"If lesbians can learn to accept trans women, why are gay men being so shitty to trans men?"

submitted by lazy-summer-godSuper Gay from (self.LGBDropTheT)

https://www.reddit.com/r/askgaybros/comments/ibx7zu/if_lesbians_can_learn_to_accept_trans_women_why/ Reddit's descent into insanity continues.

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[–]bastetkat 93 insightful - 37 fun93 insightful - 36 fun94 insightful - 37 fun -  (1 child)

Them:bans all the lesbians

Also them: "See? They can learn to accept transwomen"

[–]oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡ 33 insightful - 10 fun33 insightful - 9 fun34 insightful - 10 fun -  (0 children)

Exactly 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

[–]Gearbeta 76 insightful - 17 fun76 insightful - 16 fun77 insightful - 17 fun -  (14 children)

Lol this idiot thinks that real lesbians accept and date transwomen. Yeah ok sure buddy just keep telling yourself that. Also lol at them saying "you can buy a penis at the sex shop for 20 bucks" that's not a penis idiot.

[–]reluctant_commenter 33 insightful - 6 fun33 insightful - 5 fun34 insightful - 6 fun -  (13 children)

Probably because they are unaware that there are way more trans lesbians and bisexuals in AL than cis lesbians. It puzzles me, but somehow trans people seem to think that trans people are a high % of the population, when all evidence indicates otherwise.

Women are an oppressed group-- and men face a lot of gender-related difficulties specific to them, those things are not mutually exclusive

Thanks for the laugh. It is amazing to me how divorced these people are from reality.

[–]lavender_menace 26 insightful - 2 fun26 insightful - 1 fun27 insightful - 2 fun -  (10 children)

I think they are aware, but pretend it’s not like that. This way they can show those subs around and pretend the lies they tell are actually true.

  • Lesbians accept transwomen as lesbians.
  • Lesbians like dick.
  • Transvagina resembles real vagina, so there is literally no difference.

edit: formatting

[–]reluctant_commenter 21 insightful - 5 fun21 insightful - 4 fun22 insightful - 5 fun -  (8 children)

I think they are aware, but pretend it’s not like that.

I do think a substantial portion of them are like this, but a lot of them are actual children (or quite young). It's hard sometimes to tell what the motivations are of people online-- but at least, for the trans people I have met IRL, most of them do actually seem to believe that being trans is very common.

I talked to a psychology professor who had several students tell her they thought that like 20% of the population is trans. Lol.

[–]lavender_menace 14 insightful - 2 fun14 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 2 fun -  (7 children)

It is a common human bias, we think that most / many people are like us. Some of LGB people think that more than 4% are non-hetero. Some smart people believe a lot of people around them are smart and then they get disillusioned when they discover it not to be true at all.

[–]reluctant_commenter 11 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 2 fun -  (6 children)

Well, I believe that more than 4% are non-hetero, but not 20%. I could see 6-10%. There is some limited evidence to support this that I could dig up, if you're curious.

Some smart people believe a lot of people around them are smart and then they get disillusioned when they discover it not to be true at all.

Haha, yes unfortunately.

[–]lavender_menace 15 insightful - 4 fun15 insightful - 3 fun16 insightful - 4 fun -  (1 child)

I meant ridiculously high numbers like 20% 😉 Or even 50, you probably heard this bold claim “all women are bi” at least once in your life.

[–]reluctant_commenter 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Hahaha you are right, sorry I am splitting hairs. :)

[–]soundsituationI myself was once a gay 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I could see 6-10%. There is some limited evidence to support this that I could dig up, if you're curious.

I'm curious!

[–]reluctant_commenter 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

Sorry, I forgot to respond to this!

Okay, I actually had another source I was thinking of, but this is also relevant.

Survey data from GLAAD:

Someone else on this sub did a nice breakdown of it. https://saidit.net/s/LGBDropTheT/comments/625t/i_made_charts_from_2017_glaad_survey_data_showing/

First graph they made, suggests that about 8% of those ages 18-34 are not trans identified and are bisexual/homosexual, so LGB. You'll notice that percentage has grown with time-- I think a large part of that is increased evidence. Although some people have suggested that there are more people identifying as bisexual/lesbian who actually are not (comphet phenomenon). https://m.imgur.com/WSRBDsA

2nd graph they made: Suggests 3% of people are LG, and another 5% or so are bisexual, so 8% range. (You'll notice that 20% of the youngest age range marked "LGBTQ" but 12% of those are trans.. some of whom MAY be LGB but many others are likely straight with a fetish. Ray Blanchard has suggested that, at least among trans-identified males in the US, many are likely heterosexual, but that is not necessarily true worldwide.) https://m.imgur.com/55YuCqp

Also here's an article about the 10% number if you're curious, but it's from 2015 and doesn't have much new information, more just pointing out that some people are probably in denial given the huge discrepancy between people who identify as LGB, and people who report sexual contact / having sex with the same sex but don't identify as LGB. https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.theguardian.com/society/2015/apr/05/10-per-cent-population-gay-alfred-kinsey-statistics

[–]soundsituationI myself was once a gay 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

This is amazing, thank you! Entirely new information to me.

[–]reluctant_commenter 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

No problem!! :)

[–]luckystar 7 insightful - 3 fun7 insightful - 2 fun8 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

The idea that nobody could tell the difference between a vaginoplasty and the real deal just boggles the mind. They might as well say nobody knows the difference between a prosthetic hand and a real hand.

[–]yishengqingwa666Adult Human Female 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

"CIS" is a bullshit trans cult word that means nothing. Cisgender, either male or female (which is invariably used pejoratively) is a modern pseudo word which has no working etymology but attempts to force some other scientific etymology (relating to molecular chemistry) to serve an entirely erroneous purpose. It is an attempt to define in terms that have nothing to do with those being defined so as to make those so described seem parallel with those who have "chosen" to define otherly. Which explains why many of us call it out as abusive (which it is) whenever we see it.

[–]reluctant_commenter 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I agree. Believe it or not, I actually didn't even think about the fact that I used "cis lesbians" implying that there are lesbians who are not female-born homosexuals.

I'll edit my comment, thank you for the reminder. :) These words have a way of sneaking into our common language usage even when we don't realize it.

[–]Rosefield 52 insightful - 41 fun52 insightful - 40 fun53 insightful - 41 fun -  (1 child)

In genderspecials language:

  • 👏 You 👏 CAN'T 👏 UNLEARN 👏 SAME SEX 👏 ATTRACTION!! 👏

  • UwU Lesbian & gays are totally super duper valid !!! UwU

  • -angry leave lesbians & gays alone noises-

  • My pronouns: trans women/are/men

  • My gender: TransGayConversiontherapyIsGross-gender

  • My Flag: Blue for: date each other you sick homophobic fucks, Orange for: Lesbians don't like dick & gay men don't like vag, Pink for: Down with Trans-homophobes, Brown for: Fuck off homophobes, Black for: It's all so tiresome,

  • I have drop the T gender euphoria

  • Today I wore a skirt for the first time & jerked off to the thought of trans homophobes leaving gay people alone

[–]hatsofpotato 18 insightful - 12 fun18 insightful - 11 fun19 insightful - 12 fun -  (0 children)

Yo, just wanted you to know that I'm dying laughing at this!!

You're a pro at the genderspecials language.

[–]MezozoicGayoldschool gay 54 insightful - 12 fun54 insightful - 11 fun55 insightful - 12 fun -  (4 children)

So how does lesbians accepted transwomen? By being removed from reddit? Are they asking gay men to leave reddit as well?

[–]oofreesouloo⚡super lesbian⚡ 42 insightful - 1 fun42 insightful - 0 fun43 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Exactly... Most real lesbians have been banned or shut down or harassed etc etc

[–][deleted] 27 insightful - 1 fun27 insightful - 0 fun28 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Yup the smaller subreddit r/truegaymen was not banned but r/truelesbians was.

[–]NutterButterFlutterStill waving into the void 21 insightful - 2 fun21 insightful - 1 fun22 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

I expect r/TrueGayMen to go down eventually. All of its posts and comments are being reported, and Admins have already removed 2 things (presumably under the new content policy).

One was this, a 3 month old post ... which interestingly enough, they DID NOT remove from the cross-posted sub: https://www.reddit.com/r/TrueGayMen/comments/gf7y9q/gynocentrism_in_education_in_policy_funding

[–]florasisHOMOSEXUAL FEMALE/Pussy is my God and I'm monotheist 14 insightful - 6 fun14 insightful - 5 fun15 insightful - 6 fun -  (0 children)

In their reality, if they can't see something it doesn't exist. So they ban people and pretend the world agree with them

[–]a_blue_bird 42 insightful - 14 fun42 insightful - 13 fun43 insightful - 14 fun -  (3 children)

a trans woman can resemble a cis woman in every way

Show me one. Just one.

[–]Rosefield 20 insightful - 22 fun20 insightful - 21 fun21 insightful - 22 fun -  (0 children)

Well just watch anime! Checkmate bigot!

[–][deleted] 15 insightful - 2 fun15 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I'm almost convinced these people haven't seen the results of neovagina surgery. They are not vaginas. Anyone who can't see that is in denial. And even if the appearance manages to pass, the surgery results function nothing like the vagina or vulva at all.

[–]TurkishCoffee 14 insightful - 2 fun14 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

That's the odd part. There's some really bizarre delusion going on. I completely will agree, that clothes on, or even top-off, a transwoman might pass for cis. Sometimes. Not always. but it's possible. There are certainly transwomen who transitioned early in life and put enough effort in that I cannot easily from a photo identify them. So sure.

But there are TONS of trans women and TRAs who insist that once the pants come off, even a gyn can't tell! which is absurd. An ob/gyn isn't going to notice you lack a cervix? or that you have lots of surgical scars down there? come off it! Also that the average person "cant" tell either. I really have my doubts about that. (But i have no intentions of getting into bed with a transwoman ever, even if my current exclusive relationship ends, to find out first hand).

[–][deleted] 43 insightful - 9 fun43 insightful - 8 fun44 insightful - 9 fun -  (16 children)

I love how they contrast the "good lesbians" and those evil TERFs. Just ban all the female homosexuals then BAM all you are left with are good lesbians.

Also that comment that said that "transwomen can resemble cis women in every way", ugh 😒 Yeah of course they do to you cuz you are an actual gay man and if it really was true then you should have no problems with "trans gay men".

Im honestly enjoying this shitshow I knew they were gonna come after gay men eventually. I just didnt think it would happen so soon after the ban. Thankfully, I dont think there is any way that the sub can be banned and I hope the straight women get bullied off soon.

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries" 32 insightful - 4 fun32 insightful - 3 fun33 insightful - 4 fun -  (2 children)

They actually said “good lesbians.” Wow.

[–]hatsofpotato 22 insightful - 5 fun22 insightful - 4 fun23 insightful - 5 fun -  (1 child)

"You're one of the good ones"

[–]yousaythosethingsFind and Replace "gatekeeping" with "having boundaries" 23 insightful - 11 fun23 insightful - 10 fun24 insightful - 11 fun -  (0 children)

But being a bad lesbian with “violent” vaginal gatekeeping tendencies sounds more fun if my reward for being good is having to suffer those trifling fools.

[–]shveya 32 insightful - 2 fun32 insightful - 1 fun33 insightful - 2 fun -  (12 children)

I think they're already starting to bully off straight women, they did come for r/pcos, after all.

[–]hatsofpotato 25 insightful - 5 fun25 insightful - 4 fun26 insightful - 5 fun -  (9 children)

Hold up, they're in /r/pcos now?!?

I only visit there every so often. Wtf happened?

How can a man experience PCOS?!

AHhhhhhhHHH

[–]Gearbeta 33 insightful - 6 fun33 insightful - 5 fun34 insightful - 6 fun -  (5 children)

TRAs have entirely taken over the sub now so now you can't say things like "hey girls" without getting it removed.

[–]hatsofpotato 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm seeing red...

[–]marmorsymphata 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

How does this shit even happen? What are they doing, paying OG mods to be replaced?

[–]Gearbeta 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Its not clear but it appears that some users may have sought out the assistance of the reddit admins to remove the existing mods and they were replaced. https://saidit.net/s/GenderCritical/comments/58wt/what_happened_on_rpcos_in_screenshots/ https://saidit.net/s/GenderCritical/comments/58wt/what_happened_on_rpcos_in_screenshots/jwje

[–]ItsBondageTime 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Why dont women make a sub and dont let transwomen join or become mod?

[–]Gearbeta 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

People tried to make r/truePCOS to do just that, the sub was banned in minutes.

[–][deleted] 20 insightful - 2 fun20 insightful - 1 fun21 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

The banned pcos and pregnancy during the reddit ban (before putting them back up shortly after) for using female exclusive language or something. Now pcos has a trans woman mod (which makes no sense... they wouldn't even have ovaries?!?!). Like wtf, of course all the people on pcos and pregnancy will be female lol. These people are bullies and like, flat earther levels of stupid.

[–]marmorsymphata 20 insightful - 1 fun20 insightful - 0 fun21 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

The number of perfectly reasonable comments that were removed from the mod announcement just because they disagreed is INSANE.

https://www.removeddit.com/r/PCOS/comments/hmlhjc/rpcos_is_an_inclusive_community/

These people are tyrants, NOT social justice advocates.

[–]shveya 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I don't know the whole story, but I think they had to go private because women who ID as "non binary" or "transmen" were having tantrums over something or other. There's a new r/pcos that panders to women who don't want to be women.

[–][deleted] 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Oh I was talking about the gay men getting straight women off of their sub. Yeah I hear about the r/pcos thing and its messed up.

[–]shveya 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Oh, I gotcha! Yeah, the straight women harassing gay men would have called themselves "f*g hags" a decade ago.

[–]saged 38 insightful - 3 fun38 insightful - 2 fun39 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

Again here they go with the, "Everyone but YOU is with the program, Terfs are the crazy ones, lesbians love us!!" until next week it's "Everyone hates us and LGB is full of terfs and transphobes!"

Lesbians had no CHoicE in accepting transwomen, at least in 95% of online spaces. Men just came into women spaces and forced them not only to accept them in that space, but maybe even consider dating them or at the very least say you would. Then all the women who don't want to be apart of it just leave, are shunned or flat out banned, so it's left with 75% transbiens and very few lesbians. Look at reddit, almost every reddit for females has trans women as mods, every female reddit has rules to accept transwomen or get lost. You can get banned for saying certain things about trans folxs. It wasn't accepting. It wasn't learned. It was get with the program or get out.

Straight men aren't forced to accept transwomen as women/spouses, but lesbians and gays are? Every single, "Would you date a transwoman?" post when it's focused toward men is a question, with lesbians/gays it's, "It's okay not to want to date us, but you are transphobic if your reasoning is..."

[–]lavender_menace 17 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I imagine after they are done with the gays they’ll start bothering straight women and then straight men until this madness stops.

[–]marmorsymphata 13 insightful - 2 fun13 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Them pretending like anti-trans-dogma isn't the default for the majority of the population and that "transphobia" only originates from specific communities-- and thus simply cannot be endemic to an existing men's or women's sub-- is such a pathetic and obvious cope.

[–]8bitgay 37 insightful - 1 fun37 insightful - 0 fun38 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

These people talk as if they're being banned from gay subs. As if somehow mods are looking through their profiles, seeing that they post in trans subs, and then banning them for it.

I've never seen an issue of a trans person commenting on gay subs in regular posts and then being replied something like "omg you're trans, get out of here!!!". They aren't even being unwelcomed.

But if you create thread after thread of "I'm trans, would you date me?", don't expect people to all answer yes. They pretend to be asking a question and be interested in honest answers but won't accept honest answers.

[–]les4leshomonormative 22 insightful - 2 fun22 insightful - 1 fun23 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Members of these subreddits are getting more aggressive because they're being brigaded with these kinds of baiting, bad-faith posts. This is their own damn fault

[–]8bitgay 16 insightful - 1 fun16 insightful - 0 fun17 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah. It's kinda like dating. If you try approaching people, sometimes you'll get rejected. It doesn't mean they hate you, but they have no obligation to be interested in you. If you take the rejection gracefully, maybe you can even be friends.

But if you keep harassing someone, don't be surprised that the person reacts in more energic ways and starts to call you out.

[–]PassionateIntensity 33 insightful - 4 fun33 insightful - 3 fun34 insightful - 4 fun -  (0 children)

Lesbians haven't accepted you, you've physically threatened them into hiding and silence. Tiny little girls in mustaches don't physically intimidate men.

[–]reluctant_commenter 22 insightful - 10 fun22 insightful - 9 fun23 insightful - 10 fun -  (0 children)

Does anyone else find it hilarious that transmen keep saying "bro"?

"Bro. Bro. BRO." Like, dude, saying "bro" does not make you more of a man. I say "bro" all the time and I'm a woman lol.

[–]BonesRedsMy pronouns are Yu/Gi/Oh! 26 insightful - 1 fun26 insightful - 0 fun27 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Those comments... I feel terrible for the harassment gay men are getting from trans people now. I can't believe all these straight women won't just find a straight man to be with. Why would they attack gay men for not being attracted to the female body? Why do they choose to take this path of conversion therapy and shaming? I swear I'm re-peaking every day lol.

[–]lazy-summer-godSuper Gay[S] 30 insightful - 1 fun30 insightful - 0 fun31 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I feel terrible for the harassment gay men are getting from trans people now.

Don't. They need this to wake up and start taking actions against it.

[–]ChunkeeguyTeam T*RF Fuck Yeah 22 insightful - 1 fun22 insightful - 0 fun23 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Gay man here totally agreeing. It’s happening.

[–]Rosefield 19 insightful - 2 fun19 insightful - 1 fun20 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

I can't believe all these straight women won't just find a straight man to be with.

If they ruined & changed their bodies with steroids then that's most likely the case because straight men aren't attracted to that.

[–]Gearbeta 27 insightful - 2 fun27 insightful - 1 fun28 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Most of the uwu transmen who harass gay men don't make any attempt to look masculine at all. Most of them wouldn't even qualify as tomboys. Its similar to how AGP type transwomen are often lazy and make no attempt to look feminine sometimes not even bothering to shave their 5 o'clock shadows.

[–]ItsBondageTime 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You know on tv you often have a female character that says, "Damn, why are all the good men taken or gay?" Thats basically why. They think gay men are better than straight

[–]Q-Continuum-kin 20 insightful - 9 fun20 insightful - 8 fun21 insightful - 9 fun -  (0 children)

Dammit I just laughed out loud at work over this exchange

Doesn't take science not to be a prick.

But it does take science not to be an uneducated clown

[–]lavender_menace 19 insightful - 1 fun19 insightful - 0 fun20 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

What makes my skin crawl is this demand that people exclude their own to accommodate trans.

Yeah but lesbians don’t claim them. They kick them out and keep the good lesbians who accept others around. Gay men should be doing the same.

They employ this technique, used by translesbians in the 70:

forced teaming is a term employed by those who work on abuse, grooming and predation. It was originally coined by Gavin De Becker in his work The Gift of Fear […] The predator will create the idea that there is a shared goal, or an attitude of we are all in this together, we are allies, in order to disarm, gain trust and manipulate his target. Elliott managed to get lesbians and women to abuse other lesbians and women over the idea of male inclusion, it was tactical, ‘predators use forced teaming to recruit co-conspirators to fight their battles and do their bidding’. The Gutter Dykes recognised this. They stated that ‘the truth of the matter is that certain lesbians have been so taken in by his pathetic lie of “growing up female” trapped in a male body that they will stand behind him and fight for him — even against other lesbians’. It is the old ‘male trick of pitting women against one another to fight men’s battles has been used since the beginning of patriarchy.

[–]LiterallyawomanTERF IRL 12 insightful - 2 fun12 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Ah yes real lesbians like the transwoman who mysteriously is “invisible” to the lesbian community

[–]psufanof2631 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

God I'm just so tired of this bullshit. Their entire strategy is to just throw all this crap at you until you eventually get sick of it. Glad to see some gay guys pushing back.

[–]hufflepuff-poet 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Why do I have to "learn to accept" someone into my dating life? Dating is inherently exclusionary and saying otherwise is rape-y af. Why do these people want someone who doesn't want them--it's not love if you had to shame them into it..

[–]LiterallyawomanTERF IRL 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

You must recondition yourself to sexually desire people who repulse you and if not you’re a BAD person

[–][deleted] 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I wonder if they will ban askgaybros or perhaps that would show them up to be the homophobes they are because the sub is too well-known?

[–]HelloMomo 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

There is a "why" of sorts, thought, and we all know it. Female socialization vs male socialization. Women have been taught to be nice and accommodating of others, while men are more likely to put their foot down.