All: Is autogynephilia normal in natal women?

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[–]theory_of_thisan actual straight crossdresser 2 insightful - 8 fun2 insightful - 7 fun3 insightful - 8 fun -  (20 children)

Sure, I'm not a woman but obviously I live with what women desire which is masculinity.

You accept you express a form of masculinity, does that include sexuality?

[–]HouseplantWomen who disagree with QT are a different sex 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

obviously I live with what women desire which is masculinity.

Seriously. Just..don’t speak for women. It’s so easy and yet here you are explaining female sexuality as a man with a paraphilia. Gross.

[–]theory_of_thisan actual straight crossdresser 2 insightful - 8 fun2 insightful - 7 fun3 insightful - 8 fun -  (3 children)

But it's absurd not to see that. Saying women (the majority) find masculinity attractive is gross?

[–]MarkTwainiac 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Why are you so insistent on projecting your own obsession with "masculinity" and "femininity" (whatever those mean) onto everyone else? You really don't seem to understand that your own preoccupations & inclinations as a male with a particular fetish cannot be assumed to be true of the entire human race.

Your arrogant belief that because you fetishize "femininity" you somehow have insight into female sexuality & psychology is really tiresome, mate. And laughable.

[–]BiologyIsReal 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It's bold to suggest you have what all (or most) women want. You're a man. You can't extrapolate your sexual experiences with crossdresing and erotica to all (or any, really) women.

[–]HouseplantWomen who disagree with QT are a different sex 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It’s absurd for a man with a fetish to try and tell actual women about our own sexualities and inner workings.

Most find males attractive. Masculinity cannot be removed from men without radical change in how we socialise children. But go on, tell us more about our own desires and thoughts. You’re the self appointed expert on expert on what women think.

[–]MarkTwainiac 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I live with what women desire which is masculinity.

WTF?

[–]worried19 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I think theory means that he has to live with the fact that women desire masculinity, which he feels excludes him because he's a submissive straight crossdresser.

I don't think women even desire masculinity beyond male bodies, but most straight women are of course not going to be into crossdressing and their partner pretending to be a submissive woman in bed.

[–]MarkTwainiac 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I think what most women of all sexual orientations desire in partners/potential partners is the absence of negative qualities like creepiness, perviness, narcissism, arrogance, dishonesty, bossiness, bullying, coercion, solipsism etc and the presence of positive qualities like sense of humor, compassion, perspective, reasonableness, emotional maturity, equanimity, fairness, decency, resiliency, and again sense of humor.

As an older/elderly, mostly heterosexual woman with more sexual partners and experiences than I care to count, I have always been attracted to men with the physical traits of little body hair and no facial hair (beards & hairy backs are a total turn off to me); good teeth; shapely legs, wrists and forearms; broad shoulders; "cut" muscles; chiseled-featured faces; and hands & feet far more fine-boned and "delicate" looking than my own. Are all those signs of masculinity?

Also, most of the men I have been involved with have been foodies who are excellent cooks, well-educated, intelligent, emotionally sappy, well-informed about history, like to travel, and are interested art, music, architecture & science as well as in sports and outdoor pursuits like hiking, camping, biking, running, skiing, sailing & gardening. Are those signs of masculinity?

Many of the men I have been attracted to in my life have at points in their lives had long hair and wore eyeliner and rouge. Are those signs of masculinity?

[–]worried19 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

You've had a lot more experience in the romantic department than me. But I agree. Women in general seem to want stable, caring partners they can relate to and get along with, regardless of what they prefer physically.

[–]MarkTwainiac 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Just to be clear: I only have a lot more experience than you coz of my older age and the fact that I grew up in a different cultural milieu/era. But my greater IRL experiences do not necessarily endow me with greater insight than you, worried19.

[–]worried19 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (9 children)

I don't know what it means to have a masculine sexuality. I just consider my sexuality neutral. When I'm naked and involved in sex, the last thing I would be thinking about is society's gender roles.

[–]theory_of_thisan actual straight crossdresser 2 insightful - 7 fun2 insightful - 6 fun3 insightful - 7 fun -  (8 children)

I don't know what it means to have a masculine sexuality.

But you do think men are prescribed sex roles by society? That their pleasure is put before a woman's and that the male is the dominant pursuer. That is part of the popular fantasy. Isn't that what gc would say and that sex roles are bad?

That the popular role of masculinity within erotic popular with straight women show a particular kind of masculine sexuality, no?

[–]worried19 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

We've had this discussion before. You view all of sexuality through this weird BDSM lens that is very foreign to me. That's not how I was raised to think about sex.

Not all men are selfish and interested in their own pleasure first, nor are they all dominant pursuers of women. All gendered social roles are bad, but sex doesn't need to have anything to with society's roles. Sex is a pure and natural occurrence. Just bodies, no costumes.

So I don't know what it means to have a masculine sexuality. I have a high sex drive. I experience spontaneous desire. I am very visual. I am also very monogamous and not interested in fetishes.

[–]theory_of_thisan actual straight crossdresser 2 insightful - 7 fun2 insightful - 6 fun3 insightful - 7 fun -  (5 children)

But you see yourself as a minority among women.

Sex is influenced by society, within limits, and I'm skeptical of purity.

I definitely don't think of myself as the norm within men.

[–]worried19 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Whether I'm a minority in how I dress and cut my hair has nothing to do with sex.

Society can certainly twist a person's natural sexuality due to exposure to trauma and other things. But I don't think sexuality is naturally tied to society's gender crap. Just because a women willingly puts on makeup and a dress doesn't mean she wants to act like some porn star stereotype in bed.

[–]theory_of_thisan actual straight crossdresser 2 insightful - 6 fun2 insightful - 5 fun3 insightful - 6 fun -  (3 children)

If it isn't tied to society then why would changing society change sexual behaviour?

Surely there is a relationship but it's debatable what that is.

Would you say my deviancy is caused by society?

[–]worried19 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Sexuality is not naturally tied to society's gender crap, but society can twist a person's natural sexuality into something different.

Would you say my deviancy is caused by society?

That I don't know. I don't think you were born with a paraphilia. I think it developed due to something in the environment. But I really don't know anything about your life or childhood, so I can't speculate on what would have caused it.

[–]MarkTwainiac 9 insightful - 2 fun9 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Would you say my deviancy is caused by society?

It's so telling that this is the sort of thing theory keeps bringing up in a thread about

Is autogynephilia normal in natal women?

Everything is about him and his paraphilia. It's like he doesn't get the joke behind the famous lines, Enough about me. Now let's talk about you. What do you think of me?

[–]worried19 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I do actually find the general topic interesting. But he's just very focused on it even in unrelated contexts.

[–]MarkTwainiac 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That the popular role of masculinity within erotic popular with straight women show a particular kind of masculine sexuality, no?

This is genderist gibberish.