You NEED to protect yourself! I’m old enough to be your mother, and there are few things I hate more than seeing or hearing about young women dealing with stalkers. Especially in this day and age, when indulging stalkers, if they’re trans, is considered to be defending their “human rights” or some kind of similar, dangerous bullshit.

The very first thing you need to do is get it out of your head that lodging a complaint about him will be ineffective because your school is full-on TRA. Fuck. That. Shit. Lodge a complaint! I can’t stress this enough. You may get blowback if you do, but if you don’t then this man can potentially harm you, or worse, and you won’t have any defense against it because you “never complained”. Seriously. This is how the system works, no matter whether you’re a lesbian, bisexual or straight woman. If you’re female, them’s the breaks. I have dealt with and taken classes, trainings on stalking and abuse, been in support groups for these issues, and I’m just telling you what I learned.

Second, DOCUMENT everything! Can’t stress this enough. Just write down, as briefly or in detail as you like or feel: date, time (doesn’t have to be to-the-minute)/time of day, location, and most importantly, how his actions and words made you feel. If it all dies down and he leaves you alone, then you can just put it away, but if not you have an invaluable resource!

Third, file a complaint. If not with your school, with your local police office. Explain what’s happening. Don’t feel scared to mention that he’s trans. Join the LGB Alliance. Ask around for good resources for what to do. This will establish the seriousness of your concerns. I know it sucks to jump through so many hoops to show that you’re scared of him, but again, this is sadly how it is for women everywhere.

Fourth, take a self-defense class. SOOOOO important for dealing with this kind of thing, whether from a trans stalker or any kind of stalker.

One other thing to keep in mind: he may very well tire of stalking you and turn his attention to some other girl. If she’s not firm in her boundaries as you are, she could get badly hurt, or worse. This person’s creepiness needs to be well-known, or he may get away with doing this to any number of women. If that happens, which I think is more likely than not, it will be good to have network of women who can speak out against him as there’s strength in numbers.

Good luck, and please keep us updated!