DiscussionBi men in gay spaces – examples of constant homophobia, misinformation and undermining our definitions

submitted by lazy-summer-godSuper Gay from (self.LGBDropTheT)

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[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 4 insightful - 3 fun4 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 3 fun -  (26 children)

To complicate matters, if the opportunity were presented to me under the right circumstances (the biggest hypothetical condition being that I was not in a monogamous relationship), I would consider messing around with a trans-man who had a functional vagina. I don't consider myself meaningfully bisexual, i.e. probably 5.9 on the Kinsey scale. But it would be an opportunity to see what vaginal sex was like while all the other boxes were ticked. I would very likely not be interested in a LTR with a trans-man because I like le coque too much.

But for me the issue is one of consent and personal choice. It's presumptuous to assume that any gay man must consider trans-men as part of their dating pool or even their hookup pool. If some gay men are interested: cool. It has nothing to do with my interest level or that of any other gay man.

[–]thump 18 insightful - 1 fun18 insightful - 0 fun19 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

A man who is interested in hooking up with a transman, but primary forms long term relationships with men is still a bisexual man.

[–]IridescentAnacondastrictly dickly 7 insightful - 4 fun7 insightful - 3 fun8 insightful - 4 fun -  (2 children)

I would be cautious about telling a person who they are while participating in a forum whose principal focus seems to be criticizing others who are doing the same.

[–]Neo_Shadow_LurkerPronouns: I/Don't/Care 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

They're right though.

If we start to concede definitions used to describe ourselves and communicate with each other just to not hurt the feelings of some people, then we lose the capability of describing ourselves and comunicate with each other.

The words 'gay' and 'lesbian' aren't just cool social clubs, but political signifiers.

This is not rocket science.

[–]thump 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Same-sex attraction is based on biology. A man occasionally enjoying sex with a female, no matter how much she has altered her body, while mostly dating men is still being a bisexual man. This is one of a very few hardline stances I have, and what I'm sure most here do as well.

[–]Neo_Shadow_LurkerPronouns: I/Don't/Care 16 insightful - 2 fun16 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

trans-man who had a functional vagina

lmao!

That's a good joke!

T completely destroys the female reproductive system, even in the short term use.

If your objective is to satiate some bi-curiosity, just go for a women already.

[–]shveya 9 insightful - 2 fun9 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

True, the Aidens even complain of vaginal-dryness, and that’s only the tip of the iceberg.

[–]Neo_Shadow_LurkerPronouns: I/Don't/Care 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

And this isn't even the worst part yet, as there's whe whole uterus rotting thingy which basicly puts a hard 5 year cap for the hypersectomy.

FtMs may 'pass' better, but the price is high.

[–]lazy-summer-godSuper Gay[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Please, stop. I'm the opposite of squeamish, but you're somehow triggering me.

[–]shveya 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I thought about that too, their uteruses (uteri?) falling through their "front holes" seems like something out of "The Fly" (Jeff Goldblum's body pars start rotting off).

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

If you want to try pussy, go for normal women. If I wanted to see how does ti feel to be penis penetrated, I would go for normal man, not castrated one

[–]lazy-summer-godSuper Gay[S] 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I think it's time to remove that "super" from your flair, champ.

[–]PatsyStoneMaverique 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

If this guy is bi, every Stacy and Becky on Twitter who haven't been near another woman's pussy in their lives are too.

You can't have it both ways.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (11 children)

You could try out a vagina if you want, but you’re still having sex with a woman. If it helps you to understand your orientation better, so be it. But if you enjoyed it, you’re bisexual, you may still prefer men but you’re still bi. If you don’t enjoy it, then you know you’re gay.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (10 children)

Do you think we need to sleep with opposite sex to know our orientation?

[–]lazy-summer-godSuper Gay[S] 5 insightful - 3 fun5 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

aLL vIrGiNs ArE aSeXuaL!

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

No. Gay people know that they’re gay without having to sleep with the opposite sex. There are people who are confused, and maybe sleeping would help, though I wouldn’t recommend it.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I recommend it. I don't see the problem of fucking the opposite sex if you feel like it and want to get the experience. I don't need it, because I know I'm not into dick. But if I had some doubt I would do it no problem.

[–]TransspeciesUnicornI sexually identify as a mythical sparkly equine 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I would personally not recommend risking pregnancy just for the lulz.

I would also not recommend potentially stringing along a straight person who could develop feelings for you only for you to be like "Oh whoops, guess I'm gay after all."

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 2 insightful - 5 fun2 insightful - 4 fun3 insightful - 5 fun -  (1 child)

There are condoms and hookup is just genitalia humping for one time. We're not talking marriage. Sex isn't sacred, and if you want the experience you should do it.

[–]TransspeciesUnicornI sexually identify as a mythical sparkly equine 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Condoms aren't foolproof. I knew a chick in high school who was still conceived even though her parents were using a condom AND birth control. Also, it's not entirely uncommon for dudes to intentionally slip condoms off.

And well, if you're a woman, having random hookups with strange men can carry a whole other set of risks. Like they find your dismembered corpse in the woods three weeks later sort of risks.

[–]RedEyedWarriorGay | Male | 🇮🇪 Irish 🇮🇪 | Antineoliberal | Cocks are Compulsory 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Good point. I know I’m not into women, and not into vagina, but some people don’t know.

[–]thump 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

You're missing the point. Sexual attraction is what causes one to be interested in sex with another person.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Yeah I know. There are people who seems to be sure whether they like to have sex with some kind of genitalia before living it.

[–]thump 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I thought that was the case with everyone I find it impossible to fully understand, but I guess the human mind is complex enough.

[–]PatsyStoneMaverique 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I don't see what the point of you identifying as bisexual would be. It is not a meaningful Identity for you.

[–]lazy-summer-godSuper Gay[S] 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

He can't identify as homosexual, because he will be sending the wrong message that gay men can be somewhat attracted to females. That's redefinition of homosexuality and I'm surprised to see it suggested here, since it's the favorite TRA rhetoric.