Tra/qt how is ‘examine your genital preference’ not homosexual conversion therapy?

submitted by HouseplantWomen who disagree with QT are a different sex from self.GCdebatesQT

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[–]circlingmyownvoid2 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (23 children)

Asking someone to analyze something isn’t equivalent to demanding a change.

If someone tells you they don’t like trains and you ask why it isn’t a demand to change, but a search for analysis.

If your answer is “It takes to long with all the stops so isn’t convenient for my lifestyle” that’s not something anyone is saying change. If the answer is “because poor people ride them and they are diseased” that’s a problematic belief worth addressing and even after changing that problematic belief you may still not like trains for non problematic reasons.

The genital preference thing is similar. If you say you are in to women but not trans women and someone asks why, that’s not demanding change. If the answer is “because I’m not attracted to penises or neovaginas” that’s not problematic. If the answer is “because trans women are men” that is a problematic belief that they may ask you to address, but also leaves open the possibility that you wouldn’t be attracted to trans women even if you addressed that bigoted belief (that trans women are men). They aren’t saying you should sleep with trans women, they are saying that if you exclude trans women you should examine why to see if there is a bigoted belief behind it. No one is saying change, they are saying analyze yourself to see if you have bigoted beliefs which that preference might be indicative of.

The goal isn’t to change the preference. That’s the difference.

[–]HouseplantWomen who disagree with QT are a different sex[S] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (22 children)

Don’t you think there’s a bit of a difference between disliking trains and being asked to analyse ones own sexuality for the comfort of another?

Why does a persons sexuality require their analysis over who it excludes?

Is homosexuality really just a preference? That implies that it can be changed or that it is a choice one makes.

[–]circlingmyownvoid2 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (21 children)

Because it may be indicative of bigotry. Not is. May be. So if you care that you may have bigoted beliefs (ie that trans women are men) that it may be worth analyzing those beliefs. Maybe they are maybe you just don’t like them. If you want to know you can examine that.

Here’s an analogous example. I’m attracted to men but would never be in a relationship with one or spend the night with one. (As opposed to just a hookup and leaving). This isn’t because I’m not attracted to them but because I don’t trust men enough to sleep next to one. Hence the fact I wouldn’t date a man is based on my beliefs about men rather than attraction. I’m also not acting to change that. That same analysis can be applied to other attractions and doesn’t need to come with a demand for change.

[–]Omina_SentenziosaSarcastic Ovalord 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (20 children)

The difference is that people like me do not give a damn if you decide to date men or not or why, because we understand that it' s none of our business if you do it or not: it' s your life, it' s your body, it' s your time. Your decision to not date men clearly comes from bigotry and misandry since you don' t trust them because they are men and you hate them because they are men. Wanna guess what I think on the matter? That it' s none of my business.

Your decision to date is your own and anyone who thinks it' s their responsibility to tell you to think it over is a noisy asshole to be generous.

[–]circlingmyownvoid2 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (19 children)

Your decision to not date men clearly comes from bigotry and misandry since you don' t trust them because they are men and you hate them because they are men.

That’s my point. It can be seen as a bigoted belief and I’m not changing it. That can be the answer from you too. If you examine and go “nope trans people are just gross” then that’s your answer but it’s still at least been analyzed.

Who you date isn’t my business. And let you don’t have to analyze anything. But if you want to know whether you are acting from bigoted underlying belief or not, that knowledge is going to come from reflection.

It’s not “change your behavior” it’s “hey that behavior may have some underlying problematic beliefs, you may want to examine that”. Those two statements aren’t the same thing.

[–]Omina_SentenziosaSarcastic Ovalord 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (18 children)

But nobody should tell you to do it, because it' s none of their business.

It' s invasive as fuck to have strangers telling you "you should rethink about the people you don' t want to fuck", especially if the people who tell you that are part of the category you are turning down.

These people are not telling anyone that they should rethink their decision to not date trans people out of goodness or desire to destroy bigotry, they are doing it because lesbians' s refusal means that they are told no more often than yes, and this leads to them not getting laid.

[–]circlingmyownvoid2 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (17 children)

These people are not telling anyone that they should rethink their decision to not date trans people out of goodness or desire to destroy bigotry, they are doing it because lesbians' s refusal means that they are told no more often than yes, and this leads to them not getting laid.

I don’t think that’s true at all. Hell a lot of those conversations are coming from trans women who won’t even date natal women.

[–]Omina_SentenziosaSarcastic Ovalord 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (16 children)

They are just doing it to normalize dating them and shaming people who don' t date them. Lesbians are just easier to harrass than straight men.

But once you establish that "convincing" people to rethink their sexual orientation is ok, then you can shame anyone into doing it. Of course some people are, thankfully, more stubborn than others.

[–]circlingmyownvoid2 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (15 children)

They are just doing it to normalize dating them and shaming people who don' t date them.

I don’t think that’s true. They are doing it to try to fight the beliefs that trans women are men and trans men are women. It’s not about getting dates.

[–]HouseplantWomen who disagree with QT are a different sex[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

What is more bigoted?

Men are adult human males, what they do or how they present is not relevant to that.Women are adult human females. What they do or how they present is not relevant to that. 

   Or

Men are disgusting violent monsters incapable of self control or humanity and women are all amazing beautiful empathy who are good.

[–]Omina_SentenziosaSarcastic Ovalord 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

The second you try to guilty trip people into fucking someone they don' t want to fuck, it' s definitely about dates and getting laid.

You can add whatever woke fluff you want to it, but the endgame is always getting orgasms.