Words exist for people to communicate and understand each other. Most of words are based on reality and some objective things - so everyone can clearly know what is talked about. Same is with homosexuality - it is based on objective reality, on our biology. Homosexuals are not attracted to social concepts or gender stereotypes, homosexual attraction is aimed towards same sex as yourself, even the name is translated like that "same sex", lesbians are still loving "masculine" women like butch lesbians (or even transmen pre-op), this does not make them straight just because woman they love is clothing and acting like what is supposed to be from a man (here in villages it is expected from women to be very masculine and strong, for example, so in villages "feminine woman" is perceived as one with strong hands and who acts "masculine" in eyes of someone from USA, for example). What femininity and masculinity means is changing between cultures and times. There were times, when in Europe high heels, make-up, tight troucers or dresses were male-only (especially among rich people). If that "masculine" man comes to our age in USA he will be called transvestite or transgender, while he will look at transwomen and think that they are rich and very masculine. ANd regardles of the fact that masculinity and femininity always changing, homosexual people are still attracted to biological sex, not to "how society perceive that biological sex".

And, as I said, homosexuality is biological, so even if you really want and really try - you can't be attracted to males, it is just physically impossible, it will not click, it does not depend on your social perception or someones gender stereotypes, it is your organism reaction, and you can not change it. A lot of homophobes of the past tried to do different conversion therapies, a lot of homophobes were saying like you - saying that it is attraction to feminine or masculine traits and it is something in your head, that it is not biological, so it can be cured with good psychiatrist, homophobes of the past tried to gave new meaning to word "homosexuality" too, homophobes were saying "this man looks very-very feminine, and acts like a woman, he even takes care of children, like women do, he is very feminine, lesbians love femininity, try sleeping with him!". I personally suffered all of the above, and not once, and yet here you are saying and doing the same what those conservative homophobes of the past were doing. Please, do not continue like this, be a better person, if your feminism is about all minorities and everyone, then do not exclude lesbians from it by being homophobic like that. Sorry for going a bit personal here.

I do not understand why liberal feminism want to attack and impair rights of one minority to help other minority. Isn't both minorities need a protection? It isn't really a help to native americans if you do it with racism against black people, it is not really help to transgender people if it does with homophobia against lesbians/gays and sexism against females. You does not take away protections and rights from one group to give it to another, protections are not "limited resource", instead you should add new protections, new rights to new group that need protection. When women bathrooms and toilets were built, they were not built instead and in place of toilets for disabled (most countries had only men toilets and disabled toilets just few decades ago), feminism added new set of bathrooms and toilets - for females.

Duncan said wise words:

“Gender” roles and stereotypes are imprinted on my sexuality as a proxy for sex. I’m attracted to masculine things because society has associated these as markers for male sex. This is how uniform, bear and leather kinks develop. All these “gender” things are signals to my sexuality that “this is a male”, simply because we no longer walk around naked.

As Stonewall has now declared that gay men are attracted to male gender, they now have this backwards, and this is wholly homophobic. I am homosexual, exclusively attracted to the same sex. The gender roles and presentation are simply markers my sexuality uses. No wonder people are “disgusted” by gender non conformists, as their sexuality gets mixed signals and that cognitive dissonance can be felt. That is where bigotry and prejudice lie, failing to recognise it’s your sexuality having a meltdown because it’s not actually that clever, instead of recognising it and giving it a wry smile and a pat on the head.

Gay is not an identity. This isn’t exclusionary, it’s simple categorisation of facts.

I explained how my basic sexual orientation simply seeks “males” and why gender is additional to this, not the underlying reason why I have a sexuality.