ColonizationThe perils of navigating the gay male dating scene as a straight female.

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[–]reluctant_commenter 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

They want to play nice because, like a significant portion of gay men, they feel the need to please everyone around them.

Dumb question, do you think this is a common issue for gay men to struggle with?

I have noticed it a lot with the few other lesbian women I've met IRL, and I know I struggle with it sometimes myself. But women in general also have this issue, so I wasn't really sure whether it was common among homosexual women per se as opposed to women, period.

[–]Neo_Shadow_LurkerPronouns: I/Don't/Care 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Dumb question, do you think this is a common issue for gay men to struggle with?

Definitely.

For fear of facing rejection, some gay men will try to appease everyone who appears to embrace them: homophobic straight women, 'queer' grifters, you name it.

This is why you'll see some even embrace far-right homophobic groups: they want to feel accepted so much that they literally throw themselves in the arms of the first ones who appear to like them.

The reason behind this? Well...

In gay men who have been rejected as kids this could be framed as an extreme reaction to abandonment, like a defense mechanism.

In middle class ones who have grown to be woke slaves to the TQ+ this is just an element to their neverending quest to obtain social status, be recognized.

It's stupid and dumb, but that's how it is most of the time.

[–]reluctant_commenter 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thanks for explaining, I appreciate it. That makes a lot of sense. Particularly the point about far-right homophobic groups-- that one always confused me.