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[–]Dykexmachina 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

I'm sorry about the loss of your mother. I hope you're doing okay.

You are definitely not overreacting. Your gf is acting really shady. Her feelings and intentions were very clear in her conversations with A and in the way she talked about A. I think she's most likely lying about wanting to take revenge on A by regecting her back. Even if she wasn't lying, that'd be such a ridiculous and immature thing to do, "reject someone back", like come on she's 28 years old ffs.

It's not "just text messages" when 2 people who have clearly wanted to hook up with each other are having flirty/intimate conversations behind their partner's backs. Plus your gf was talking about her feelings for the girl behind your back. A's girlfriend had a right to know what was going on, and you had every right to ask her friends and find out more about what was happening. You did the right thing in my opinion. You were just trying to get to the whole truth of the situation, because obviously your girlfriend can't be trusted to give you that.

She shouldn't be telling you how to act either. I'm sorry but your gf sounds toxic. Unless she somehow moves on from the other girl and starts treating you with more respect and honesty, I'd say be careful and trust your instincts, and especially don't allow her or her friends make you feel crazy for being upset about something that any normal human being would be upset about.

[–][deleted] 10 insightful - 3 fun10 insightful - 2 fun11 insightful - 3 fun -  (2 children)

Even if she WAS trying to “reject her back” (which is the dumbest idiot dyke player excuse I’ve ever heard and I would laugh directly in her face as I was throwing her shit into a garbage bag), what the fuck is she doing being so fixated on some other woman when she’s with a new person? There is literally no way she can cover her dumb ass. Lololol

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

yeah, there's really no getting around it. a healthy and mature person doesn't plot revenge on someone who romantically rejected them. hell, even an unhealthy and immature person who is happy in a new relationship doesn't do that. this is a huge red flag, OP. like Chernobyl huge.

[–][deleted] 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah, it’s like a red flag signalling the army of orcs arriving at helms deep. It’s is impossible to find anything reasonable about it. Happy people are not fixated on taken women, fixated on revenge, or fixated on people who rejected them. None of those things indicate this person is honest, mature, healthy, or happy. I wouldn’t be able to boot her fast enough.