I feel like it's easier to sell the idea of a "male brain" to women who have autism, because people with autism are uncomfortable with ambiguity. When you try to fit in with a group of average women and fail, it's easier to think "oh I guess I just need to play this opposite role instead", compared to accepting that there is no set of rules that will feel comfortable for them. I'm sure it's at least partially wishful thinking. It's hard to accept social interaction is simply never going to be as instinctive to you as it is to a "normal" human being, no matter what stereotype you try to force yourself into. Because it's not their identity that is the problem, it's a problem with picking up on social cues and forming relationships in general. Changing what clothes you wear or what your pronouns are is not going to change that. Just because you aren't a neurotypical woman doesn't make you a neurotypical male. Both neurotypical women and men have social skills.