Target Launches New Kids' Clothing Line With Partner Ghislaine Maxwell. "Ghislaine Maxwell really embodies the spirit of what we stand for here at Target," said Target CEO Brian Cornell. "It's a match made in Heaven." The new line will be called "Lil' Groomers" and should hit shelves in June.

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Conservatives Claim Hitler’s Nazi Allegiance Greatly Exaggerated

submitted by neolib from theonion.com

Trump Condemned For Giving Platform To CNN. “It was dangerous, irresponsible, and downright disgusting for President Trump to provide CNN with a large national audience like that,” said media critic Greg Polinsky.

submitted by Chipit from theonion.com

According to media reports, there has been a horrific attack. As of now, it is unclear how bad the attack is, or whether anyone should care about it-- since authorities have not yet released the skin colors of the perpetrator and the victims.

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

College Freshman Explains Socialism To Cuban Who Escaped On A Raft. Brett is a college freshman. He knows all about socialism because his socialist professor told him all about it. And he's ready to share his knowledge with a man who escaped socialism on a raft.

submitted by Chipit from youtube.com

Shocking Study Shows More Kids Identifying As Members Of World’s Most Celebrated, Popular Group. "Every single movie, TV show, corporation, TikTok influencer, YouTuber, public school teacher, pop star, and Hollywood star in the country openly promotes and celebrates this group."

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Everything Californians Should Know Before Moving To Texas. Are you moving to Texas from California? There are a few cultural differences you need to be aware of! Presented by Steve and Timpani from our hit Californians Move to Texas web series.

submitted by Chipit from youtube.com

Why Internet drama never ends

submitted by jet199 from vm.tiktok.com

Women's History Month Canceled For Implying There Is Such A Thing As 'Women'

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Sex Positive Dad Meets Your Girlfriend. Cassidy is brave going for that handshake, because he didn't wash his hands.

submitted by Chipit from youtube.com

War-Weary Americans Not Sure How Much Longer They Can Occasionally Glance At Headlines About Ukraine

submitted by neolib from theonion.com

Kamala Disappointed To Learn President In Hospice Is Just Carter

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Meghan Markle 'upset and overwhelmed by her depiction on South Park'

submitted by Chipit from dailymail.co.uk

President Biden Arrives In Kyiv For His Performance Review

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Criminal Caught After Cutting Off 37 Man Buns In One Day, Claims He “Was Doing The Lord’s Work”

submitted by jet199 from dailynewsreported.com

Mainstream Media Dooped by Parody Claim: Aretha Franklin's "Natural Woman" is Offensive (10:36) ~ Clyde Do Something

submitted by JasonCarswell from youtube.com

Yoda Announces Pronouns Are Him/He

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

American Patriots Dump Harry And Meghan Into Boston Harbor. The protest, dubbed "Boston Tea Party Part 2: Rebel Even Harder," saw American protesters seize the royal couple and dump them right into the sea.

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Please Help Cops Get Away With Murder - The Fraternal Order Of Pansies

submitted by Drewski from odysee.com

Caitlin Johnstone: Good Thing Biden Beat Trump

submitted by [deleted] from consortiumnews.com

Megan Merkel is a heroic role model

submitted by jet199 from youtu.be

Andrew Tate fan devastated

submitted by jet199 from twitter.com

Pretty girl problems

submitted by jet199 from vm.tiktok.com

Journalists Warn Of Frightening Trend Where Rules Apply To Them. The troubling trend came to a head this past week as several journalists who had endangered a man's life were then made to endure a Twitter suspension, just like any other person.

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Disinformation Down 92% As NYT Writers Go On Strike

submitted by carn0ld03 from babylonbee.com

Sigourney Weaver Thanks Jennifer Lawrence For Paving The Way For Female Action Heroes

submitted by carn0ld03 from babylonbee.com

Gender studies graduates

submitted by carn0ld03 from u.smutty.horse

Californians Move to Texas FINALE | Episode 6: Return To California. Steve and Timpani have been through their fair share of trials since moving to Texas, but they're about to face their greatest challenge yet: returning to California.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Titania McGrath: It is no exaggeration to say that Elon Musk’s annexation of Twitter is the most terrifying development in recent history. It is a testament to the cool-headed stoicism of left-wing journalists that they have managed not to overreact.

submitted by Chipit from thecritic.co.uk

Baal, the ancient Mesopotamian deity described in scripture and demonological textbooks such as Pseudomonarchia Daemonum has distanced itself from Balenciaga after the company's recent scandal.

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Nation Relieved To No Longer Have To Pretend To Like Soccer. "Hoo-boy, I didn't think I could keep that up another day," said local man Aaron Bronson. "Thank God for the Dutch!"

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

White men question how hateful they are

submitted by Vulptex from youtube.com

Guy Who Decided To Ban The Babylon Bee Wondering If He Might Be In Hot Water

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

What is Christian Nationalism?

submitted by Vulptex from youtube.com

Californians Move to Texas | Episode 3: The Church. Everyone's favorite transplants from California, Steve and Timpani, are going door to door trying to get their new Texas neighbors to vote for Beto O'Rourke. And then, plot twist, they end up in a good old-fashioned Baptist church!

submitted by Chipit from youtube.com

Babylon Bee Won't Back Down Over Trans Joke Twitter Ban (47:35) ~ ReasonTV

submitted by JasonCarswell from youtube.com

Californians Adjust To New Life In Texas. This couple left California due to the cost of living, crime, taxes, etc. etc. etc. But now they're not so sure they can get used to living in Texas!

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

FBI Drops Investigation After Discovering Trump's Top Secret Nuclear Documents Were Just Print-Outs Of Hillary Clinton Emails

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Peaceful Protest or Insurrection: The Game Show! Play the game show where you look at a picture and guess if it's from a peaceful protest or a dangerous insurrection. It's pretty much what it sounds like.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Saruman Breeds Army Of 87,000 More Tax Collectors

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

The Conservative Mutiny (parody of the Caine Mutiny, about UK politics)

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

IDF Soldier Recounts Harrowing, Heroic War Story Of Killing 8-Month-Old Child

submitted by Chipit from theonion.com

Joe Biden issued an apology to the American people for an embarrassing blunder: "As President, the buck stops with me, pause for dramatic effect. Earlier, I read the wrong words in the teleprompter, don't say telecommuter or helicopter. I apologize for my latest teleprompter gaffe, end apology."

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Ghislaine Maxwell Sentenced To Prison In Spite Of Years Of Faithful Service To Nation's Leaders

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Satan Responds To Roe v. Wade Overturn. Satan held a press conference today responding to the big loss of Roe v. Wade. He's doing his best to keep his chin up.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

California Dad vs Immigrant Dad. “All religions are very bad. Except for Muslims, fine. And if Chinese people have a religion, that's fine. When black people do Christianity, that’s okay too.” Hahahaha

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Weird: Democrats Suddenly Saying 'Woman' Today As If Everyone Knows What It Means. Democrats nationwide have been accusing the Supreme Court of taking rights from "women." Onlookers have confirmed this to be confusing, as it seems to suggest that Democrats do in fact know what a woman is.

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

BREAKING: Roe v. Wade Was Just Overturned - Here's What You Need To Know

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Amazon Creates Online Looting App To Allow The Timid To Loot From Home

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Thomas the Tank Engine has been branded a ‘fucking scab’ by his colleagues today after turning up for work on time as normal and refusing to go on strike.

submitted by Chipit from newsthump.com

Companies Strangely Silent On Pride Month In The Middle East

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Every Bay Area House Party. “I don’t think saying ‘we should be able to unperson whoever we want’ helps your case that this is valuable and non-creepy.’ "And how many others were dissuaded from murder or other abominable acts because of the fear of erasure? And now that tool is lost to us forever.”

submitted by Chipit from astralcodexten.substack.com

The US Ministry of Truth is Watching You || Tony Kinnett (12:26) ~ Alison Morrow [ Oderint dum metuant. = Let them hate as long as they fear. ]

submitted by JasonCarswell from youtube.com

Government Disinformation Board Determines All Criticism Of Government Disinformation Board To Be Disinformation

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Mordor Did Nothing Wrong | The Lord of The Rings From Mordor's Perspective. It's uncomfortably close to how certain of our political and social groups present the Western world.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

BLM Leaders Call For Renewed Protests This Summer After Finding A Fantastic Beach House For Sale On Zillow

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

You know things are bad when Saudi TV stations are running up the score with punishing satire against you. All those subsidies and helping them slaughter Yemenis and this is what the US gets in return LOL.

submitted by Chipit from i.imgur.com

Oh No! Noah Accidentally Fills Ark With Only Male Animals Because He's Not A Biologist

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Zelensky reminds every American to do their taxes so that he will get paid

submitted by Drewski from genesiustimes.com

Cracker Jack Changes Name To Less Offensive Caucasian Jack

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Nazgûl With Normal Voices. In this episode, the Witch King and his boiiz show those mmmMEN!

submitted by Chipit from youtube.com

F-14s vs MiG-28s - May 1986, a Danger Zone in the Indian Ocean. I remember this engagement. Voodoo 3 sure had great balls of fire.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Prime Time Stein 99 Appears in a Canadian Government Meeting (4:48) ~ Clyde Do Something

submitted by JasonCarswell from youtube.com

SCOTUS nominee Ketanji Brown Jackson brings a biologist with her every time she goes to the bathroom to tell her which one to use

submitted by AXXA from genesiustimes.com

Lockheed Martin CEO Tearfully Urges U.S. To Implement No-Fly Zone In Ukraine

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

The villainy of J.K. Rowling | Titania McGrath | The Critic Magazine. Rowling is dog-whistling to her transphobic followers by writing the exact opposite of what she thinks.

submitted by Chipit from thecritic.co.uk

This woman is an angry feminist -- but she's quickly changing her tune as World War 3 starts and she faces the possibility of getting drafted.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Government of Canada PSA - Masking Children (0:30)

submitted by JasonCarswell from youtube.com

Retired army Major sets off for the Ukraine on his mobility scooter.

submitted by jet199 from bazake.co.uk

Media Says Spike In Myocarditis May Be Linked To Ukraine Crisis

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Liam Neeson Offers To Negotiate With Putin (5:30) ~ The Jimmy Dore Show

submitted by JasonCarswell from rumble.com

Hitler phones Biden again. The scary thing is, the scenes with Hitler are played by actors, the scenes with a senile old fake President are not.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

So many people fell for this one.

submitted by jet199 from imgur.com

Biden Administration Begins Grueling, Months-Long Process Of Abandoning Americans In Ukraine

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Queen Elizabeth Asked If She's Taken Ivermectin For COVID, Responds With Definitive ‘Neigh’

submitted by IkeConn from babylonbee.com

After Legitimizing China, International Olympic Committee Narrows Down Choice For Next Olympics To Iran, North Korea, Or Canada

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Join Klovbar the Strong and his co-host Willis as these two Lord of the Rings geeks exclusively reveal these 9 new woke characters from Amazon's new Lord of the Rings show: The Rings of Power.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Shame: Elon Musk Donates $5.7 Billion To Charity Even Though The Government Could Have Used It To Fill 7 Potholes

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Hot on the heels of their suppression of several episodes of the Joe Rogan Experience, Spotify has banned these 11 songs for containing harmful misinformation. Not good! "It Doesn't Matter If You're Black Or White" by Michael Jackson. Oh, it matters. It's the most important thing about you.

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

GoFundMe Freezes Funds For Child's Heart Surgery After Finding Out He Supports Trucker Protest

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Here’s The Boat That Won’t Bring Jeff Bezos’s Hair, Or Wife Back

submitted by [deleted] from jalopnik.com

They hate our slavery

submitted by jet199 from imgur.com

While Watching 'The View' In Hell, Hitler Surprised To Learn Holocaust Wasn't About Race

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Biden Promises To Replace Retiring Quarterback Tom Brady With A Woman Of Color

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Biden To Nominate Progressive Woman Of Color Elizabeth Warren To Supreme Court

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

With Train Robberies, No Electricity, No Gasoline Automobiles, California Tries Rebranding With Vintage Old West Theme

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Dunkirk with Star Wars Music. George Lucas said that when creating the dogfighting sequences in 1977's "STAR WARS", he took much inspiration from classic World War II films. So I overlaid some of John William's "TIE FIGHTER ATTACK" unto a dogfighting scene from the 2017 film "DUNKIRK."

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Murderer Undecided On Whether He'll Follow New Gun Laws

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Democrats warn that Republicans plan to steal election by blocking Democrat efforts to steal election

submitted by AXXA from babylonbee.com

Joss Whedon Fails to Explain Controversy to His Girlfriend After Realizing 'Buffy' Came Out Before She Was Born

submitted by Chipit from hard-drive.net

Supreme Court Sets Dangerous Precedent Of Letting The American People Make Medical Decisions For Themselves

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

Legal Experts Ask Justice Sotomayor To Recuse Herself From Case Due To Her Being An Idiot

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

Unvaccinated Man Feeling Left Out As All His Vaccinated Friends Have COVID

submitted by Chipit from youtu.be

FBI Promises To Make Hoaxes Less Obvious This Year

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Vaccinated denied treatment for overwhelming hospitals

submitted by AXXA from babylonbee.com

Businesses Now Requiring Positive COVID Test As Proof Of Vaccination

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

Drakeford announces dogging can resume from Monday

submitted by jet199 from walesoncraic.com

AOC Lays Wreath At Her Grave On January 6th

submitted by Drewski from babylonbee.com

After Conviction For Sex Crimes, Ghislaine Maxwell Announces New Job At CNN

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt

submitted by Chipit from babylonbee.com

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