Old timer not woke enough to know that when a man claima he's a woman you have to roleplay with him. Man's feels get hurt :( lol

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[–]fuckingsealions 16 insightful - 2 fun16 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

"Too much info"

Uh people have eyeballs.

[–]Cass[S] 14 insightful - 2 fun14 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 2 fun -  (5 children)

In case it gets deleted:

So my girlfriend happens to be trans. We just got back from a camping trip several hours away from the city we live in and on the way back visited some of my relatives in a small town who a know to be a little backwards/ignorant in their thinking.

So it goes like this: we arrive at my aunt and uncles place where everyone is congregated outside on the deck. My aunt, her sister and my cousin give me a hug, “how nice it is to see you dear”, etc. They’d not met my girlfriend before and I didn’t mention she was coming with me (probably mistake number one to be honest). So after our greetings, aunt #2 says “and who is your friend here?” to which I reply “this is my girlfriend, <name>”.

So this is where it gets ackward: my girlfriend is just starting on hormones and besides her long hair has a ways to go before she’s what you’d call “passing”. I could feel the initial superficial warmth of my aunts disappearing, replaced by ignorance and a lack of understanding as to why I said this was my girlfriend. I could feel my face getting flushed and blurt out “she’s trans, okay?” to which my GF says “hello, too much info do you think?” There was some very ackward laughter in response to that followed by a long ackward pause and then things just felt weird the rest of the time we were there.

Once we left, back in the car, my GF was furious. She says I put her on the spot and had no right to call out her gender identity like that. In my defense, I hadn’t mentally prepared for the situation and don’t know how I could have handled it that wouldn’t have led to ackwardness: if I hadn’t explained my GF was trans I just know my gossipy aunts would have been sitting there staining at her the whole time, probably mocking us in their heads, transphobic bullshit like “why is he calling that man in a skirt his GF”.

So, main thing I’m wondering: how to go about introducing my GF to potentially transphobic people in my life? I’d like to not just cut them right out — certainly not without giving them the chance to be accepting — but at the same time I feel as if so many people require an explanation from me. Like should I tell them in advance “heads up, just so you know, my GF is trans“. Talking about her behind her back line that just feels even worse than what I did. As if I need to justify to people why I’m with her. :(

All comments berated him for outing his boyfriend. We are living in a mad world.

[–]MarkTwainiac 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I suspect this story is a fabrication. There'd be no need to say, "This is Jackie, my girlfriend." He could easily have just said, "This is Jackie" and leave it at that.

If this couple had visited the BF's relatives for real, you can bet your ass that on the way there (if not before) he & his trans "GF" would've discussed at length how the "GF" wanted to be introduced & they both would've decided on exactly what info to reveal & hold back. The way lesbians and gay people used to do back in the 1960s, 70s and 80s.

I just know my gossipy aunts would have been sitting there staining at her the whole time, probably mocking us in their heads, transphobic bullshit like “why is he calling that man in a skirt his GF”.

Since the BF has such a negative view of his aunts - and he also has powers of omniscience so stupendous he can read his aunts' minds in advance - why would he have brought his GF there in the first place? After all, in his eyes they don't just live in a small town, they are small minded and "ignunt" too:

some of my relatives in a small town who a know to be a little backwards/ignorant in their thinking.

If this visit did actually happen, I suspect it's coz in his heart of hearts the BF hates his former BF for starting on cross-sex hormones and now pretending to be his GF and expecting his BF and everyone else to play along with the charade.

[–]Cass[S] 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Idk, TRAs see themselves as deserving lots more rights than gay people had in the 70s. They already have more rights than women and they introduced wrongspeak laws to defend their delusions.

Either way, the replies are entertaining too.

[–]MarkTwainiac 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yes, trans people today see themselves as deserving more rights than gay people in the 70s, and women today (and forever). But the issue in this anecdote wasn't rights, it was strategies for dealing with family and interpersonal relationships. Etiquette, methods of introduction, what info to reveal and what not to reveal. These are issues not of legal rights but of social mores and customs. In a word, manners.

[–]Aloudmeow 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Why is she staring at that man wearing a skirt? Cause he’s a man wearing a skirt ... and he’s not a Scotsman.

[–]firebird 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

In case it gets deleted

It's archived now: https://archive.vn/lbC90

[–]MarkTwainiac 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

This reddit post begins with: My (33m) girlfriend (36f) is furious I introduced her as being trans

OP, you titled your post "Old timer not woke enough to know that when a man claims he's a woman you have to roleplay with him..." Who is the "old timer" here?

[–]Cass[S] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I could feel the initial superficial warmth of my aunts disappearing, replaced by ignorance and a lack of understanding as to why I said this was my girlfriend.

If the aunt was woke she should have known to go along with it instead of going "wtf".

But I can tell this is a troll question since it's obvious my much better title isn't about OP or OP's boyfriend.

[–]MarkTwainiac 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Sorry, the meaning of your "much better title" might be obvious to you, but it isn't to others. At all.

So in the title of your thread you meant to portray the reddit poster's aunts as the "old timers"?

How come, then, your title says:

Old timer not woke enough to know that when a man claima he's a woman you have to roleplay with him. Man's feels get hurt :( lol

Are you seriously suggesting the aunts have "man feels"?

Also, why is your immediate knee-jerk response to someone asking for clarification to immediately retort

I can tell this is a troll question

Why not just answer the question?

Could it be that what you were really trying to say in your title was something more along the lines of

Relatives of man whose BF is posing as his GF not woke enough to know they have to go along with the pretense...

Why the attempt to make what is apparently a culture clash solely about age? Why denigrate the aunts as "old timer"(s)?

[–]grixit 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Are you seriously suggesting the aunts have "man feels"?

no, the "girlfriend" does.

[–]missdaisycan 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Being "Woke" was the packet from which the koolaid was made. And I disagree with your assessment "my much better title".

[–]our_team_is_winning 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

<So my girlfriend happens to be trans. >  Your BOYFRIEND.

<how to go about introducing my GF to potentially transphobic people in my life? I’d like to not just cut them right out — certainly not without giving them the chance to be accepting>

They will either play along with the LARP or I will cut them out, even my own family! Because my sexual fetish (dating a TiM) comes before family, before reality, before anything! #FetishLifeForever  /sarc

They blame him for outing the LARPer. Like the "girlfriend" was totally passing if he hadn't said anything. This is just sick.

[–]Finnegan7921 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If this is true, which is difficult to believe, there's NO way this guy wouldn't have mentioned this to his family. You don't just drop by with "this is my g/f" when g/f looks like a dude with long hair in woman's clothes. The guy should just come out of the closet and admit he's gay.

[–]yishengqingwa666 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

None of them pass.