RantLGBTQ memes are full of stereotypes and group-signaling, not actual lived experiences

submitted by reluctant_commenter from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]HelloMomo 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (6 children)

As a kid, my mom constantly had to tell me I couldn't sit with one knee up at the dinner table. She can testify I did this before there were memes about it.

[–]reluctant_commenter[S] 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Do you think that stereotype is an accurate one, then?

The only connection I can think of that would make sense is that there are disproportionately high rates of "neurodiverse" diagnoses among LGB people, for example, ADHD (and I believe autism spectrum disorder as well), and subclinical levels of these disorders might manifest in behavior that "neurotypical" people might think is unusual. Otherwise, I can't help but wonder if it is just a trendy belief among teens that has no basis in reality, such as the "asexuals like garlic bread" meme. (Not to dismiss your personal experience, I mean at the population level)

[–]HelloMomo 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

I can't speak to why it's the case, nor what percentage of the population it's true for or if that's significant. All I can say is that for virtually all other stereotypes, from walking fast to dyed hair, I don't get it remotely. I'm like, "What are you talking about?" But sitting weird? Oh shit, this is a personally callout post now.

But overall, I guess I am willing to entertain the idea that many, if not most, stereotypes have a kernel of truth in them? Like there was a time when I probably would've rejected the idea that gender non-conforming kids are more-likely-than-average to grow up gay because that's a stereotype! But it's also, y'know, demonstrably statically true. So now I'm not nearly so defensive or dismissive about stereotypes in general.

[–]reluctant_commenter[S] 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

All I can say is that for virtually all other stereotypes, from walking fast to dyed hair, I don't get it remotely. I'm like, "What are you talking about?" But sitting weird? Oh shit, this is a personally callout post now.

Yeah I relate to it too, lol. I don't think I do that all the time but I have definitely gotten some weirded-out comments before on how I sit (e.g., sitting with my feet up on a couch, for example). I have ADHD, though, and I have met many straight people who have ADHD who do the exact same thing, which is why I might think it might just be a "neurodiverse" thing and not actually relevant for LGB people who don't have ADHD, for example.

But overall, I guess I am willing to entertain the idea that many, if not most, stereotypes have a kernel of truth in them?

I hear you. That is often (but not always!) the case. Honestly, my problem is not so much with observing stereotypes as with enforcing stereotypes. Because I've seen so many LGBTQ-identified people, both online and offline, not only observe a stereotype but then assume that they should act like the stereotype in order to be "more gay"! Which makes no sense.

[–]HelloMomo 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I have definitely gotten some weirded-out comments before on how I sit (e.g., sitting with my feet up on a couch, for example). I have ADHD, though, and I have met many straight people who have ADHD who do the exact same thing,

Wait, I just remembered something! So I was part of this computer programming boot-camp program for a year. It was a program that self-selected for ADHD-ish people; basically, people who can hyper-focus. And I did notice that several of my straight male friends there did it too.

[–]reluctant_commenter[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

More data! Okay, I'm gonna do some digging and maybe see if there's anything mentioned about this in the ADHD research literature :)

That sounds like a pretty fun boot camp, by the way.

[–]Elvira95Viva la figa 5 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 0 fun6 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Gender non comforminity and homosexuality are highly related and that's biological . But pushing stereotypes and generalization like that, even if they represents a significant part of population, it's just dumb and does lead to conforminity, like kids believing they need to behave a certain way in order to feel valid gays

Anyway, I like to sit with my legs crossed. So quite not masculine at all lol