Ellen Page is claiming to be transgender. What is going on?!

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[–]MarkTwainiac 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

It wasn't your comment I was taking issue with. Not at all. I was responding to the other poster who asked if Page really was "gender non-conforming" (whatever that's supposed to mean). She always came off to me like many other girls or women, not particularly fussed with appearance and not concerned with constantly thinking in terms of "feminine" and "masculine."

Edit: sistersovermisters, see my post below. I just did an image search of Page. I think you'd find it worthwhile do the same. Neither in the past or now has Page ever been in the habit of "presenting" in a way that is at all extraordinary for women in North America outside of a few relatively rare fundamentalist religious communities (Hasidic Jews, the Amish, some strict Mormons). In Saudi Arabia, Iran or Pakistan, yes Page might stand out as different in appearance on the streets/in public - but in the vast majority of NA, as well as in Europe and Australia and New Zealand, no.

[–]Sistersovermisters 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I totally agree with what MarkTwainiac said about her not really concerned with constantly thinking in the "feminine" and "masculine" terms. I haven't really involved myself with GC discussion since the subreddit was removed, so I appreciate seeing more properly word/descriptors of what I am trying to get across! I am also learning still about the gender discussion, so what I may say could be misinformed or built on misinterpretation. I am a lurker at heart, I do apologize!

[–]MarkTwainiac 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I do apologize!

Sisterovermisters, please don't apologize! You have nothing to apologize for.

We're discussing ideas here, and since language shapes ideas (and vice a versa), some of us also challenge the terminology that is often used. But that doesn't mean anyone is casting personal aspersions on anyone else.

Please post more. It makes the sub much livelier. When pain-in-the-ass, know-it-all posters with a longer historical perspective like me challenge you, please don't take it as a scolding or an attack. I express myself forthrightly, but I try to do so without ever demeaning the posters I'm responding to. If I ever come across as rude or dismissive, tell me so I can consider what I've said and make corrections if needed. I won't bite your head off or call you names. Promise. But perhaps I will be the one issuing apologies.

On this sub, most of the poster are all on the same side, which is the side of civility and free speech and questioning today's crazy gender ideology. But a lot of us still have have plenty of disagreements about various topics.

BTW, there is nothing wrong with be a learner. We're all learning! I'm old and I still learn new stuff every day. Learning is one of the things that IMO makes life worth living. And no one here will tell you to go "educate yourself" LOL.

Best wishes. And please do post more.

[–]Sistersovermisters 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Oh, no, I completely understand! I am trying to get over apologizing to others when I feel like I've stepped on some toes, but this actually feels great to be prodded to try to think more about what I want to say! I really do appreciate that. Failing and learning is probably one of the best things a person can do, and I'm really open to accepting humility and gaining experience from experienced posters!

Thank you for your kind words, and best wishes to you as well. I'll try to post and gain that confidence!

[–]MarkTwainiac 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The urge to say "I'm sorry" all the time comes from the ways females are socialized from infancy. You can get over it, though it will take vigilance and effort. But it's within your power to pull off. Give yourself time.

BTW, you didn't step on anyone's toes here. Not even close. You simply made a point that seemed vague and was unsubstantiated; as a result others didn't understand and wanted you to clarify what you meant. No big deal.

Also, even if you had stepped on someone's toes - so what! Stepping on someone's toes is not like running somebody over in car, or dropping a safe or ton of bricks on them from several stories up like happens in cartoons.

Making unclear, unsubstantiated points on the internet is not a crime. Billions of people do it every day. Be kind to yourself.