What will happen if gay marriage is legalized?

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[–]jet199 9 insightful - 5 fun9 insightful - 4 fun10 insightful - 5 fun -  (12 children)

They forgot, gay people will mostly get divorced because they aren't suited to a monogamous lifestyle which will lead them to hand over thousands of their hard earned money over to lawyers thereby bringing their average wealth back in line with straights.

You got played by the equity gremlins.

All must have equal outcomes. Now you can be as miserable as the rest of us. Mwhahaha.

[–]UncleJemima 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (10 children)

Moreover - these recently married gay people will convert many Saiditors and numerous Christians to gays!

[–]Tom_Bombadil 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Moreover - these recently married gay people will convert many Saiditors and numerous Christians to gays!

And thus, your aunt Jemima became your uncle Jemima. This put your uncle Ben in a difficult position.

The two of them worked out their differences, and ultimately that saved their marriage.

Uncle Ben had to publicly acknowledge that he was technically a homosexual, and that he was married to another man.

Uncle Jemima made some concessions by agreeing to fulfill his role as the "birthing parent" in the marriage, and he also agreed to stop wearing his fake mustache in public.

In early spring of 2021 they announced that Uncle Jemima was pregnant with their first child.

The obgyn convinced uncle Jemima to get the COVID vaccine.

Uncle Jemima went into labor shortly thereafter, and the baby was stillborn during the 36th week.

They continue to try to conceive, but they haven't had any success.

And Uncle Jemima is wearing his moustache again.

[–]UncleJemima 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

You have a very good memory, Tom.

Except I was already taking Ivermectin when I got the COVID vaccine.

The combination of those and my Testosterone shots resulted in a very rare condition known as "equus ferus przewalskii phalicum", which ment that my metoidioplasty (penis surgically constructed from my hoo-ha) grew to the size of a horse penis.

Indeed, Uncle Ben's long gone, but the pool boy has moved in.

(and socks says, welcome back! lol)

[–]Tom_Bombadil 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I'm glad to hear about the equus ferus przewalskii phalicum, and you seem satisfied with the outcome. A well-deserved turn of fortune.

I know a fella who had dos equus ferus przewalskii phalicum. Also known as "dos Equus".

This fella's condition is the double dingus version of what you experienced, but the double dingus was a conjoined dingus; connected at the head.
Accompanied by a scrotum like a saddle bag.

He tried to surgically separate his double dingus, but there were complications. He lost them both.

Though the double dingus was short lived. His legacy lives on. Shining as a beacon of inspiration to others.

His scrotum remains intact to this very day. A pelvic monolith of a bygone era.

[–]UncleJemima 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Thank you. Best wishes for the Dos Equus fella, who had the potential to be the most interesting man in the world. I recommend he contact the 'donate a scrotum foundation' where he could raise enough money to to get a new dingus. They'd let him keep one ball. The only side effect is the potential to become the dick-tater of a small country, like Ireland.

As it happens, an occasional favorite topic on Saidit is that there are only two sexes, which is why I ask: but what if I haz a jelly roll and a sausage? How do I apply for a passport?

[–]Tom_Bombadil 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

There are only two sexes.

There are no genders. Dr. John "Pedo" Money conjured that term into existence.

if I haz a jelly roll and a sausage? How do I apply for a passport?

The non-binary category exists on the passport application.
Santa Claus also exists on paper.

Apply with the sex that's documented in your birth certificate.

You are putting the federal govt on lawful legal notice that you have identified the fraud that was put upon you at birth.
You are rebutting the fraudulent presumption.

Minimize ambiguity. ;-)

[–]jet199 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Yeah, that's not hitting.

I'm not even sure what the target was.

[–]UncleJemima 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (3 children)

Notice how often Saiditors call one another faggots and refer to comments as 'gay'? The process has begun.

[–]weavilsatemyface 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Notice how often Saiditors call one another faggots and refer to comments as 'gay'? The process has begun.

Its true! A Saiditor called me a faggot and now all do is think of enormous black cocks all day.

[–]bucetao6969[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

🤔

[–]ionlysaynigger 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

nigger

[–]weavilsatemyface 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

they aren't suited to a monogamous lifestyle

Nobody is suited to a monogamous lifestyle, especially not hetro men. Maybe one in a thousand couples are really, truly happy, and not one in a million couples has never thought even for a moment "I'm so over this bitch" (or prick, as the case may be).

Its enough to be satisfied in your relationship, and if even that fails, gays can fake it as well as het men can fake it.

[–]Canbot 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

schools will begin teaching kids how to have gay sex

Well that didn't age well. Literally the one bad thing on there that opponents of gay marraige may actually have said and it came true.

[–]jet199 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

And we have a guy on here right now actually arguing that it's a great thing.

[–]Canbot 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why are the conspiracy theories so accurate?

[–]bucetao6969[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

A lot of things opponents of gay marriage said would come true, actually came true.

Look at this shit 😂

[–]weavilsatemyface 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

It isn't gays who are teaching kids about anal. Gays are as mad about this shit as everyone else.

[–]Canbot 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

What is your point? How does that change the fact that conservatives were right?

[–]bucetao6969[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It's good to mention that specific group constantly gets flamed by a lot of gays and they only represent a minority within the homosexual minority.

[–]hfxB0oyA 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

s/AgedLikeMilk

[–]Gaslov 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

They'll move on to trying to recruit your kids like a drug dealer.

[–]Maggotus 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Here's the song they wrote about it...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ArOQF4kadHA

[–]Questionable 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

They look so oily.

[–]Alphix 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It works to some degree, too.

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Gay divorce lawyers will be there.

[–]bucetao6969[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Lesbian family court will be a sight to watch

[–]awdrifter 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

s/AgedLikeMilk

[–]jostiniane 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

There are a couple more:

  • fags will bang each others pooper and die with STDs
  • fags will adopt an actual human kid and make it miserable for the kid

Fags should be sent to Afghanistan, Taliban knows how to deal with them.

[–]weavilsatemyface 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

All of those things (apart from the first of course) would have happened regardless of marriage equality.

What will happen if Overwatch is released for the Playstation and XBox?

  • People will play Overwatch.
  • A war in Europe will break out.
  • A global plague.
  • Schools will teach kids that they can identify as a cat and how to have anal.
  • The US will send billions of dollars to Nazis while America falls apart.

[–]bucetao6969[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Bro... it's a meme. Of course these things didn't happen because of gay marriage.

[–]weavilsatemyface 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Of course these things didn't happen because of gay marriage.

You know that, and I know that, but the Big Brain nazis incels furiously shame-wanking over Yaoi manga in their mom's basement think that they did.

[–]bucetao6969[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They would have regardless if I posted the meme.

This wasn't posted in /s/politics, I posted it in /s/funny. People here commenting on the politics of it are just making the comments that unfortunately all of this came to fruition.