I fucking hate non binary as a designation for masculine lesbians.

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[–][deleted] 21 insightful - 1 fun21 insightful - 0 fun22 insightful - 1 fun -  (14 children)

That would be a dealbreaker for me because I consider it a sign of someone so self-absorbed/clueless/sheeple that I would truly have a hard time assimilating the fact that she is literally forcing the world to change specifically for her, and her own specialness feelings.

I genuinely think that non-binaries don’t see themselves as causing harm to women, and especially gnc lesbians, but just the fact that it is not even critically thought about is scary to me.

I completely understand WHY they identify that way, and how difficult it must be to be constantly othered ANYWAY, but it seems like they have almost no compassion for women apart from themselves, or are not intelligent enough to see the big picture and potential costs to women and gnc kids when they publicly renounce womanhood. It’s bad enough being their partner.

Where I live lots of femmes who dress in typical feminine stereotypical clothing etc also identify as non-binary and cry about how no one sees them as a they. It’s insufferable.

[–]yousaythosethings 17 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 0 fun18 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Yes yes yes. I know some super femme-presenting lesbians who call themselves non-binary. Like you, I get it and don’t get It. Like I see why they feel that way and I see also how it solves NOTHING for themselves and other women. They are still seen as the women they are by everyone. And don’t get me started on how can you be both non-binary and a lesbian unless you’re admitting sexual orientation is based on sex? The lesbians I know are really smart and well-educated, like doctors and lawyers. I think they just have a lot of blind faith in what LGBT orgs are telling them and they haven’t checked under the hood.

[–][deleted] 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Some of the smartest people I know are in the trans cult, but those same people also have issues and are quite selfish. So it’s true, it’s not that they are not smart as much as they have found something that speaks to them, that they can use to elevate their status and sense of belonging in the community, and that matters more than the impact of what they are supporting. So much cognitive dissonance

[–]yousaythosethings 11 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 0 fun12 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I will say that the “non-binary lesbians“ I know and am close to are lovely people and generally very empathetic. They just have a major blindspot in this area and are unable to see the consequences of their actions and what they support bc of their blind faith in LGBT orgs. They are def suffering from cognitive dissonance and I don’t think they are lost causes. I think they just need the right information provided to them at the right time by the right source and once there’s a crack in the foundation, it will all fall apart like it did for the rest of us (at least those who supported any of this at one point such as myself).

I think for them, the crack will come from Cotton Ceiling-style info from baby lesbians, bullying of baby lesbians for not being “inclusive” of penis, and information about what mainstream LGBT orgs are saying and not saying about homosexuality, specifically the questions they keep being asked and refuse to respond to. Or how like the National Lesbian Rights Center literally refuses to even mention the word “lesbian.” [Fun fact, I attended an event where the director of that org spoke and it was an absolute word salad woke mess and honestly scary at times bc she was talking about doctors needing to amass statistics on who is gay. I was humiliated that anyone would associate me with her or that org. I digress. . . .]

These people have a huge tolerance for bullshit but I firmly believe they will not tolerate creepy males or ANYONE sexually pressuring young lesbians. It hits too close to home. But to set up the right circumstances to effectively communicate reality to them, you basically need to do an inventory on all of the bullshit they are individually aware of that hasn’t peaked them yet. And also the areas where they are maybe willing to give a little.

This sounds like a Terfy Action Plan and informally it is. I just desperately need some normal lesbians in my life. So I am in the stage of testing out how much bullshit they’ve accepted.

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

the “non-binary lesbians“ I know and am close to are lovely people and generally very empathetic. They just have a major blindspot in this area and are unable to see the consequences of their actions and what they support bc of their blind faith in LGBT orgs.

this is my gf its so hard because shes lovely except for the nb thing

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Most of them have heard all of the arguments but are deeply indoctrinated. I was in those circles from 1999-2016 and I can say for sure that they have a rebuttal for every criticism on the subject. Mind you, my friend group has a lot of trans and non-binary types and they stand to lose all of their friends if they disagree with any of it. The younger generation is the one to break out of it, I honestly hope they are not so entrenched that they can’t get out. Many of the people I know are professional TRAs. Like writers and academics and therapists etc. They are IN for the long haul. And they are not evil people by any means, just easily manipulated by critical theory and queer theory stuff because so many of them have been living in academic bubbles for too long.

[–]yousaythosethings 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Ugh this is part of the problem. So many young people are making their “identity” a career. And those people are the most entrenched and have the most to gain by losing their goddamn minds. Like the peenbeings behind Pink News, and people like Munro Bergdorf and this new thing I’ve heard referred to as a Jacob Tobia.

[–]votkriscan 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I would say it's mostly anglophone countries steeped in LGBTQ stuff. Outside of that, very femme-presenting lesbians will either not care to call themselves such terms or they are extremely proud of being a woman.

[–]florasis 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (6 children)

Even feminine lesbians. That's strange. What a mess

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Yeah. It’s pretty annoying. How dare someone think a femme looks like a woman. Lol

[–]florasis 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I think is because they don't fully commit to stupid gender stereotype, despite being feminine in look. Anyways, very retarded. Remember the video of a woman saying she was neither boy or girl because she liked to also use stereotypical male clothes, and not just female ones? LMAO. Imaging being so idiotic to think sex is based on a piece of cloth. And then she was married to a trans man and her poor daughter was being raised gender neutral and already showing sign of dysphoria :/

[–][deleted] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Non-binary is more of a fashion statement than anything. Lol. It’s true

[–]florasis 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

It's a statament to prove you're an idiot. I have an advice for the poor lesbians here: date older. Older women are interesting and they are less influenced bu trend :D Don't limit yourself to close in age.

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Older women are less likely to put up with your shit, too. Lol

[–]florasis 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I like challeging characters lol