I think it’s a numbers game as much as a male vs. female socialization game. Reddit is a male-dominant website in terms of the user base. As usual, trans people tend to track more on par with their sex than their gender, so that means that within the trans population, the male sex (MTF) predominates over the female sex (FTM). Gay men seem to outnumber gay-appropriating trans men but lesbians are waaaay outnumbered by transbians. Not to mention that terminally online males seem to be transing at an alarming rate.

So even before you get to male socialization where the natural reaction is to make jokes and point out the absurdity of the situation vs. female socialization which is to tie oneself in knots to be accommodating and indirect, lesbians will always lose based on numbers.

But yes the admins and mods tend to be predominantly male across all gay and trans Reddit spaces and they do absolutely treat female insolence as much more intolerable.