Are you married? Do you have children?

submitted by fschmidt from self.AskSaidIt

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[–]Node 9 insightful - 3 fun9 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 3 fun -  (17 children)

Without getting into the political side of your question, I have reproduced, but the amount of grooming required to maintain a female is off-putting.

[–]Vulptex 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (15 children)

We need to stop raising boys and girls so differently. Men grow up thinking they're worthless and that they don't matter, and that it's wrong for them to enjoy life or express themselves, while women become entitled and manipulative. It's not even that they're bad people, they've just been told it's normal and good for them to do that. And everyone expects men to do all the bad stuff and save the women from all the trouble, and shower her with gifts and attention and money while she just sits there and takes it.

[–]Node 4 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 3 fun -  (7 children)

I don't think that's an accurate description of what men grow up to think, given my childhood. It was more that almost everyone else was worth less. To be blunt, men in the lowest 20% are worth less than those above them, in a gross sense, so there would be some accurate self-perception at work there. Depending on the criteria, people have a range of values.

As for men doing, it's how we work. Doesn't necessarily mean becoming a ditch digger, but physically doing is pleasurable in itself, whether a female is present or not. However, being a member of a well-functioning male/female team can enhance the pleasure from doing, as it's furthering the success of the team.

And everyone expects men to

Who cares what they expect or think.

[–]Vulptex 6 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 3 fun -  (6 children)

I was pointing it out because you said a woman is too much to handle. It wouldn't be if she didn't expect you to do everything for her.

[–]Node 4 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 4 fun -  (5 children)

Not too much to handle. More that the amount and degree of maintenance required can be more than it's worth. Certainly not always the case, but it's not exactly rare either.

Don't know what kind of pets you've had, but say you got one of those dogs that needs hours of physical interaction everyday, or it goes nuts. You may or may not think it's worth the energy, depending on where you are in your life, your interests, and all that. What if it began biting you?

So it's less her expecting you to do everything, and more about some of them needing more care and handling than it's worth.

On a separate note, if you're ever in the market for a low maintenance pet that's cool and amazing, look into tarantulas.

[–]Tiwaking 3 insightful - 5 fun3 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 5 fun -  (1 child)

Node 4 insightful - 2 fun - 13 hours ago Not too much to handle. More that the amount and degree of maintenance required can be more than it's worth.

Whenever a girl says that she "Feels fat today", tell her that she looks fat too. Then run away because she is too fat to chase you.

[–]Node 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Unfortunately, she was physically upper end of the scale. Made the neuroticism harder to focus on.

*upper end of the 1-10 scale, not the scale on the bathroom floor.

[–]Vulptex 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

The reason so many of them need so much is because most women are so spoiled in this society. Men are taught not to expect things and to sacrifice their own good for others', especially women. Women are taught that they are entitled to being happy and comfortable 24/7, and that everyone else (especially men) is obligated to coddle them to that state.

I think if anything women are naturally more selfless because they get an internal reward for doing good that men don't. But then we teach children from a young age that boys are troublemakers who should shut up and girls are innocent and special and the world revolves around them.

[–]Node 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Men are taught not to expect things and to sacrifice their own good for others', especially women.

Men are exposed to and taught a variety of skills, about cultural practices, and theories about how the world works. I think your idea that men (women, and children) are universally taught just one way to be is too rigid.

[–]Vulptex 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It's pretty standard across many different cultures, and a lot of people think it's a human instinct recognizing male expendability.

[–]grassfed 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

We should homeschool all children and feed them natural foods

[–]Cornfed 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (5 children)

The still need to be raised differently, just not horribly.

[–]Vulptex 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Why do they need to be raised differently if not because one is more valued than the other?

[–]Cornfed 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

Because they have general biological differences and therefore in a sane society have generally different functions.

[–]Vulptex 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Then it should come naturally, no need to force it.

[–]Cornfed 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

As with anything, there is need to teach them how to properly fill their roles.

[–]Vulptex 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Then you're forcing it.

[–][deleted] 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

amount of grooming required to maintain a female

Probably won't surprise anyone, I'm usually the high maintenance one in relationships.

I was thinking of asking my girlfriend if instead of just her and the wife we maybe add 5 more women friends just so I have enough people to talk to.

I respect though that they aren't trusting of other women's intentions.