How the social role of being a wife makes women depressed

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[–]Girlwiththeraventat 24 insightful - 1 fun24 insightful - 0 fun25 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Yes this is my life and its depressing as hell. I work a full time job, have a elementary age child and I'm going to college part time. But I'm still expected to clean the house, make the food, and take full care of the child. Meanwhile my husband thinks because he works a job that pays more, that's his only responsibility.

We have had argument after argument that I need more help around the house. Which pisses me off that it should even be considered "help". Its his house too. His excuse is men can't see the mess and it's not mens fault that women wanted to leave the house and get jobs.

So I either keep arguing about the same shit we've been arguing about for 10 years, accept that I am responsible for everything and everyone, or divorce him. If we do ever get divorced, I won't date or remarry. Theres just nothing in it for women.

[–][deleted]  (2 children)

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    [–]Realwoman 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

    Thankfully, there are exceptions. My husband does every single traditional male work around the house, he's done a lot of home improvements entirely on his own, he makes more than me and he never expects me to be cook or clean or anything. He doesn't even want me to fold his laundry when I do decide to do it. He likes to cook and he cooks more often than I do. He's even tidier than me, I'm more messy. No kids yet, but he was like that even when I was unemployed for many months and he was going to work. Once when he was working nights at 14-hour shifts and I wanted to spoil him by making him elaborate meals and after the second one he told me I don't need to put in that much effort. We do have issues in our marriage but gender role expectations are not one of them.

    [–]Aquadog 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

    Lucky! My husband views food as fuel and couldn't care less if something tastes good, so I always end up cooking for us. He does clean the kitchen up after me but it can be very mentally taxing to plan meals, shop, etc. and even though I love cooking I always worry about how our future will look with kids.