Saudi Man Faces 1,000 Lashes for Having Sex With Vacuum Cleaner

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[–]MyLongestJourney 7 insightful - 4 fun7 insightful - 3 fun8 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

"And the vacuum cleaner was sentenced to death by stoning for adultery".

[–]CreditKnifeMan 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (3 children)

How long does it take to deliver 1000 lashings?

The guy who administered the lashings will probably quit half way through.

He'll get so tired that his arm will feel like it is going to fall off.

[–]jet199 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I'm thinking they will have a few guys taking turns.

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (1 child)

They could hire flippy the fast food robot, also known as whippy the flogging robot.

[–]CreditKnifeMan 3 insightful - 3 fun3 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

They could hire flippy the fast food robot, also known as whippy the flogging robot.

While Flippy was wrapping the Great Kitchens of World Tour, fate intervened upon a chance encounter with a beautiful young vacuum cleaner...

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 8 fun2 insightful - 7 fun3 insightful - 8 fun -  (6 children)

That's gotta suck!

[–][deleted]  (5 children)

[removed]

    [–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

    What is a chop chop square? It sounds fun.

    [–]Vulptex[A] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

    Removed for advocating/threatening violence.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

    [removed]

      [–]Vulptex[A] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      If you continue to advocate violence and spam in big letters, you will be banned.

      [–][deleted]  (2 children)

      [deleted]

        [–]jet199 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

        The man was caught in full action by his wife of 17 years before she reported her husband to authorities.

        “After 17 years of loyalty, this is how this miscreant treats me,” she told local reporters. “I feel used, I feel dirty,” she added.

        That's one way to get out of a marriage in an Islamic State. Claim adultery with a hoover.

        [–]Alienhunter 2 insightful - 5 fun2 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 5 fun -  (0 children)

        Vacuum cleaners tend to make a lot of noise. Of course since we all know how it works in the Arab world, that vacuum cleaner should not have been in public outside of it's box, it's just enticing easily enticeable men.

        [–]CreditKnifeMan 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

        But... Dirt Devil's got those double D's

        [–]hfxB0oyA 1 insightful - 2 fun1 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

        Adds new dimension to the phrase "do the vacuuming".