People who are gullible tend to focus on and remember the negative (and exaggerate it) more often. He sounds like one of those. Also a tourist.

"Misgendering" is not a universal law. I mean sure, come here and watch and then go whine about how we are bad when in fact we're just not playing along.

It's an unsophisticated take from an unsophisticated person who either didn't spend enough time here or just isn't ready to cope with the amount of nuance and gray that is inherent in contemplating this whole mess. It can't be distilled to something black-and-white.

That's the entire problem. The TRA world wants things to be in stark contrast to one another and they'll lie as much as it takes to persuade others of this.

Completely disingenuous, childish, ignorant take. It smells like what an insecure enabler does. Who cares if we are blunt sometimes? This is our space and we're going to be blunt. We need to vent and have comic relief. Go sit at the kids' table if you can't roll with it (or scroll away from it).

It's the same reason that ER doctors and nurses have a particular brand of gallows humor that would inspire onlookers to clutch their pearls if they don't understand what those professionals cope with every day.

It's also the same reason that mental health professionals have private opinions about Cluster B individuals which they generally will not disclose in public. There's a long history in psychiatry of passing such patients around or throwing in the towel because they are frequently so noxious and so impossible to treat.

We are far from alone in having our frustrations and developing our own gallows humor around them. If that person came here and failed to see that we are specifying the disordered TRA folks much of the time, that's on them. That's an important distinction and I couldn't care less that he didn't connect the dots. We know who we're talking about. And I take pains to draw that distinction on a regular basis.

But, and this is a word of caution for us generally IRL: There is always a credibility game with such abusers, and it goes like this: It is in your best interests to sound as kind and reasonable as possible when interacting with or talking with others about such people because those people WILL falsely accuse you of something the minute you have to enforce your boundaries, and you stand a lot better chance of winning in any arena where you could be judged by the ignorant, if you don't display your very justified anger and frustration openly.

Save that for private moments with people who get it. Don't show it to the abuser or any potential supporters or enablers. Not only will they not get it, they will use it against you to claim that you're the bad guy. Which is what the OP on that Reddit post is doing to us, in essence. Coming to a place where we speak a different language, and failing to interpret it properly and with the benefit of the doubt.

Good riddance. The reason I'm so disgusted with this is that it's disingenuous tattling. I am related to a person who does this, constantly feeling no empathy and distorting the truth or outright lying about others, because they're enmeshed with a narcissistic abuser who burned out, hurt, betrayed, and pissed off numerous other people in the family. No patience for it.