The Average American Man Is Too Fat for Universal’s New Mario Kart Ride

submitted by neolib from thedrive.com

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[–]noshore4me 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Saved you a click: "The Mario Kart ride restricts anyone with a 40 inch waist or larger from riding. According to the CDC, the average American man's waist is 40.5 inches, which means most American men would be excluded from the ride. The average American woman's waist is 38.7 inches."

[–]1Icemonkey 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

That’s funny, because it’s mostly stupid Fatmericans who go to theme parks.

[–]SMCAB 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I've been saying it for years, start eating right and lifting you fags, see, now you can't ride the Mario ride.

Forget me taking all your shit, forget not being able to defend yourself, forget dying without your feet, forget not seeing your cock after 25. Just worry about the Mario ride, you're helping out so well.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

That’s good motivation for us.

[–]ShekelPa 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You can feel the reeees from here

[–]handbananasrevenge 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I was told that body shaming men is fine.

[–]package 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

>average adult too big to fit on ride made for children

[–]monkeymagic 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

so no matter who goes on this ride, there’s gonna be almost no give in the case of an accident lol. 15 mph crash = broken ribs.