you are viewing a single comment's thread.

view the rest of the comments →

[–]Alienhunter糞大名 4 insightful - 4 fun4 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 4 fun -  (11 children)

Might be that. You make the hamburger from shit, you tell people that Nazis hate the shit hamburger, people buy it to show they aren't shit hating Nazis. Hamburger is still made from shit.

Guess it's like the Christian movies that are like "Atheists don't want you to see this powerful movie" and it's like low budget lifetime movie shit. Man meets girl, man has sex with girl before marriage, girl gets abortion, both go to hell. The end.

[–]LordoftheFliesAmeri-kin 2.0. Pronouns: MegaWhite/SuperStraight/UltraPatriarchy 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

low budget lifetime movie shit

Which is an awfully low bar to begin with, Lifetime movies are not notable for their lavish budgets. Or their plots beyond "woman is abused."

[–]Alienhunter糞大名 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

There's a whole genre of low budget christian ideological wankbait films. Like some lifetime , occasionally they can be quite entertaining, especially when you get to the apocalypse thriller style or comedy films, there's something endearing about trying to do a squeaky clean low violence no cursing Christian movie about the literal battle of Armageddon that just trends toward beautiful camp. I remember seeing one where some guy was the President and he was brothers with the EU president who turned out to be Satan and he morphed into Bahomet or whatever they call it and had a fist fight. Satan won then Jesus showed up in a literal Deus Ex Machina to save the day. Extremely entertaining.

Unfortunately most of them are really poor quality dating movies made for single or Christian women that like to wag their fingers and moralize everything. I don't really care if a movie has a message I agree with or not so long as it's good, but it's apparent these movies believe the message is more important than the movie and tend to have sermon scenes where the plot just stops for 20 minutes so you can watch a sermon. Sometimes literally the framing device for the sermon is everyone sitting in church listening to the sermon. Hilarious but unfortunately boring as sin.

[–]jet199 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Boyfriend is evil, ex-husband is good.

Babysitter/sister/daughter you gave up for adoption wants to steal your life.

Hometown ex-boyfriend is your true love.

[–]jet199 1 insightful - 4 fun1 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 4 fun -  (3 children)

The last Christian movie I accidentally watched, the Christian guy's evil boss tried to ruin him so he set up his own business and got really rich. Then his boss lost all his customers because they found out he was evil and the ending was, I kid you not, the Christian guy gave the evil boss all the money he had made through his own hard work for no good reason.

It was worse than abortion.

[–]Alienhunter糞大名 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Lol. Those types are always the worst. Why can't they make good shit like Ben Hur or 10 Commandments anymore?

There was that Russel Crowe Noah movie recently that had weird rock giants and shit and I'm thinking like, there's a pretty good global warming angle you could shoehorn into this movie, but you go with the giants? Ok

I did see this one movie with that chick from back to the future 3 that got banned in Malaysia for disrespecting the prophet Noah. Noah fled Sodom with his brother Lot but then Lot became a pirate and tried to take over the ark and eat all the animals. Then God decided humans were fucked and he was gonna kill everyone, but then Noah got drunk god thought it was funny and decided to give humanity a third chance or some shit. Was biblically illiterate as fuck made me scratch my head who made it.

[–]jet199 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

No, Noah being a drunk is in the bible. And it gets a lot worse than that with his drinking.

[–]Alienhunter糞大名 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

All Noah did was get drunk and fall asleep naked. If your not done that you've not lived.

[–]UrethraFranklin 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

The best summation of God's Not Dead I saw was "it teaches you that the best thing you can do to an atheist is run them over with your car".

[–]Alienhunter糞大名 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

God's not dead 4: We the People

"A group of parents led by a local pastor are home-schooling their children when a representative from social services makes an unannounced visit and determines the parents' teaching is not sufficient, in light of the requirements of the common core state standards. A local judge, played by Jeanine Pirro, gives them a week to prove that their education is adequate or the students will be forced to go to public school. The pastor and the parents head to Washington, D.C. to testify in front of a Congressional sub-committee on home-schooling. Much of the last half of the film consists mainly of long speeches by the parents, pastor, and members of Congress over the topic of home-schooling."

And yes this is actually the movie.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/God%27s_Not_Dead:_We_the_People

[–]Newzok 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Court drama is a the worst genre in the first place. But I did like christcore movies like image of the beast. Terrible terrible film but a real slice of preachy local church cooperation.

[–]OuroborosTheory 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

finally we have a director who can film Atlas Shrugged as it was MEANT to be depicted