I torrented too much. Like click the magnet link and find out whats in it afterwards level of torrenting. Some CP went through the network and cops saw it. I was charged with possession of child pornography. I wanted to fight it but my lawyer (one of the few decent ones) convinced me rightly so that its a kangaroo court on this issue and I'd loose. Because they can charge pretty much anyway they want on that I could have faced a life sentence if I fought it and they adjusted the charges. Such is the retribution you receive if you don't take a plea deal. It really is compelled testimony and a violation of the 5th amendment. On the other hand taking a plea deal I was likely to get straight probation because of the inseverity of my case. I'm one of two people that lawyer has ever gotten straight probation on those charges for and he does this full time for a little over a decade in his current practice (such was the in inseverity of my case).

I still have a really really hard time finding work because of it.

On the second issue you raised, I am religious so I won't absolutely deny the possibility but I don't know anything about that. I think it has a lot more to do with attempting to reapproach subjects that caused trauma. They say that if you have ptsd from war that you should play first person shooters. Most people run from their trauma but they want to readdress it on their own schedule. I know one guy who when he was a kid his brother and his brother's friend made him suck their dicks. Years later he got charged with possession of child porn. He's a decent guy, and a father who never did anything to his own kids (there are polygraphs involved). I guess he wanted to feel some sense of familiarity with the subject that caused him trauma.