I just got broken up with because my girlfriend decided she is trans.

submitted by TarshishJupiter from self.GenderCritical

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[–]jkfinn 13 insightful - 1 fun13 insightful - 0 fun14 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I'm just curious about her aversion to "wife," and you're mentioning the term "propose" a couple times. Was this meant to be an equal relationship? If so, why the "proposal" idea, which I assume means marriage. Is it possible she's opposed to being a "wife" in a marriage? Or that she's opposed to marriage just as millions of straight women are. Also, are you the one assumed to do the “proposing?” Or, could she have also done so all along?

None of this need be answered, of course. That said, the rest does seem to indicate a long relationship lost to the trans cult. Which can probably best be overcome by doubling down on the criticism of trans.--after or during a short or long recovery. And may that period be as brief as possible, because we all know what that’s like.

[–]TarshishJupiter[S] 15 insightful - 1 fun15 insightful - 0 fun16 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Thanks for your response. We were going back and forth about who would propose - or whether we should even do a "proposal". When I said in the post that I wanted to propose, I guess it was shorthand for feeling ready to consider marriage.

I think she has an aversion to female-specific terms because she grew up with heavily conservative parents who even sent her to a summer camp that was basically "being a good wife class".

[–]MarkTwainiac 14 insightful - 1 fun14 insightful - 0 fun15 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

So sorry for your pain, OP. Breakups and heartache are hard.

she grew up with heavily conservative parents who even sent her to a summer camp that was basically "being a good wife class".

I found this info fits with what I know of a good number of girls/women (and boys/men) who get caught up in the trans craze. Some/many people raised with ultra-conservative sex stereotypes & roles like your ex develop a lifelong allergy and aversion to all restrictive, regressive ideologies after rejecting the beliefs they grew up with.

Back in the 70s and 80s, young people used to joke that many of us raised in homes where we were indoctrinated into various ideologies - whether strict Roman Catholicism, orthodox Judaism, Mormonism, Islam, US Bible Belt evangelical Christianity, secular right-wing Republicanism, "red diaper" communism and socialism, and even the (seemingly) anything-goes ethos of the Beats and later the hippies - had come out of our upbringings "vaccinated against dogma" - all dogma.

But at the same time, there were always a good number of young people from such backgrounds who at first thoroughly rejected the doctrinaire belief systems they were raised with and lived as apostates for a while, only to turn around after a spell and embrace another crippling, constricting cult such as Hare Krishna, the Moonies, People's Temple, EST, the Rajneeshis, SYDA, Gurumayi and so on.

For so many today, genderism is the new cult, and "transitioning" is the new set of ritual practices that promises salvation and rebirth as one's better, happier, higher self.

Again, sorry for your troubles. I hope you have friends to support you. It's trite to say, I know, but time does heal.

[–]TarshishJupiter[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I appreciate your response. It does seem very true that there are some people from dogmatic backgrounds that seem to embrace another dogma. I do have a few friends to support me, but one of them doesn't agree with homosexuality and therefore is hard to talk with about my relationship troubles (I grew up in conservative circles, and I'm still friends with this one person who is a very good and compassionate human being, despite not agreeing with me on almost anything).

[–]jkfinn 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I see. I thought this was probably true, but wasn't sure. May you work your way through this, which is at least one concrete motivation for holding to your gc stance.