And I have the utmost sympathy for people in your position. I bounced around from therapist to therapist trying to find out what was "wrong" with me. I paid out of pocket to a specialist for my diagnosis. The process really opened my eyes with how complicated it really was. I was screened for SPD because he said in adult women, we mask a lot and the disorder looks very similar to others. He's corrected a lot of misdiagnoses in the past from other disorders to ASD based on a lot of nuance. One example he gave was a woman that was diagnosed with BPD but he noticed her meltdowns subsided when whatever triggered her was removed. In BPD patients, the meltdown continues because its an emotional release, not a sensory meltdown. But they look the same at first.

I myself was screened for SPD to rule it out because a lot of my symptons could have placed me in that category.

Overall it was 5 hours of tests, interviews and questionnaires plus those results going to a board of professionals for me to be diagnosed with ASD with ADHD.

When I see someone who suspects they have ASD, I deeply feel for them and hope they get their DX and some peace of mind.

When I see someone that self-DXed... I lump them in non-binary and stargender people.