How do I tell my gay friend dating a transman that he is bisexual?

submitted by Smolders1Cock is god's greatest gift. from self.LGBDropTheT

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[–]reluctant_commenter 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Oh. Sounds like you are talking about people who just tried it and realized they didn't like it, but maybe are in denial about being straight and/or want to acknowledge their past experiences?

and basically differentiates them from straights/gays who never touched or thought about the opposite/same sex, but also bisexuals who had actual attraction of both sexes.

I think most people use the words "homoflexible/heteroflexible" in a very different way than you, then. Usually I hear it applied to people who are like a 5.5 or a 1.5 (so to speak) on the Kinsey scale, i.e. bisexuals at the extreme of either end, who are attracted to both sexes but one of their directions of attraction just very rarely happens. (I don't really have an opinion on how those terms should be used, I'm just observing.)

Also, now that I think about it... OP never stated if his friend was actually attracted to this transman. For all we know, he could've been pressured into it to seem "woke."

Yeah, that's true.

[–]BiHorror 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Oh. Sounds like you are talking about people who just tried it and realized they didn't like it, but maybe are in denial about being straight and/or want to acknowledge their past experiences

Yeah, I seen most of them like that. With only a few being so keen on the "attraction" part. I wonder if these people are also apart of the group of straights who want to be apart of LGB (not sure about homoflexible).

I think most people use the words "homoflexible/heteroflexible" in a very different way than you, then. Usually I hear it applied to people who are like a 5.5 or a 1.5 (so to speak) on the Kinsey scale, i.e. bisexuals at the extreme of either end, who are attracted to both sexes but one of their directions of attraction just very rarely happens. (I don't really have an opinion on how those terms should be used, I'm just observing.)

I've seen and used it in both ways. It's just that when I see the people who do use it, it's less of those who would be 5.5 or 1.5. Like, while I don't want bisexuality to be seen as 50/50 but I just find it odd to classify "bisexual but rarely rarely happens" as bisexual. I find that most of these people who are like that just have a "attraction" that goes in and out quick. Similar to how some lesbians/gay men (or straights) think they might be "attracted" to the opposite but that super disappears.

Yeah, that's true.

Yeah, I'm just starting to find it annoying that people will automatically go to "bisexual" when trans people are involved when there could be multiple other reasons.

[–]reluctant_commenter 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I find that most of these people who are like that just have a "attraction" that goes in and out quick. Similar to how some lesbians/gay men (or straights) think they might be "attracted" to the opposite but that super disappears.

Oh, gotcha. Like a sort of fleeting "oh I recognize that that person is attractive enough that I notice that they are, but I'm not actually into them".

Yeah, I'm just starting to find it annoying that people will automatically go to "bisexual" when trans people are involved when there could be multiple other reasons.

Totally agree. I try to call it out when I see it. It is just not grounded in reality. There used to be a couple asshole users who would really go off on bisexuals a few months ago, but I actually haven't seen them do it recently, so maybe they are being censored now.