For me it was twice, but not PiV sex, which I could never bring myself to do, and I cried afterwards both times and wondered what was wrong with me. I never had a boyfriend, and I never even kissed any of my "dates." This idea that you're either gold-star or living some "dating and fucking dudes" sex-and-the-city lifestyle before coming out just seems so weird to me.

I have seen the whole "I've had a dozen boyfriends, but the last one cheated on me, so I'm gay now" in grosser places like LBL, but I never saw it on TL. Gross if so. Ugh.

It seems pretty common from what I noticed of several users from truelesbians and many other lesbian spaces.

Huh, that's kind of fascinating. I will admit, I was only on TL like a week before it was banned, so idk how much it differed from here.

the "I fucked a dude once when I was young and never again" type of stories.

I feel like that situation is likely happen out of different reasons/motivations than repeatedly seeking out dudes, though. If I'm trying a food that's new, I might try it once out of curiosity and if it's gross I stop eating it; I don't try it another 10 times, lol. Unless someone were forcing me to keep trying it, of course (and then you have a situation of coercion). (edit: Or unless I am very unaware of my body's reaction to that food. This is where mental illness steps in. Many disorders have as a symptom a lack of ability to recognize one's bodily sensations or emotions. And mental illness is prevalent among lesbians, so this is a pretty relevant detail.) A common societal message directed at lesbians is: "You have to try dick in order to be sure you don't like it." If you have a given group of lesbians, I'm sure some have the boundaries/personality traits/whatever to say, "Fuck no" even if they're being pressured, but some might be pressured into it and try it once. Or multiple times if they live in a homophobic family/religion with threat of violence, etc., and are trying to prove to someone that they are straight in order to avoid repercussions.

I could see how your perspective is a lot different if in your country where you grew up, there was a lot more pressure of "saving yourself until marriage". In fact-- I wouldn't be surprised if among "non-goldstars" from your country, they are more likely to NOT be lesbians, than "non-goldstars" from USA, because there would have been little pressure for them to try dating men first, and it would've been more likely that it happened voluntarily. (Correct me if I've misrepresented your country's views.)