Andrew Tate fan devastated by jet199 in Satire

[–]Airbus320 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Nigger tate

Pretty girl problems by jet199 in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The hot girl from my high school is now an old maid. She thought she was too good for us. Now she alone and ignored.

Gender studies graduates by carn0ld03 in Satire

[–]UncleWillard56 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Ahhh gender studies. A humanities class trying to pass as social science.

Guy Who Decided To Ban The Babylon Bee Wondering If He Might Be In Hot Water by Chipit in Satire

[–]Chipit[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Let's remember that the Babylon Bee getting banned is what made Elon Musk angry enough to buy Twitter.

What is Christian Nationalism? by Vulptex in Satire

[–]jet199 4 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

I don't think I'd ever heard of Christian Nationalism until 2 weeks ago.

Just another buzz word like white supremacy they can shout at people when they don't have any actual arguments to make and smear people they don't like without any evidence of wrongdoing.

Needless to say Socks was using the term unironically by 2 weeks minus 1 day ago.

Weird: Democrats Suddenly Saying 'Woman' Today As If Everyone Knows What It Means. Democrats nationwide have been accusing the Supreme Court of taking rights from "women." Onlookers have confirmed this to be confusing, as it seems to suggest that Democrats do in fact know what a woman is. by Chipit in Satire

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah, but a lot of them are also correcting those ones and saying "men can get pregnant too!" "Please use inclusive terms such as 'birthing people' and 'people with uteruses'!" The left is divided into classic Dems, and gender people. Well, it's more like a Venn diagram than a true divide, but still.

Weird: Democrats Suddenly Saying 'Woman' Today As If Everyone Knows What It Means. Democrats nationwide have been accusing the Supreme Court of taking rights from "women." Onlookers have confirmed this to be confusing, as it seems to suggest that Democrats do in fact know what a woman is. by Chipit in Satire

[–]ShekelPa 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Exact same strategy they use for antisemitism. They go out of their way to never define what it actually is. They do this so that they can kill off the momentum of any opposition by claiming they are against something that they purposefully refuse to define so they can rely on the plausibility.

BREAKING: Roe v. Wade Was Just Overturned - Here's What You Need To Know by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The perfect poison pill to discourage lefties from moving to red states.

Government Disinformation Board Determines All Criticism Of Government Disinformation Board To Be Disinformation by Chipit in Satire

[–]x0x7 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

They've also determined that any claim that their actions are a violation of the 1st Amendment are also disinformation.

So many people fell for this one. by jet199 in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

In Kazakhstan they burnt down their parliament. It was an insurrection. All media outlets who said Jan 6 was an insurrection should be shut down and their journalists jailed.

Biden Administration Begins Grueling, Months-Long Process Of Abandoning Americans In Ukraine by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The military brass declined to help secure the evacuation as they were busy making popcorn while watching cool bombers fly over Taiwan.

Well thats an awkwardly accurate prediction....Taiwan warns Chinese aircraft in its air defence zone

After Legitimizing China, International Olympic Committee Narrows Down Choice For Next Olympics To Iran, North Korea, Or Canada by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Disappointed that Australia isnt on the list. They really need to step up their oppression game if they want to get on the list of the pandemic games.

After Legitimizing China, International Olympic Committee Narrows Down Choice For Next Olympics To Iran, North Korea, Or Canada by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

It may be the BB but they are probably not far from the truth.

GoFundMe Freezes Funds For Child's Heart Surgery After Finding Out He Supports Trucker Protest by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That poor, poor child. Aw Lawd Hep Us.

Biden Promises To Replace Retiring Quarterback Tom Brady With A Woman Of Color by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 4 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

And I just want to tell you, I know you’re a little younger than I am, but, you know, I’ve adopted the attitude of the great Negro — at the time, quarterback in the Negro Leagues — went on to become a great quarterback in the pros — in the National Football League after Tom Brady. Her name was Kamala Harris.
She could easily handle an entire football team and was great with balls - I cant write this this is too mean

Biden Promises To Replace Retiring Quarterback Tom Brady With A Woman Of Color by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Im also laughing like a madman

Biden Promises To Replace Retiring Quarterback Tom Brady With A Woman Of Color by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

If I had been drinking a beer when I read this half of it would be coming out my nose right now.

Biden To Nominate Progressive Woman Of Color Elizabeth Warren To Supreme Court by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Its about time a Native American was nominated to the Supreme Court! No one is more native than Fauxcahontas!

With Train Robberies, No Electricity, No Gasoline Automobiles, California Tries Rebranding With Vintage Old West Theme by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If only they would stay in California and not bring their blue lefty shitstained drawers here.

Biden To Nominate Progressive Woman Of Color Elizabeth Warren To Supreme Court by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Well isn't that special.

Biden To Nominate Progressive Woman Of Color Elizabeth Warren To Supreme Court by Chipit in Satire

[–]AXXA 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Are you sure? We need to see who she voted for. If she didn't vote for Biden then she ain't black.

Unvaccinated Man Feeling Left Out As All His Vaccinated Friends Have COVID by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Poor guy. Well at least he doesn't have Covid penis.

AOC Lays Wreath At Her Grave On January 6th by Drewski in Satire

[–]JasonCarswell 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

You could fuck her with anger.
You could fuck her with a bullet.
You could fuck her with a cucumber.
You could fuck her with a deepfaked scandal.
You could fuck her with eugenics.
You could fuck her with a financial scam.
You could fuck her with a glory hole.
You could fuck her with a hysterectomy.
You could fuck her with information overload.
You could fuck her with a jackhammer.
You could fuck her with a lead pipe, in at least two ways.
You could fuck her with a media campaign.
You could fuck her with nanobots and/or poison.
You could fuck her with an octopus.
You could fuck her with a pussy pounding of preposterous proportions.
You could fuck her with a quiet rage.
You could fuck her with a rebel yell.
You could fuck her with secret society exposure.
You could fuck her with a teen prostitute sex video.
You could fuck her with an umbrella from Uganda.
You could fuck her with vehicular manslaughter.
You could fuck her with windowpane acid.
You could fuck her with X-rays and 5G.
You could fuck her with a yellow double ended dildo.
You could fuck her with a zebra.

AOC Lays Wreath At Her Grave On January 6th by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

No, with my pecker. What else would I use to fuck her.

AOC Lays Wreath At Her Grave On January 6th by Drewski in Satire

[–]JasonCarswell 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

With /u/Anger?

AOC Lays Wreath At Her Grave On January 6th by Drewski in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

She never had any integrity. or intelligence. Ocasio-Cortez Calls Migrant Detention Centers ‘Concentration Camps,’ Eliciting Backlash

WASHINGTON — Representative Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the liberal freshman Democrat from New York who has made fighting for immigrants’ rights a signature issue, on Tuesday described the Trump administration’s border detention facilities as “concentration camps,” provoking backlash from Republicans who said she was minimizing the Holocaust. “This administration has established concentration camps on the southern border of the United States for immigrants, where they are being brutalized with dehumanizing conditions and dying,” Ms. Ocasio-Cortez wrote on Twitter, amplifying comments she had made on her Instagram feed on Monday night. “This is not hyperbole. It is the conclusion of expert analysis,” she added, citing an article in Esquire magazine that quoted a historian of the Holocaust who lectures at the University of Virginia. In the article, the historian, Waitman Wade Beorn, said, “Things can be concentration camps without being Dachau or Auschwitz.”

AOC Lays Wreath At Her Grave On January 6th by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I'd fuck her.

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt by Chipit in Satire

[–]JasonCarswell 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I bet there are plenty who would care enough to reject them both with such a statement.

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt by Chipit in Satire

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

i guess only people that would buy it are those who dislike both . . . just a small minority, most have picked a side

There are many who just don't care about politics but they wouldn't buy such a shirt

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt by Chipit in Satire

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

no this story on babylon bee is the truth

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt by Chipit in Satire

[–]JasonCarswell 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

How about making T-shirts that say both to indicate it's all bullshit?:

F--- Trump and

let's go Brandon!

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Staged.

'I Just Think This Let's Go Brandon Thing Is Really Disrespectful,' Says Man Wearing FUCK TRUMP T-Shirt by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tiwaking 4 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Bwahahahaha!

"I dunno... I just don't think we should be disrespecting the President of the United States like that," said local Democrat Camden Spudfuffle, who at the time was wearing a "F--- Trump" t-shirt. "We should always respect our leaders, even if we don't always agree with them. I think it's always important to remain dignified in our speech and treatment of public servants. I have never disrespected anyone!"

Spudfuffle then caught a glimpse of Trump on a nearby TV screen and shrieked at the sky before attacking the TV with a baseball bat while screaming obscenities.

Danny Zuko told to self-isolate after reporting multiplying chills by carn0ld03 in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Woman Who’s Good At Driving Wondering If She Might Be Transgender by Drewski in Satire

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

hahaha total savagery

More actors shot into space than Space Force personnel: Report by carn0ld03 in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm glad they didn't call their people "Space Man" like the Air Force calls them "Air Man".

Danny Zuko told to self-isolate after reporting multiplying chills by carn0ld03 in Satire

[–]Chipit 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I added this song to my award-winning playlist recently. It's not for general use, you have to have the right crowd and the right timing. But boy does it rock the house when it hits.

Cruel: Jussie Smollett Will Be Forced To Share A Jail Cell With His Attacker by jet199 in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'd put him in with a skunk.

Cruel: Jussie Smollett Will Be Forced To Share A Jail Cell With His Attacker by jet199 in Satire

[–]Airbus320 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Scary

Bob Dole Switches To Democrat Party by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

He registered to vote in all 50 states the other day after he died.

Joe Rogan on Gollum from Lord of the Rings by Chipit in Satire

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

in hebrew golem means dumb or helpless, tolkien was based, also where the word goy comes from

Prosecutors Find Mail-In Jury Votes At 3AM, Rittenhouse Now Guilty by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The lefties would try it if they could.

Rittenhouse, Sandmann Agree To Share Joint Custody Of CNN by Chipit in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sadly neither one of these guys will ever get laid.

Psaki Says High Gas Prices Are Good Because Americans Will Be Forced To Drive Greener Flintstones Cars by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sometimes satire is down right scary accurate.

Wife Throws Away Incredibly Specific Adapter Cable You've Held On To For 7 Years Right Before You Suddenly Find A Use For It by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I actually came across and old serial cable for a Cisco Router the other day in a junk box. I haven't needed one for 10 or more years and do not see ever needing it again but I couldn't throw it away.

Liberal Parent Trying To Figure Out How To Cheer For His Son Brandon by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 4 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

In 6 years the schools will be overrun with little Brandons.

Leftists Upset As Business Refuses To Discriminate by Drewski in Satire

[–]hennaojichan 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Panties twisted all over Cali

Australian Hospitals Over Capacity With People Beaten By Police For Not Wearing Masks by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I wear a mask to protect myself from facial recognition. Not Covid-19.

Biden: 'We Can Return To Normal When 3.5 Trillion Americans Have Been Vaccinated' by Drewski in Satire

[–]mahavishnunj 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

i wont be satisfied until its 12 trillion.

Joe Biden Announces Civil War by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It begins and Biden can't stop it now. People will quit before they take the vaxx. Shitloads of them.

Joe Rogan Criticized As 'Anti-Science' For Surviving COVID by Drewski in Satire

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The Buddha say, fewer Joe Rogans in the world would be good.

Joe Rogan Criticized As 'Anti-Science' For Surviving COVID by Drewski in Satire

[–]Dippy_Dipshizzle 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Confucius say, better to be cured by anti-science, than to be killed by science.

Crowd Lays Down Path Of MyPillows As Trump Triumphantly Rides Donkey Into D.C. by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Sometimes one of their articles is so on the money it could almost be fact.

Pelosi Says She Will Arrest Any Congressperson Caught With Copy Of The Constitution by Drewski in Satire

[–]IkeConn 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Too bad this could become reality.

Fauci Calls The Bill Of Rights A 'Public Health Crisis' by Drewski in Satire

[–]FuckMasks 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Fauci & gates are the public health crisis.

Democrats Propose Requiring Vaccine Passports For Voting by Drewski in Satire

[–]BananaMan76 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Oh thank goodness this was from the bee. For a second there I thought it was real and the Demonrats were setting up a fraudulent elec- oh wait, that already happened...

A U.S. Senator has made what some are calling “an embarrassing mistake” after he shared a New York Times article on Twitter, apparently unaware that The New York Times is a popular fake news site. It is a well-known publication that started as a newspaper but has switched to satire in recent years. by Chipit in Satire

[–]Tom_Bombadil 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

A knock off of some epic The Onion.

https://www.usnews.com/news/articles/2012/11/27/the-onion-fools-top-chinese-newspaper-the-onion-dupes-china-again

Chinese paper runs with satirical story naming North Korean dictator "sexiest man alive."

The satirical publication has fooled its share of government officials. In February, Republican Rep. John Fleming of Louisiana posted a link to an Onion story headlined "Planned Parenthood Opens $8 Billion Abortionplex" to his own Facebook page.

This is also not its first time victimizing China. In 2002, the Beijing Evening News fell for an Onion story claiming congressmen were considering building a new Capitol building in Memphis, Tenn., or Charlotte, N.C., for better parking and more bathrooms.

Congress Threatens To Leave D.C. Unless New Capitol Is Built

Demonstrating its commitment to "stay in Washington if at all possible," Congress has invited more than a dozen architectural firms to submit proposals for a new D.C. capitol. Among the early favorites is the ambitiously titled "Halls Of Power," a retro-futuristic design by the Kansas City architectural firm of Hellmuth, Obata, and Kassabaum. The Halls Of Power would feature a retractable rotunda for daytime sessions, a Dancing Waters fountain in the front courtyard, and 55 more luxury boxes than the current building.

Oh, the Halcyon days...

Killed in his sleep for being a woke cunt by jet199 in Satire

[–]JasonCarswell 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Killed in his sleep for being a woke cunt by jet199 in Satire

[–]cumguzzler 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Am I supposed to feel god or bad? I feel a little bit bad that this made me laugh and I'm slightly happy that there is one less fucktard in the world

Killed in his sleep for being a woke cunt by jet199 in Satire

[–]Tom_Bombadil 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Is that two photos of the same person's face?

The one on the right might have a photoshopped head and someone else's adams apple. The chin shadow ends at the neck.

It's a funny idea.

Killed in his sleep for being a woke cunt by jet199 in Satire

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Fair dinkum I say, fair dinkum!

AOC Claims She Was Killed In The Capitol Riots And Is Now A Ghost by Drewski in Satire

[–]magnora7 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Imagine if all congresspeople were ghosts, and there's no term limits... talk about a shadow government haha

AOC Claims She Was Killed In The Capitol Riots And Is Now A Ghost by Drewski in Satire

[–]jet199 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I imagine she'd come back as more like one of those Dusk til Dawn vampires.

Omar, Tlaib Support Capitol Riots After Learning They’re Like Kristallnacht - The Mideast Beast by Sw0rdofDam0cles in Satire

[–]pcpmasterrace 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Synagogues were the only sort of establishment spared from the riots.

Biden To Be Sworn In On Copy Of The Communist Manifesto by Sw0rdofDam0cles in Satire

[–]bobbobbybob 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

had to check this was satire

Omar, Tlaib Support Capitol Riots After Learning They’re Like Kristallnacht - The Mideast Beast by Sw0rdofDam0cles in Satire

[–]bjam27 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

The BLM riots were very similar to Kristallnacht, BLM even targeted Jewish Centers and Synagogues.

Peacefully protesting your Govt at the seat of govt and asking for fair elections is the opposite of Kristallnacht.

Electoral College Successfully Overturned, Buffalo Guy Selected As President by Drewski in Satire

[–]nolivesmatter 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Nice try Xi

Archaeologists uncover corpse of Roman staff officer at Pompeii desk by Sw0rdofDam0cles in Satire

[–]hennaojichan 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The pyroclastic flow was so rapid that guards were found still standing at their posts (petrified?) and couples found in bed frozen in the act of love.

Scientists Anxious To Study The Majestic Nocturnal Ballot Which Only Comes Out At 4 am by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]hennaojichan 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Nocturnal submissions

Hollywood Actor Outed As Conservative After Being A Decent Human Being by Drewski in Satire

[–]Iam1ofMany 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The Bee never disappoints.

After A Lot Of Prayer, Nancy Pelosi Tearfully Instructs Doctors To Pull The Plug On Trump (And Pence) by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 3 fun1 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

“As a woman so devoted to my Catholic faith, I know the Quran tells us to be compassionate,” Pelosi explained. “So it’s with a heavy heart we say goodbye to Donald Trump and Mike Pence in due time. But definitely before lunch. I have a blowout at two.”

Liberals Desperately Pray For Trump's Healing After Realizing Mike Pence Next In Line For Presidency by Drewski in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Amen.

Broadcast Signal Accidentally Picks Up Two Old Men Yelling At Each Other Instead Of Presidential Debate by Drewski in Satire

[–]BadSprocket 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Something is amiss, everyone I know got the same nursing home broadcast.

Winning Debate Strategy: Trump Announces He Will Simply Let Joe Biden Talk For The Full 90 Minutes | The Babylon Bee by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Trump says he will simply go on stage and say, "I cede my time to Joe Biden," before calmly sitting down and watching in delight as Biden tries to maintain coherence for nearly two hours.

"It's a genius move, frankly," said one political analyst. "There's some real 4D chess going on over there in the White House. Or perhaps 7D Axis & Allies, or even 17D Diplomacy. The Biden campaign simply isn't operating on Trump's level."

Democrats: 'Without Abortion, Women Might Have To Settle For Having 7 Kids And Sitting On The Highest Court In The Land' | The Babylon Bee by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

"Look how happy and powerful she looks," said Butterwiggles. "It's disgusting! Everyone knows it's literally impossible to have a life worth living unless you kill all your kids to please the CEO of your supply chain company in order to have a healthy 401K!"

Datazucc, Part 1 [deepfake] (2:35) ~ Futuring Machine by JasonCarswell in Satire

[–]JasonCarswell[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Datazucc, Part 2 [deepfake] (2:40) ~ Futuring Machine, Aug 3, 2020

See also:
Another Top 10 Deepfake Videos (10:30) ~ , Nov 4, 2019

Biden: 'It's Ridiculous To Say I Use A Teleprompter And Your PC Ran Into A Problem And Needs To Restart' | The Babylon Bee by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

When Biden was asked about whether or not he uses a teleprompter, he answered, “It's ridiculous to say I use a teleprompter and your PC ran into a problem and needs to restart. We're just collecting some error info, and then we'll restart for you.” Biden then softened his tone a bit. “C’mon, man. Initiating TeleMatic boot sequence. Beginning demo mode. Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua.”

Remaining Liberal Justices Given Pink Slips As Trump Reduces Court Size | The Babylon Bee by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Instead of going through the expensive headache of confirming a new justice to replace Ginsburg, Trump will now reduce the number of justices on the Supreme Court by four. This means that in addition to not appointing a successor to Ginsburg, three more justices needed to get the boot. Trump said he pulled the names at random from a hat. “Totally random, but not really,” he said.

OPED: I was raped by whoever Trump picks to replace Ginsburg on the Supreme Court by HegeMoney in Satire

[–]redditsabsenteedad 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Give it a week after a name is picked and there will be at least one woman who says that nominee raped her. Just because the media runs with it at full speed and psychopathic intensity and it takes weeks or months for the story to be found unsubstantiated bullshit and fade into the memory hole, doesn't make it any less of a fucking joke.

OPED: I was raped by whoever Trump picks to replace Ginsburg on the Supreme Court by HegeMoney in Satire

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

tell fellow women to stop lying, it hurts real rape victims. more than 50% of accusations are lies. Rape is rare tho when it does happen it is terrible. Getting drunk and regretting it doesn't count.

OPED: I was raped by whoever Trump picks to replace Ginsburg on the Supreme Court by HegeMoney in Satire

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

was it in 1982

OPED: I was raped by whoever Trump picks to replace Ginsburg on the Supreme Court by HegeMoney in Satire

[–]HegeMoney[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Every controversial topic is manipulated into a sacred cow by morons like yourself.

The hypocrisy is self-incriminating.

This strategy is backfiring.

Hope your proud of yourself.

OPED: I was raped by whoever Trump picks to replace Ginsburg on the Supreme Court by HegeMoney in Satire

[–]flush_the_turd 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Rape is really funny isn't it? Nice way to demean all the women who were actually raped for a stupid joke. Hope your proud of yourself.

Democrats Furious President Trump Made The US Postal Service Incompetent For Last 25 Years by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]DIMP 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Here's a way to make the POSTAL SERVICE more competent!

Get rid of all the mail boxes!!!!!

That'll teach 'em...

Californians Begin Painting Lamb's Blood On Doorposts Just To Be On The Safe Side by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Californians were seen taking the blood and painting it over their doorposts in an attempt to avoid whatever God's next planned plague for the state is. The citizens of the left-coast hellscape said they fear God may next send locusts, frogs, festering boils, or an angel of Death to kill their firstborn fur baby. But whatever horrors God has planned for California, they want to be ready.

Academy Strips 'Schindler's List' Of Best Picture Award Due To Lack Of Diversity | The Babylon Bee by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 2 insightful - 4 fun2 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

"Schindler's List would have been a great movie if it just had a dozen transgendered characters," said Le'Jon de Froofroo, spokesperson for the Academy. "As it is, there are just a bunch of Jews and Germans -- very privileged races."

ChickFila HR Department by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]insta 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Here we see a comedian self censor over a joke about self-identifying gender. A whole video picking fun at a religious company but don't you dare joke about someone protected leftist cause. Pathetic.

Upping The Ante: Protesters Now Attempting To Stop High-Speed Freight Trains | The Babylon Bee by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Black lives splatter.

Journalists Rush To Get Story Out Before It Can Be Ruined By The Facts by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

"This is a powerful narrative. Just the kind of story we want to tell! But we have to get this out before the facts come out! Hurry! The facts are closing in!" screamed a CNN reporter as he jumped in his news van to rush over to the site of the incident.

Tucker Carlson Tonight Added To Many Homeschool Curriculums by christnmusicreleases in Satire

[–]christnmusicreleases[S] 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Update: Many parents are finding that flipping on Jake Tapper is a great way to kick-off recess, as the children will quickly sprint outside to get as far from the television set as possible.