Discussion- Reclaiming T*RF

submitted by RuminatingOracle from self.GenderCritical

I've been thinking a lot about words and meanings since coming to GC. I believe that words have the power we imbue them with. For instance, "woman" is a powerful word with significance to us, which is why we are not willing to let trans people re-purpose it for their own purposes. What about trf? It is a slur because it is spewed with hatred and often paired with terms of violence. Can we reclaim and repurpose trf ever? why or why not?

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[–]censorshipment 27 insightful - 2 fun27 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 2 fun -  (5 children)

I prefer merf, male-exclusionary radical feminist. This means that I not only exclude males/men from womanhood but also feminism. Male feminist is an oxymoron. Males who genuinely support radical feminism can be called allies, although I personally don't want their support within radfem groups... they need their own sector.

[–]RuminatingOracle[S] 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I like merf

[–]Spikygrasspod 8 insightful - 3 fun8 insightful - 2 fun9 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

adjective: merven

[–]DogeWalker 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Brb, starting a band called Merven Maiden

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Seconded. It's more accurate anyway. Everywhere they call us Terfs we should reply that we are merfs. Lol.

If they keep saying TWAW, then TW are male "women."

[–]Chewedanddigested 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Fun fact, a MRF (pronounced merf) is a materials recovery facility.

I suppose we do wade through a lot of garbage, but I’m just not sure I could get over calling myself a waste processing plant.

[–]materialrealityplz 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

It was created to label feminists who didn't believe transwomen were women. We can't reclaim it, and we don't want it. It's not even true because we aren't 'trans-exclusionary', cause any female who is trans, is in our feminism.

The best measure is just to not react, if someone calls you a terf, calmly explain why are not, or whatever. Or don't respond at all. Getting mad or outraged about being called a terf is losing.

[–]RuminatingOracle[S] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That's a good point about it not being accurate. It doesn't bother me because usually whoever is saying it has no actual analytical skills, but I am tired of seeing it in the media and it being the only thing people know about radfem

[–]midgetmetalhead19 13 insightful - 2 fun13 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I like the idea of reclaiming it under the ‘Tired of Explaing Reality to F-kwits’ abbreviation.

[–]SanityIsGC 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

REFRAME not reclaim. ‘Tired of Explaining Reality to F-kwits’ is brilliant

[–]yishengqingwa666 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

No. Slurs cannot be reclaimed.

[–]sisterinsomnia 10 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Claim it in the first place? Those called T*RFS didn't create the term.

[–]RuminatingOracle[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Correct. As in most groups, slurs are created by those outside the group to denigrate group members.

[–]cybitch 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Maybe we should ask ourselves why we don't see any male spaces having this discussion right now. Why do women insist on having lists of words they cannot say while men don't? Could it be that people who want you to police your own language aren't interested in what you have to say, only in imposing their own ideology onto you? Maybe one day women can actually be heard somewhere on the internet. Until then, enjoy agonizing over your list of naughty words you won't allow yourself to say while men go around saying whatever they want without giving a ****.

[–]RuminatingOracle[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I think I might be missing your point. I censored myself for the respect of the sub only, as the rules say no slurs. Personally, I say you should say whatever the fuck you want.

[–]Moirawr 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

People have a lot of different opinions about reclaiming slurs. Personally I have zero interest in reclaiming sexist slurs. I don’t want to give men an even further pass to think calling women Bs and Cs is just fine and dandy. I don’t want to call women terf or be called that. I don’t want terf to be cemented into public lexicon. People still mostly don’t know what it means, it was the most googled word after the JKR stuff happened. Even when all the TRA crap crumbles “terfs” will always be known as the bad women that hate trans people. Why keep up with that branding when radfem/GC works and is more accurate and will remain accurate over time. Seems worse than a waste of time. If we look at the reclaiming of n word and queer it seems to have turned out badly. More kids saying and exposed to it than ever, and heterosexuals calling themselves queer, and it seems like it hasn’t deterred racists or homophobes at all. I just read like yesterday an 80something feminist was lectured that she should be ok with other people calling her queer. I seriously never heard the n word (besides black media) til like high school and all the white kids were having a grand old time with it but they “weren’t racist.” How, do you ask? They don’t hate black people, they hate n words. I personally know one of those guys is a schizophrenic who would fantasize about becoming a cop and shooting n words. But it’s okay he’s not racist, he doesn’t hate black people you guys! Chris Rock said so! It also really, really annoys me when the right come up with new words and it’s adopting by people in the left like immediately? Simp and cuck off the top of my head. I’m rambling now, I’m not black or gay so take all that with a grain of salt, but maybe someone will share their insight on other slurs.

Tl;dr No way

[–]RuminatingOracle[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

It might be a ramble but I get it, and all of it makes sense to me

[–]Moirawr 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thanks, I make connections in my head that I only realize later did not come across in my post at all lol.

[–]SharpTomorrow 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

TERF is a slur and doesn't even describe what gender critical feminists are.

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think "T*RF" is past the transmutation date, and a lot of women didn't want it added to the (long) list of misogynist epithets to begin with. Reclaiming can be a useful tool, though -- sometimes it works. "Witch" is a good example.

That said, I'm a crazy b-tch and I'll field "T*RF" and hurl it right back between the eyes of any TRA who's fool enough to mess with me. That's weaponized irony, though, not reclaiming. (See what I did there?) 😈

(edit for clarity)

[–]RuminatingOracle[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Lol, I like you

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Karen has morphed into a replacement for “b—tch” as TERF. People are misogynistic. I don’t think it can be reclaimed.