LifestyleWhere do you meet like-minded LGB people in real life?

submitted by PeakingPeachEaterfemale♀ | detrans🦎 | eater of peaches 🍑 from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries" 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

I've found that reasonable straight people including liberal ones are open to having the veil pulled off of gender ideology. A lot of them have been seeing red flags but they lack the information and context to see the bigger picture. They're also completely unaware of the legal changes happening in the west as well as the rapid changing dialogue, including what is and isn't permissible to say. I find that a lot of liberal but not overly woke straight men are especially skeptical of pronouns in signatures and stuff like that.

Now on the subject of LGB people. I live in a highly concentrated area of wokery. The gay institutions in this area have been undergoing coups over the last few years as the original founders and previous leaders are being replaced by trans people and LGB people on board with gender ideology. For example, organizations founded and led by lesbians are now being run by trans people and obvious lesbians, but who refuse to call themselves as anything but "queer" and can't take a breath of air without uttering the word "inclusive." So it is suffocating out the ability to talk about these things and find our own. I am drowning amongst lesbians who identify as anything but lesbian or women it seems. It's depressing af. And also a huge turn off.

What I've found is that because organizations including corporations are increasingly encouraging people to put pronouns in their email signatures, but it is generally not mandatory, this can be instructive. Note who does that, but note who among the lot chooses not to. Focus on the people who do not. Be wary of those who do.

Another good way to find who has lost it and who hasn't is to innocently bring up Harry Potter, if that is something you think you can do naturally. Like, "I heard they released a special limited edition illustrated version of the Harry Potter series. I'm thinking of getting it for myself/my sister as a gift." Gauge response. Do they fly off the handle and go on their soapbox?

[–]HelloMomo 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Another good way to find who has lost it and who hasn't is to innocently bring up Harry Potter

I was on a dating app today, and I noticed sever profiles with something along the lines of "harry potter nerd" in the bio. I can't be sure, of course, but I wondered if they meant anything by it.

Is he... you know... a friend of Dorothy? Is she... you know... a Harry Potter fan?

[–]PeakingPeachEaterfemale♀ | detrans🦎 | eater of peaches 🍑[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That would be a nice "subtle" sign to indicate someone is LGBDroptheT...

Or maybe they just really like Harry Potter and ignore all the politics around it, haha.

[–]PeakingPeachEaterfemale♀ | detrans🦎 | eater of peaches 🍑[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Can't believe that there are companies requiring pronouns. It's just plain silly. Currently, my boss is a MtF...glad he didn't make us do dumb pronoun crap, but he's not the main MAIN boss. I have many stories about him, but in different sub.

That boss got mad at a coworker for saying "Yes ma'am" or "Aw man"(expression) thinking that the coworker was calling MtF boss a "man" when said coworker kept explaining he didn't call him a "man". My particular department is EXTREMELY entrenched in that "wokeness". They talk politics at work often and sincerely believe MtF boss is a woman....the coworkers I am friendly with talk about how they're basically BFFs with that boss which I find rather...odd for workplace etiquette but I digress.

That is quite depressing that LGB people are calling themselves "queer". We are trying to get away from hateful word. You're right about it being a turn off---both romantic and platonic. I don't like to be friend either with overly "queer" people. It's sad. It was kinda hard when i tried to date same-sex in the past, most were "woke" oooor just plain unavailable(or I was just scared of being rejected...again..)

That's funny you bring up Harry Potter. I used to like it a lot when I was a bit younger. Then, I kinda got over it. I thought JKR was one of those "woke" folks trying to get inclusive points by making dumbledore gay out of nowhere. Now? I think I might like JKR again hahaha.

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries" 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

As a point of clarification I don’t know that any companies require them specifically, but some strongly encourage them. What a toxic environment. Do your boss and coworkers know your sexual orientation? And are you looking for other jobs?

[–]PeakingPeachEaterfemale♀ | detrans🦎 | eater of peaches 🍑[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Ah okay, I see. And no, the only one who knows is the "pansexual" coworker. Everyone else told me they thought I was gay...until they found out I was pregnant and laughed...like...what??? Every job I get, people ask me if I have a boyfriend and when I used to say no(before I was with current partner) they'd ask me if I had a girlfriend instead like...what? Why are you asking me these personal questions?

I currently am looking for new job. I do not like how politics are in job. I need to finish degree and go back to school...I'm strongly into tech and creative stuff.

Then I also have many problems with snooty MtF boss, he say condescending things to me. For example, one of my micromanaging boss(let's call him the "professor", he's above me but below MtF boss) specifically told me to ask him to make these tech tickets for job because he didn't want me to make a bunch of random tickets for not knowing how to troubleshoot specific issues. I was new at the time, so I thought, okay sure.

The professor was not around, and so I ask MtF boss who's above both of us if I should make ticket, I exhaust all troubleshooting options I could think of at the time(I know a LOT more know than back then, I mentor people and created two training/resource guides for two different departments.)

MtF boss say "What are you, a child? Why do you need permission?"

....I...I'm asking for HELP not permission. Oh well. He say many comments like this to me and I can't do anything about it because everyone excuses his behaviour.

And he never listens to reason. For example, the professor and one other boss, lets call, the sloth(same level as professor), tell me to do different things. This gets me in trouble with MtF boss. MtF boss says "Why did you do that when you are supposed to do XYZ?" Because I didn't know and both the professor and the sloth told me too. "That's funny, because I told them not to do that"

Then I send SCREENSHOTS of those bosses telling me to do that.

"Well, they said that 3 days ago, they know now. So don't do that."

Well what the fuck? You asked me WHY and I told you why. What else do you want from me?

Oh...to top it all off? He's a polyarmous, married transbian who believes in witch craft and had an "oops" child who's may toddler to gradeschool age. Brags about how him and his wife NEVER argue(according to him, his wife has either autism or aspergers...I sense someone may be taking advantage of the other...). Brags about how great he is and his military days, and boasts that he basically "built" this company, HAH!

Also...I found out his deadname by accident at the job site. Assuming he worked there for maybe...10 years and he might be 50y.o(because he's sooo "old" as he says), then he was maybe 40y.o when he transistioned.

That does not seem like body dysphoria to me.

I struggled for many years and...I...still think about it sometimes but bury that in the back of my head if I can because it sucks.