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[–]reluctant_commenter 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm not saying that it's impossible for a lesbian to somehow end up suffering quietly for years in a heterosexual relationship, especially in more repressive parts of society, but she is not doing so because she has no idea she's a lesbian.

That's what happened to me (although only for a few years, and I was not married). I know that might seem pretty crazy, and I'm really glad it sounds like that didn't happen to you. But that's how it was for me, and I'm not a political lesbian, I'm not even very political at all. I don't think it's that rare. But I would be curious to see what the actual breakdown in numbers is.