Is anybody on this sub a straight ally or questioning?

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[–]Tikiri 33 insightful - 4 fun33 insightful - 3 fun34 insightful - 4 fun -  (5 children)

Straight ally here!👋🏽 I lurked a lot in both r/GC and r/lgbdropthet before they got banned. I grew up with lgb friends and neighbors both here in the U.S. and in my native country, and just never thought there was anything “wrong” with them, even though even here in the U.S. homosexuality/bisexuality were deemed “deviant”, “abnormal” etc. (b.t.w. I’m old!😂). In my native country homosexuality is still illegal.

I was a LibFem for a bit and dabbled in the t.w.a.w. nonsense accordingly ... until I actually read some books written by both FtM and MtF writers, and the aggressive, almost violent narcissism on display shook me to the core. And especially MtFs because, well, as a straight woman I can clock a straight man when I see one.🤷🏻‍♀️ And the way they harass lesbians is sickening.

I’m an ally because I’m against straight people, whether or not they’re “trans”, perpetrating violence against gay and bi people, simple as that. And make no mistake, it IS violence, whether it’s mental, emotional, physical, psychological, or whatever form it takes.

[–]reluctant_commenter 12 insightful - 1 fun12 insightful - 0 fun13 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

until I actually read some books written by both FtM and MtF writers, and the aggressive, almost violent narcissism on display shook me to the core.

What books? I'm trying to collect a list of quotes from trans rights activists, to show friends skeptical about the harm done by homophobic trans people.

And especially MtFs because, well, as a straight woman I can clock a straight man when I see one.🤷🏻‍♀️ And the way they harass lesbians is sickening.

Thanks for the support, dude, much appreciated. It IS sickening. I've contemplated coming out of the closet but have hesitated to do so, in part because I don't want to be make myself a target for people in the "queer community" who believe women who don't want dick are bigots or ought to be ashamed of themselves. I'm still getting over shame about being gay that I got from my homophobic conservative relatives... now we've got liberal homophobia as well, lol.

[–]Tikiri 8 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 0 fun9 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Okay, I have to say something to you that may not be my place to say but ... I’ll say it anyway: DON’T let these freaks scare you into staying in the closet, if what you really want is to come out. Let that be YOUR call to do if and when YOU want, not letting these thugs dictate your life. They already dictate far too many of our laws, beliefs and, most of all, our freedoms.

I mean, as a single mom trying to change careers while living in the Wokest Place on Earth, I’m very “stealth” in my opinions on this whole TRA ideology and the abuse they dish out with no consequences, so I’m probably not one to talk about not letting them dictate my life, but it just pains me so much to see a gay person do anything similar. Growing up in the ‘70s-‘80s, first in a super conservative third world country and then in the U.S. where I witnessed SO much suffering among closeted people (in my native country they’re still forced to do that, for the most part), it makes me incredibly sad. Not to mention angry, because I really thought for a minute that we were done with this b.s. in the West!

Ugh. Sorry for the rant. But ... ⚡️I’m sending you strength and power vibes, friend!⚡️

[–]reluctant_commenter 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Hey, thanks for sharing your thoughts and support, I appreciate it. No need to apologize... it's an important topic and it's helpful to hear from your perspective, which IS pretty unique.

TRAs do dictate a lot of areas of our lives now, at least here in the U.S. I think part of my hesitance comes also from negative feelings about my sexual orientation. If I'm going to come out, I need to know that I can FULLY back myself up if I get verbally attacked by the sort of self-righteous gender ideology adherent that I'm surrounded with (I also live in a TRA-heavy area). And, I'm just not quite there yet. I guess it'll just take some time; I already feel WAY different towards myself than even at the beginning of this year, so there's progress.

Anyway, thanks for the encouragenent. And for the good vibes. :) :) Right back atcha.

[–]Tikiri 7 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 0 fun8 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Oh, and forgot to add: the books were by one S. Bear Bergman (sp?) who’s FtM, and then Sissy by Jacob Tobia, and I’m Afraid of Men by Vivek Shraya, among others. Some I read a while back, so I forget the titles. B.t.w., “Vivek” is MtF but has conveniently kept his very masculine first name.🙄

[–]reluctant_commenter 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Thanks!! Will take a look :)