So I was having...Not really an argument, but shall we say a friendly disagreement with a friend of mine who was insisting that the whole idea of the "Sexual Spectrum" with straights at one end, gays at the other, and bisexuals of all stripes in between was a useful/accurate tool by which to measure sexuality.

Said friend changed the subject after not too long (because I was winning, hehe). But, I thought it worth going over some of the reasons why I think the whole sexual spectrum thing is so fucking useless, and why I wish it would JUST DIE ALREADY.

Point one: Sexual behaviour, Sexual desire, and self-identification of sexuality are all separate things, and there are numerous reasons why they will not all match up neatly. For example: the self-identified 'lesbians' who are married to men and talk about how much they love dick. Clearly there is a considerable mis-match between sexual behaviour and self-identification. Similarly, the lesbian who desires to exclusively be with women but is trapped in an unwanted relationship with a man. A 'spectrum line' can't capture these complexities.

Point two: There is no way to accurately assess where someone is on the 'spectrum' without taking into account a whole lot of complex social and political factors. Said friend gave the example of a woman who was 60% attracted to women, and 40% attracted to men, and should therefore be placed closer to the homosexual end of the spectrum, instead of the heterosexual end. But there are numerous reasons why such a person could, in reality, have a majority of relationships with men (or even only relationships with men), and would therefore not be well-positioned closer to the gay end of the spectrum.

Point three: And I think this is really the major one for me. It makes no sense to arbitrarily force people on a 'spectrum' when for many, their sexuality is not flexible or fluid. It may well be accurate to say that for 100% of the bisexual population, sexuality is a spectrum where they might tend more strongly towards homosexual or heterosexual desires (though that would still not necessarily translate neatly into what types of relationships they have). But for those who are fixed in their sexuality, they cannot be on a fucking spectrum. There is no 'lesbian spectrum', for example. Either you are exclusively attracted to women, or you are not a lesbian. Same goes for gay men and heterosexuals.

And it makes no sense to measure populations who have a fixed sexual orientation with the same tool that is used to measure those who have a flexible or varying sexual orientation. And we know that fixed sexual orientation is not a lie, because otherwise, conversion therapy would work. Also, despite a much freer environment in which people can explore their sexuality, the vast majority of people out there are still heterosexuals. We haven't seen massive rises where 40% or 50% of the population are suddenly discovering that they actually have gay or bisexual tendencies.

Said friend also gave the example of the autism spectrum as being a case where there's been in a change of thinking, e.g. autism used to be a very narrow diagnosis whereas now a 'spectrum' is used to assess people in terms of their autistic traits. Yeah, fine. But no one is putting non-autistic people on the autistic spectrum. It is a tool that is only used for the population with autism. Because it would be useless otherwise. (Which I said to said friend). I think the sexual spectrum is the same. It ONLY makes sense as a tool for that segment of the population who experience sexual fluidity. Keep it the fuck away from everyone else.