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[–]RestingWitchface 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

That feels natural, because we've been socialized to perform this.

You can fuck right off with this. I have never received any kind of praise or benefits for crying in front of someone. I have been called "crazy", "manipulative", "weak", and all manner of other things though. The idea that women's crying is manipulative is right out of the misogynist's handbook. My tears are not a "performance", they are in involuntary reaction to feeling a strong emotion.

[–]Lemonade_Masquerade 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Fucking THIS. This "women are allowed to cry, men aren't" is such bullshit. We aren't taken seriously when we cry, we are "over emotional" and "hysterical." I mean, sure, I guess little boys are told to "man up" when they cry, but that's about it. The entire world takes men's emotions more seriously than women. After all, look at that sad rapist. He feels bad for getting caught making a mistake! Let's not ruin the poor man's life!

I'm a crier. I can't help it. My mother would spank me if cried about something she deemed "unimportant" and it didn't make me less of a crier as I got older. It just ramps up my anxiety when I feel tears coming on now and I cry harder because I get more upset by the fact that I am crying.

[–]immersang 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm a crier. I can't help it. My mother would spank me if cried about something she deemed "unimportant" and it didn't make me less of a crier as I got older. It just ramps up my anxiety when I feel tears coming on now and I cry harder because I get more upset by the fact that I am crying.

Same. My mom wouldn't spank me but she also couldn't deal with it and would snap at me to "stop wailing". It didn't change anything. If I would have been able to basically switch a button to stop the waterworks from starting, I would have done so in a heartbeat.