Why is it when somebody you want to text you doesn't and somebody who you don't give a shit about as much bombards you with texts?

submitted by gloomy_bear from self.AskSaidIt

Like when I wanted to connect with relatives, they didn't really make much effort, or a friend I haven't heard from since February. But if it's somebody you don't know IRL, they want to text you a lot or this one jackass I knew IRL who tried to catfish me and other people. I had to turn off my phone for that jackass, and I gave him both my tablet and phone number att thinking he was genuinely nice.

Fuck the 403 error

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[–]RedditButt 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (8 children)

People are like cats. They scurry away if you show interest in them, but the moment you ignore them, they're walking all over your keyboard.

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (7 children)

That makes sense!

[–]RedditButt 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

It also explains a bit how when people start to become aware of this, games like "playing hard to get" and all sorts of weird quirky behaviors emerge.

[–]SMCAB 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

People aren't like cats. Disordered people are like cats. Normal people have zero issue remaining in touch with you, and normal people can read the room and fuck off when they aren't wanted.

Texting is half the issue anyway, it feeds people's insecurities to type digital nothings into a device without human contact.

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Oh that makes a lot of sense. Explains the crap with asswipes like cluster b and C-PTSD/PTSD who act eerily like cluster b.

[–]SMCAB 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Everyone can get into a funk. I'll go through spells where I don't reach out as much. But the honest thing is, good people make time for the people they care about, it's that simple.

And someone who can't follow your boundaries, yeah fuck that, that's disordered.

It can just be massive insecurity as well, which isn't a disorder exactly, but the other people always pay for those insecurities.

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Yeah I think my friend might be going through something I don't know about. Somebody else told me they can sometimes not reach out for months, then to reach out again so maybe he's going through something like that.

[–]SMCAB 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Number one reason for distancing in chunks like that is depression I would say.

[–]gloomy_bear[S] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah he does have depression and both my best friend and another friend of mine hasn't talked to him in a while either.

[–]Mcheetah 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

If you treat people like commodities only to be used for your own personal expense, don't be surprised when all of them ghost you.

Regarding your personal story, that's not "somebody you don't want to text you;" that's just a stalker. (I have a few of my own on this site, apparently.)

[–]SMCAB 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Nobody is stalking you. How self-important are you? You just type really, really dumb shit, and can't handle the repercussions.