar · 2020-09-09T07:34:44+00:00

Thank you for saying this. A vaginoplasty cannot self lubricate (at least not with the same thing as women, because men lack those glands), cannot grip (it is a hole, a real vagina is a muscle), usually can't take very deep penetration (unlike a real vagina which expands upon arousal), and more often than not looks very obviously not like the real deal. Not to mention the risks of poop smell & hair growing on the inside. And that's just for sexual intercourse, a vaginoplasty also obviously cannot birth a child or menstruate either.
They're really just flesh tubes to be pounded. Because that's what men think women are for.

luckystar · 2020-09-07T04:45:38+00:00

“I didn’t believe that having periods would be a part of my lived experience,” Jones told NBC News. “I felt isolated; everything about periods was tailored to girls, yet me, a boy, was experiencing this and nothing in the world documented that.”

Who the FUCK was educating this child and told them they were a boy and not that they would have female biological functions??? This is such an egregious gap in education/parenting

"Having a period already causes me a lot of [gender] dysphoria, but this dysphoria becomes heightened when I have to shop for a product that is labeled as ‘women’s health’ and in most cases, is pretty and pink,” Jones explained.

Oh god forbid there be the color pink. As we all know, no man has ever worn pink.

luckystar · 2020-09-07T04:37:44+00:00

Honestly, we need to just start spamming that subreddit with images of burly gay men. "My girlfriend and I -- pre everything transbians, still valid girls". If lesbians can't have it then nobody should.

luckystar · 2020-09-02T04:21:37+00:00

I'm really despairing. I'm a lifelong Democrat voter and yet I cannot understand the party on this issue at all. It's so horribly regressive. This feels like the hugest gaslighting imaginable. I was looking for more info and found this

https://www.cwlc.org/wp-content/uploads/2019/04/CWLC-SB-132-Letter-of-Support-4.16.19.pdf

SB 132 will require CDCR to assign housing placement within a correctional facility according to a transgender person’s gender identity unless there are security concerns. By doing so, California will decrease the likelihood of violence against these individuals. The bill also requires that the preferred first name, gender pronoun and honorific of the incarcerated transgender individual be used by facility staff in all communications, and permits incarcerated transgender people to specify the gender of correctional officers who may conduct lawful body searches on them. CWLC’s mission is to break down barriers and advance the potential of women and girls through transformative litigation, policy advocacy and education. SB 132 will help ensure the safety and dignity of incarcerated transgender people. For these reasons, the California Women’s Law Center strongly supports SB 132.

How the FUCK is housing men(over 99% of rapists, over 90% of violent convictions) in women's prisons "advanc[ing] the potential of women and girls"? How the FUCK is forcing female officers to perform body searches on male inmates on demand supporting the rights of women?!

Do they really not see the risk here?! Put penis people in women's prisons, what the fuck do they think will happen? Seriously!

Who is OK with this, and how? Are they naive? Paid off? Severely out of touch with prison realities? A woman signed off on this letter. Why are women throwing each other under the bus like this??

I really feel like I'm losing my mind...

luckystar · 2020-08-28T04:53:32+00:00

Libfems, the stalker subreddit, and TRAs in general often chant that the existence of trans men makes all "T*RF" theory collapse. They only say that because they have only a superficial understanding of what radfems believe, and they've mostly been exposed to cherry picked examples of people using GC theory to further actual transphobia (stuff like the people who say literally every trans woman is a predator-- obviously if that was the only thing at hand then trans men wouldn't exist).

To clarify, I can only speak for myself really but I consider myself a radfem and I would absolutely include trans men and "AFAB" non binary people in my feminism. Obviously many (most?) of them won't want to be included, so I won't force it on them or anything, but I believe the goal of feminism is to fight for the rights of women as a sex class. I think oppression is based on something you can't change, and you cannot literally change your sex, therefore I still think trans women and "AFAB" non binaries are oppressed on the basis of their female sex.

There have been several recorded cases of men (both trans identified and not trans identified) raping pre/non-op trans men; male on female rape is inherently more dangerous and harmful than other forms due to the risk of pregnancy and the difference in physical strength between the sexes. In one case a trans woman raped a trans man while saying that they wanted the trans man to "have [his] non-binary babies". Even for people who claim to transcend biological sex, the laws of nature don't change.

So even if they don't want us to fight for them, I will fight for the rights of trans men. I don't think they're all confused lesbians or "betrayers of womanhood" or whatever. Some are indeed self hating lesbians or just self hating women period -- detransitioner stories tell us this. However I also believe that there exist trans men who have gender dysphoria and feel happiest living life "as a man", and I support their right to live their life the way that feels authentic to them.

Anyway, that was a huge foreword (mostly targeted at stalkers/lurkers) just to say: I find the focus on trans women to the exclusion of trans men in the trans movement a very telling example of how bio sex matters even in spite of gender identity. This prioritizing of trans women over trans men happens at all levels and in all directions (internal and external supporters). I can think of no other group of people for whom women's voices and concerns are consistently prioritized over those of men.

In my observation, the most prominent trans men (people like Buck Angel, Calvin Garrah, etc) are all realistic/accept that biological sex exists. It is more the trans women who want to pretend it doesn't exist. This to me strongly mirrors how white people say they "don't see race", whereas no non white person would say the same. When you're oppressed for something, you know you can't just ignore the reality that it's there.

The fact that "trans women are women" is a slogan while "trans men are men" is not (except as a half hearted after thought, ONLY after "trans women are women") is another sign.

The fact that r/askgaybros and other gay men subreddits are allowed to exist while lesbian subreddits are banned and the "trans inclusive" one left standing is overrun with "transbians" who dominate discourse, make every topic about their "girldicks", constantly require validation, etc.

The fact that we have people like Amanda Jette Knox gaining praise for centering her life around her male spouse's "journey to womanhood", whereas the "trans widows" are shamed -- women must stand by and support their man no matter what. But what of trans men? Where are the droves of middle aged moms deciding to go on T, grow a beard, call themselves "Aiden"? Imagine if these trans men actually existed -- what do you think their husbands would be expected to do? How many of their husbands would brainwash themselves into thinking they're gay? Or be shamed for not being 'supportive' of their spouse?

The way trans men are ignored, cast aside, and diminished by the very people who are supposed to be their community to me is just further stronger evidence that biological sex matters in a way one can't simply "identify" out of. The way women with families virtually never become trans men shows to me that biological sex matters.

luckystar · 2020-08-14T20:55:48+00:00

Damn I was literally just thinking about this case the other day! I thought the original judgment, where both parents have to make medical decisions together and if they can't come to an agreement then a neutral third party makes the decision, was very fair and reasonable. It's blatantly obvious that the mom has an "agenda" (wants attention for trans kid, possibly trying to 'punish' her ex since James/Luna is not her biological child) but honestly listening to the dad he has an agenda too (very bible thumping "ain't no son of mine gonna be a sissy" type attitude).

I have been looking and looking but I can't find videos of James/Luna himself talking about what he prefers. A child of that age is too young to conceptualize what biological sex and being transgender mean. Kids that age think all girls have long hair and all boys have short hair, that's their concept of genders. I remember being that age and knowing a family friend that was a woman with short hair and being absolutely mindboggled because her voice sounded like a girl but she clearly was a boy? then growing older and being like "oh, duh, she's just a woman with short hair".

My guess? The boy is probably just effeminate, possibly going to grow up to be gay, and both parents have different ideas about how to "fix" that.

luckystar · 2020-08-13T19:43:30+00:00

I agree with you. This is why I can never go full radfem, because I do believe transexual people exist, I just think they are a tiny group of people who've been drowned out by fetishists, cross dressers, special snowflakes, and other trenders.

I am a gender abolitionist too, but I also recognize that gender exists in our current society and I think for people who have crippling gender dysphoria diagnosed by doctors/psychotherapists and go through the medical steps (hormones, surgeries, etc) I am okay with viewing them as women. (with notable exceptions for sports, shelters, and medical situations) But bathrooms? I couldn't care less. A women's book group or something? I mean if they participate in good faith and don't try to dominate conversations then I'm fine with it.

Even more so when we consider many of these dysphoric MTF are attracted to men! I'm thinking of people like Blaire White or Rose of Dawn here: in my mind I would think of them as a woman, yeah if it really got down to it then no they are not truly women, but they've already expressed that they don't intend to try to take women's resources or do anything else to hurt women. I can't understand fully what's going on in their brains, but if it makes them happy and they are respectful/don't overstep boundaries, then I don't have a problem with them and even support them making the choices that make them most happy.

I have a good friend like this too and I guess I kinda feel like -- she uprooted her whole life and went to such great lengths to be seen as a woman, and she's not participating in women's sports or waving her (now non existent) "girldick" around lesbians or anything -- those actions would mortify her because her worst nightmare is making people uncomfortable -- yeah she's not REALLY a woman but I am willing to play along because I can tell it's important to her and it is doing no harm to me. This is the kind of person that well meaning libfems think of when they're talking about supporting trans women. I just think that they are a very rare kind of person, and most of the people claiming to be "trans women" these days do NOT match the description.

Speaking of which, I especially don't really feel threatened by post bottom surgery trans women because their ability for sexual assault has greatly diminished (yes I know it's still possible, but at least they can't impregnate anyone). I do not trust any trans "woman" with a penis, I understand some might be reluctant to do surgery for legitimate reasons (no $$$, fear of botched surgery), but I do think you need dysphoria to be a trans person and part of that would include not liking having male parts. The minute the "girldick" term comes up I instantly brand them as fetishist/predator because by definition they like being a male and having a male reproductive system, and I will NEVER accept them as a woman in any way shape or form.

I also think somebody can be a transsexual FTM without being a self hating lesbian or whatever. Again I see the great lengths someone like say, Kalvin Garrah or Buck Angel, goes to to be viewed as a man by society and I have a certain level of respect for that. They know they are biologically female, they just feel more comfortable being perceived as a man. Again it comes down to rights and safety issues, and FTM are not threatening other biological women, so who cares?

I know the radfem opinion is that these people are aping sexist stereotypes and thus promoting said stereotypes, but I think that a lot of biological men and women do the same thing and there are a lot more of non trans people promoting these stereotypes. I do think in an ideal world we'd have no gender stereotypes and we could say "Blaire White is a man who likes looking a certain way and there's nothing wrong with that", but like... let's be real. The overwhelming majority of society is not there yet and probably won't be within my lifetime. This is also why the "theys" and people who pick gender pronouns incongruous with their appearance (say, the men with beards that call themselves "she"), and pronoun announcing in general annoys me. I think that unless you're in a medical or sport situation or otherwise around the person undressed, the truth is that for the rest of the time their chromosomes (nor self perceived "gender ID") do not matter as much as what society is going to clock them as. I tend to lean utilitarian in my philosophy so I think that for truly dysphoric individuals, transition is the best option in the sense that we have to be realistic and recognize that gender stereotypes were not invented by trans people, but they influence how the whole of society operates and it will take much longer before we can get to the point where your average bloke on the street would view Blaire White's presentation as acceptable for a man.

I also differ from radfems a bit in the sense that I think completely eliminating gender is not possible. I think we can greatly reduce the effect biological sex has on the gender roles people are expected to fill (contrast the options of lifestyle for a biological female in, say, Yemen, vs. Sweden...), but I think that as a dimorphic species in which males are much stronger than females and females bear the offspring, human society is always going to assign certain attributes and roles to the different sexes beyond their role in reproduction. And us women as the more disadvantaged of the two, are always going to be victim to society (both men and other women) trying to coerce us to act a certain way that is ultimately more conducive for the role of mother, because we humans have evolved over millennia specifically through selecting for the women that were willing and/or able to become mothers. This also means that in any society there's always going to be some tension around people who do not fit this role, either due to their sexual preference or due to the gender role they want to adopt not being ideal for reproduction (so LGBT basically). It's a depressing thought for sure, so I try not to dwell on it too hard, but it is what it is.

luckystar