GC: What is the best or most important thing trans people or transsexuals can do to help you?

submitted by peakingatthemomentTranssexual (natal male), HSTS from self.GCdebatesQT

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[–]CatbugMods allow rape victim blaming in this sub :) 17 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Don’t speak for women, and stop speaking over us. Don’t ask women to be a shield against other men. Accept that women are a seperate group to which transwomen do not belong. Speak up against the activists who perpetuate misogyny like Blaire white does with fish comments or transhumanist creeps who act like they are owed women’s reproductive systems. Basically do what the other men are supposed to do and leave us alone.

[–]peakingatthemomentTranssexual (natal male), HSTS[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Thanks for sharing your thoughts!

Accept that women are a seperate group to which transwomen do not belong.

Do you feel like it’s bad or a boundary violation if someone who isn’t female passes as woman? I’m just trying to understand.

I’m not that familiar with Blaire White, but comments like that are very offensive and hurtful to me. Transhumanists and people with those tendencies all just seem like creepy narcissists, but sadly they seem common in online trans spaces.

[–]loveSloaneDebate King 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

It is a boundary violation imo. Absolutely yes.

[–]peakingatthemomentTranssexual (natal male), HSTS[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Oh dear! Okay, thanks..

[–]loveSloaneDebate King 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

I understand that there’s risk to outing yourself- my whole thing is, does the risk of outing yourself or othering yourself matter more than the personal boundaries of others? I feel like so many issues concerning transwomen come down to dismissing or respecting the boundaries of others. I also think the goal of trans people should be acceptance of trans people rather than concealment, but that’s a different conversation.

Eta- a TW friend being upfront with me would indicate to me that they respect my boundaries. Me finding out somehow that a friend of mine is a TW would indicate to me that they disregard those boundaries. This is just my perspective tho

[–]peakingatthemomentTranssexual (natal male), HSTS[S] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I understand that there’s risk to outing yourself- my whole thing is, does the risk of outing yourself or othering yourself matter more than the personal boundaries of others? I feel like so many issues concerning transwomen come down to dismissing or respecting the boundaries of others.

I don’t know... I hadn’t really thought that was violating a boundary for being perceived a certain way. It’s weird to think about because it not something you are actively doing, it’s happening because you are not actively making it not happen (if that makes sense).

I also think the goal of trans people should be acceptance of trans people rather than concealment, but that’s a different conversation.

Yeah, I feel that is like a major conversation. I’ve always appreciated that I was able to not be visible (and even not really think about it) because I feel like it helped someone like me have a better life, especially years back when there really no push for acceptance.

Eta- a TW friend being upfront with me would indicate to me that they respect my boundaries. Me finding out somehow that a friend of mine is a TW would indicate to me that they disregard those boundaries. This is just my perspective tho

Thanks for explaining! I only have one experience of coming out to a friend (and that’s an odd story) so I don’t know how everyone feels or would feel about it.

[–]loveSloaneDebate King 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I guess I feel like I’m thinking about it from the perspective of the person who would be being mislead (intentionally or not), not the person who would be concealing (intentionally or not). Again, there may be some people who feel differently, I just feel that personally, I think it would feel invasive and, depending on what was discussed, borderline voyeuristic. I get how a TW wouldn’t see it that way, but I can’t help but see it that way.