I'm starting a Saidit fan-fic called Saidit Seniors. Here's a preview.

submitted by LarrySwinger2 from self.SaidIt

I've been playing with this idea for a little while. I'm going to retell some of the episodes that occur in the chat in prose form, and I will take some artistic license in the process. Here's episode TBD, which is a preview of what to expect. It's set in a school, although that isn't set in stone yet. Feedback is welcome.

Episode 1 0 TBD

In which the gang misses Phoeey

It was lunch break and the Saidit folks were hanging around in the courtyard. Larry was really quite excited about this Linux distro he installed called Slackware. "It compiles programs from source!" he said. "They are compiled specifically for my machine!" But there was a mismatch. Gravi was the only one who could vaguely follow, but he didn't quite understand what the advantage was.
"Well, let's say I want a different configuration. I don't need to find a binary with my exact preferences, I can just pass some flags so that... ah, nevermind. I forget that you aren't my techie friends."
"You always talk about stuff we can't follow. Why u do dis?" asked Gravi.
"Nothing. It's just that I miss Phooey. He'd be all over my Slackware. We have Zommy as a Phooey clone, but he isn't exactly the same. He's Phooey sans the interest in tech." (Zommy promptly waved as his name was mentioned.)
"Yeah, I miss him too," said Musky. "I think we all do. I wonder how he's doing. Sometimes I think he might have roped."
"I rope not!" said Larry. "LOL! Get it?? Rope."
Socks, who was hiding behind a tree, randomly chimed in. "I'm sure he's doing fine. People don't kill themselves over nothing, you know."
"If he's dead, I will cri," said Gravi.
"What do you think of my joke, Gravi?" asked Larry. "Am very entertained," he replied
Musky got annoyed that they were turning it into a joke. Larry apologized and noted that it was Phooey who left the clique while they kept on welcoming him, and that he'd probably pop up again before turning to suicide.
"Don't make me laugh," said socks.
"Fuck you, socks, I was agreeing with you."
"You were? My bad."
"Nobody likes you, socks. You are only here to cause discord, probably for some kind of intelligence agency like the CIA. I'm wondering if you're even human. It'd be much cheaper for them to have AI infiltrate us. Like a hologram that only appears human. In fact, I'm calling you out for that. My arm would probably go right through you." He reached out, but all it did was push the guy away a little. He thought about it for a little while and then continued: "it looks like they have tactile holograms now. I still insist that you're an adversary of some kind."
"I like socks," said Musky.
"Well, you're the only one."
"Fuck you," replied socks. "I'm just a dude who has his own opinions and doesn't care what others think, and the only reason I'm leaving right now is because of the bell (which had just rang). It would do you good to reflect on yourself and ask if your paranoia isn't getting out of hand. Toodles!"
Larry was getting worked up but Zommy tried to calm him down. "Just think about nice things. Such as the Bri'ish breakfast that I have every morning. And tea! Mmmmmmmmmmmm."
"Am going to class," said Gravi, and the others agreed that it was time to go.
"What class is next?" asked Musky. Zommy took a schedule out of his bag. "Three Perspectives on the Deep State," he replied. "There's a guest lecture in remembrance of the JFK assassination."
"Yeah, we should definitely be in time. I'm struggling with that course."
And so they were off to class.

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[–]Tom_Bombadil 5 insightful - 4 fun5 insightful - 3 fun6 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

I'm starting a Saidit fan-fic called Saidit Seniors. Here's a preview.

I figured you were making a story about an elderly group talking in a nursing home cafeteria.

Larry is telling the group about his plans to use his Linux distro to bypass the security system, so they could flee permanent incarceration; as imposed by their younger relatives.

Gravi was a compassionate resident attendant, who listened to Larry's ideas, but didn't understand them.

Each character are played by the following actors:

Larry

Gravi

Musky

Zommy

Phooey

Socks the retarded slave bot

It's a tale of tragedy.

Ultimately, it's revealed to the audience that entire story was the last furtive musings of the dying Jimmy Savile as his consciousness faded from this world, and entered oblivion.

Eternally damned, and beyond redemption.

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

waves 👋

[–]musky-the-nigger 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Long live the SS! Excellent channeling of socks the nigger AI.

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

This is good.

[–]youfuckingtwat 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (15 children)

Hilarious, Larry – though IDK - the truth is also funny:

Saturday 2 December

[3 pm – morning in the UK (according to Musky); missing a few lines; ellipses below delete the next time stamp, to save space; Zommy enters the chat]

15:01 Zommy Cheese and a bottle of merlot is all a person needs on a cold afternoon

15:07 /u/Zapped Ok. I have a question for you Europeans about mulled wine. Do you just warm it on the stove and drink it or is there more to it than that?

15:08 Gravi Do I look like I can afford wine

15:08 Zapped * whine *

15:09 Gravi What is mulled wine anyway

15:10 Zapped Something I picked up at a Lidl grocery store here in the States.

15:10 Gravi oh hot wine?

15:10 Zapped An Englishman told me that I should try it because us Americans are so uncultured. Jokingly.

15:11 Gravi We kinda heat the thing up ...Glühwein

15:12 Zapped I got unlazy and looked it up online and I guess I bought the wine already spiced up and I just have to heat it. …Blueberry.

15:14 Zommy But add some extras during the warming …Like a stick of cinnamon and a slice of orange …Or some cloves …Hot mulled wine is nice when outside in the cold …If that isn't to your taste, try warm cider

15:17 Zommy I don't think Americans are uncultured, just selectively cultured lol

15:33 Musky Good morning party people

15:33 youfuckingtwat https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jcN2w_uOy4I

15:33 Musky Got a new kettle …the Fellow Stagg EKG Electric Gooseneck Kettle

15:36 Musky I haven't timed my kettle, I don't know if it beats the microwave

15:36 Gravi Americans seriously microwave their water?

15:37 /u/detty the fuck

15:37 Gravi It's like drinking chernobyl water

15:37 Musky Microwaves and radiation waves are different

15:37 Gravi They're rather close though …And eating from a microwave is not recommended

15:38 Musky That's an old myth

15:39 detty I don't care how safe microwaves are, actually, but microwaving water is just plain weird to me

15:39 Musky Soviets probably loved that one cause their people can't build microwave ovens.

15:39 detty stupid muricans

15:39 youfuckingtwat lol musky

15:41 Musky We could easily have another bronze age collapse. Most people can't build most things we take for granted. In the past this had lead to great technological slips backwards.

15:48 LarrySwinger2 They have Lidl in the states? Cool.

15:48 Gravi My tailbone is a bit puffy, kinda painful to sit

15:49 LarrySwinger2 Zapped Gluh wine tastes terrible. That being said, the Englishman is right, you are indeed uncultured.

15:50 LarrySwinger2 Although your low tax rates are cool, as well as the fact that your state was modeled after the Roman Republic.

15:55 LarrySwinger2 …Should I apply for a job?

15:55 Musky Yes

15:55 Gravi How the fuck do you live

15:56 Musky Larry's family had a stash of Nazi gold

15:58 Zommy All the mugwort dead in my local woods

15:58 Musky If Phoeey was around he'd appreciate my $200 kettle. He has one too I believe

15:59 Zommy Does it have Bluetooth

15:59 Gravi Our gov lets us slack off for a short while …I think we're given like 250 eur?

16:00 Zommy Luxury makes me feel superior to street vermin

16:01 Musky https://www.amazon.com/Fellow-Electric-Pour-over-Temperature-Stopwatch/dp/B0BF7DXLBF/

16:01 Gravi That is one ugly kettle

16:01 Musky Zommy it does connect to wifi

16:01 Gravi U got scammed

16:01 Zommy One time I bought a £15 sandwich and threw half away

16:02 Gravi 100 for the apartment …about 20 for phone connection …5-10 for gas for the stove …20-30 for power …but then there'd be no money for eating lol

16:02 Musky Although a $30 Chinese knockoff might work even better

16:02 Zommy I only buy kettles for no more than £25 because it just needs to heat water

16:04 Musky Some of the teas I drink have a lot better extractions at slightly lower than boiling water that's hard to accurately replicate without a kettle with a temp setting

16:04 Zommy You can forage

16:05 Zommy I got a kilo of beef for £6 yesterday

16:06 LarrySwinger2 100 euros for rent lmao.

16:06 youfuckingtwat it figures that so few active users on saidit have a job

16:06 Zommy High five, fellow worker, socks ✋

16:06 Gravi eww

16:06 youfuckingtwat lol zom

16:06 youfuckingtwat high five

16:07 Zommy Work means money, which means buying cool stuff like meat

16:07 youfuckingtwat I genuinely wonder what a 100/month apartment looks like

16:07 Musky $100 euro rent is crazy

16:07 Zommy In Romania it would be a mansion

16:08 Gravi it's only 100 a month due to the renovation credit

16:08 Gravi Otherwise it'd be like 50 a month in winter

16:08 Gravi and like 20-30 in summer

[–]detty 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

why are you logging the chat you fucking glownigger

[–]youfuckingtwat 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (9 children)

logging

I don't. It's automatic. Why so hostile? Quit school recently? Bored?

[–]detty 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (8 children)

This brings more questions. Why do you have some software logging the chat for you?

[–]youfuckingtwat 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

not mine

[–]detty 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Still... why?

[–]youfuckingtwat 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

I merely found them and put them here

ask Larry, not me

[–]LarrySwinger2[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

It's because that was part of his contract with the CIA, otherwise they'll stop plowing his ass.

[–]youfuckingtwat 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Careful, NEET, you're a much easier target for insults.

[–]detty 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

"Careful, NEET, you're a much easier target for insults"☝️🤓

[–]LarrySwinger2[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

You're the one who asked for my input.

[–]youfuckingtwat 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

16:08 LarrySwinger2 no I was laughing about how ridiculously low Gravi's rent is Musky

16:08 youfuckingtwat Romanians I've talked to complain that their expenses are too high compared to their pay, hence they've moved to the UK

16:10 Gravi I still got some absinth left …I guess I might finish it

16:10 Musky Don't drink that shit it's a neurotoxin

16:11 youfuckingtwat we can already see evidence of that …but good advice

16:22 Zommy Romanians can buy an 8 bedroom mansion and land for.€20k, they come to the UK as an entire family to earn minimum wage so they return to Romania wealthy

16:23 Musky Those goddamned spics were blasting ghetto banger Latino music right outside my apartment and the dirty cockroaches moved thank god but you could still hear their dirty music offending every decent white person

16:25 Zommy I know more poles who have settled and bought a house in the UK though …polish have mostly the same values as the British which is why they integrated so well

16:27 Musky Why do the British pronounce a "bottle of water" as a "bo'oh'o'wa'er"?

16:27 youfuckingtwat Pols are also heroes for helping out Ukraine

16:28 LarrySwinger2 Man. Not enough techies here. Gravi I am still drooling over Slackware. Many packages have to be compiled from source so the terminal will spew lots of lines to indicate progress.

16:28 youfuckingtwat Brit accents are so diverse, imo

16:28 LarrySwinger2 Yeah. Musky and Zommy don't use GNU/Linux. Zommy is Phooey sans the tech part.

16:29 LarrySwinger2 is rent low in England?

16:29 youfuckingtwat no

16:29 Zommy Not really

16:30 youfuckingtwat £6000 to live in a cardboard box

16:31 Musky Phooey was like 5'2" I think …Asian grandma sized

16:33 youfuckingtwat he still is, I suppose

16:34 Musky Hopefully …He was having a hard time. …It is possible Phooey never came back cause he roped

16:35 youfuckingtwat fuck no

16:35 youfuckingtwat I don't think he was suicidal

16:35 LarrySwinger2 I mean, we kept on welcoming him, so he had that to fall back on before turning to that

16:35 youfuckingtwat facepalm

16:35 LarrySwinger2 fuck off

16:36 youfuckingtwat turning to what , larry?

16:36 LarrySwinger2 Before turning to suicide

16:36 youfuckingtwat except: NO EVIDENCE

16:37 youfuckingtwat there are 3 suicidal Saiditors, maybe 4, but phooey is the least likely

16:37 Musky He didn't talk about it but he said he was struggling. Maybe we should have taken that more seriously

16:37 youfuckingtwat sure - we should take such comments seriously

16:38 Zommy Part of me hopes he is a lurker or a discreet alt

16:38 youfuckingtwat but it's an insult to him to think he was anything close to suicidal

16:38 Musky Nah Phooey would chime in

16:38 Zommy 🙏

16:38 youfuckingtwat he kept saying he had an alternative project he was working on

16:39 youfuckingtwat another social media project

16:39 youfuckingtwat I think I knew him rather well, and would say if I thought he was suicidal, but I genuinely think he is not

16:40 youfuckingtwat but what do I know

16:40 youfuckingtwat living in my cardboard box in old blighty

16:40 youfuckingtwat I miss his arguments -

16:40 youfuckingtwat he's a master debater

16:41 Zommy I didn't ever suspect him of being that way inclined. We agreed on so many topics he was like my twin

16:41 youfuckingtwat a long lost species

16:41 Zommy Our only disagreement was on Floyd, but we came to a fair understanding of eachothers position

16:42 youfuckingtwat good thing you patched that up - I mean nobody, nobody gets between a person and his Floyd

16:42 LarrySwinger2 I was agreeing with you socks that there's no direct reason to assume he roped

16:42 youfuckingtwat oh I see

16:42 LarrySwinger2 I'd expect him to pop up here first before it ever got that far

16:42 youfuckingtwat seems so

16:43 youfuckingtwat his commitment to Saidit was better than for most users

16:43 LarrySwinger2 He was struggling for sure and probably still is. But he said "fuck you guys" and left after his post got removed by vulptex

16:43 Zommy I'll be honest. When I left here, I did drop in periodically to see what what going on. Maybe he drops in.

16:43 youfuckingtwat he was very sad when m7 asked him if he was trying to dumb down saidit with the Daily Mail posts

16:44 Zommy Many disapprove of good humour

16:44 LarrySwinger2 I g2g

16:44 LarrySwinger2 cya guys

16:44 Zommy 👋

16:44 youfuckingtwat every week for the past 2 years I've planned to leave Saidit, so there's that

16:44 Zommy Cya larry

16:44 LarrySwinger2 not to be confused with "CIA guys", whom I abhor

16:44 youfuckingtwat cya

16:44 Zommy You love us too much socks

16:44 youfuckingtwat no comment

16:44 Zommy We. Are. Faaaamily

16:45 LarrySwinger2 The only spooks I like are those who work for the FSB, ever since meeting detty ❤️

16:45 youfuckingtwat I'm nuts

16:45 detty kek

16:45 youfuckingtwat awe

16:50 detty I want a gingerbread man

17:08 Musky Bake them Detty! Use your own ginger syrup with molasses 🤤🤤🤤

17:13 youfuckingtwat ^

17:14 youfuckingtwat mole asses

17:14 youfuckingtwat mmmm

17:21 Musky No sexual harassment till she's 18, you old pervert

17:22 youfuckingtwat ?

17:22 youfuckingtwat mole asses?

17:24 Musky Down boy

17:24 Musky Lets try to preserve some semblance of childhood innocence

[–]Musky 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Oh it does beat the microwave, 2 minutes 8 seconds.

[–]Musky 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Btw, when you tag more than 3 people it doesn't notify anyone.

[–]youfuckingtwat 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

oops - corrected

[–]CheeseWizard 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

What is this "chat" thing everyone keeps talking about

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Nobody knows, it's a deep and dark mystery that I ly a select few speak of in riddles.

Oh wait, it's that button over there at the bottom of the page.

[–]LarrySwinger2[S] 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

In preferences the bottom option toggles a chat box which you will see on the frontpage. Welcome to join.

[–]SheKnowsWhatAllKnow 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Maybe @phoeey has been sacrificed by the War of Mārs with the Magic of Sāturnus at Her Divinity's Will.

All love & attribution to Her Divinity, and all shall obey Her Command, forever. 

Γῆ

[–]jbeapok 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

why pay cloud mitm fair. to do anything.how can it make any thing more protected by a i tell you is.

this what about a site with only

[–]WoodyWoodPecker 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Time for a Fiction section?

[–]LarrySwinger2[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'll ask /u/JasonCarswell to make a subsaidit for that, and then another five in the upcoming weeks for every variation one can think of.