all 8 comments

[–]motionlessoracle 27 insightful - 1 fun27 insightful - 0 fun28 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You had me right up until you started talking about violence. The rest of your post opened my eyes to the realities faced by mothers of special needs children. I truly had never thought of it that way before. Mothers are blamed for their children in a way fathers never are.

However, since TIMs have appropriated the narrative that they are more at risk of violence and murder than everyone in the whole world, committing violence against them is a terrible plan. It plays right into their sense of righteous victimhood. What has been working for us is that TIMs shout about how evil TERFs are and how they need to die horribly but can't show many examples of women physically harming them. The dissonance wakes people up eventually. I think we should maintain the dissonance.

[–]Bogos 22 insightful - 1 fun22 insightful - 0 fun23 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

It’s pretty well established that older men are at higher risk for having autistic children, but I don’t think anyone gives a shit. Anyone who’s gone through child birth or even menstruated is going to be gender critical if they consider the implications for a second.

Trans women are trans women.

[–]Sittingonarainbow 22 insightful - 1 fun22 insightful - 0 fun23 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

At the base of it all, trans women are men.

[–]Aquadog 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Risks are very young or older parents.

[–]RoundFork 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

TRA supporters are just so fucking self-righteous about removing our language, I’ve never even considered the points of view from moms like you, and it’s so infuriating that their fetish justifications are replacing your avenues to talk about your lived experiences.

[–]MadLass 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I really wish youd edit that last part out. This is just going to be plastered somewhere how TeRFs really are tHreAtEniNg us.

BUT as a mom to a special needs son my heart literally started beating faster when you mentioned its always us that are blamed never the fathers. That really resonated with me especially as a single mom even I catch myself doing it and its an awful cycle. I feel your pain resources already fall short for us as women and mothers it makes me sick seeing them watered down further for men to live out fantasies.

[–]AdultFemaleHuman[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thank you. That’s how I feel too. Fathers are let off the hook, the moms are the ones who have to quit our careers and then do our best to provide therapy we aren’t trained to provide.

I still blame myself too even though I know it’s not logical.

I actually am just recovering from a bout of depression due to all the stress of being a special needs mom. I was hospitalized and had to stay in a mixed-sex ward. I was in a hallway just for women and lo and behold there was a TiM across the hall from me. The staff conducted room checks every 15 minutes and asked me to keep my door ajar (it was a locked ward with each room requiring key card access) and I said no way due to the presence of men on the ward, and a nurse had the audacity to say to me “but there are no men in your hallway.”

[–]Tikiri 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I’m a fellow ASD mom and I totally understand your anger and pain. However, I too would caution against saying that you’re willing to retaliate in kind to threats of violence by TiMs. This is because these people are known for doxxing anyone who merely disagrees with them, let alone give them a dose of their own medicine. And they’re not beyond “informing” people’s places of employment, their children’s schools, hell probably CPS for all I know, about someone’s thoughts on trans issues. It’s like a Police State (I live in a super-lefty area, so maybe that’s why I think this way). The whole TRA threat resonates with me in a way that’s particularly intense because I’m terrified my sweet, gentle son will somehow get “recruited” by them when he gets into Jr. High and further along. So many TiMs are on the spectrum and I always worry that they’ll convince my son that he’s one of them. This might seem irrational, but given how TiMs groom young people I don’t think it’s far fetched.