Just a gay guy tired of being told what I'm allowed to believe.

submitted by anarchy753 from self.Introductions

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[–]Shockwave 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Here here to everything except the asexuality part. I have been sexually assaulted for being asexual, and told "oh, you'll find someone someday" and "you just haven't experienced it yet so you don't know," etcetera by men and women alike (even rape victims themselves, the fuck). True asexuals, the ones who have near zero libido, suffer the shame of not being driven to have sex, in a sex-filled world. It's even worse that the other siblings are gay and so I'm the only one with even a chance of producing legitimate offspring from my combination of parents (thus passing down the bloodline). I will admit that the LGBT community has destroyed the notion of what asexuality means just like the Ts have destroyed what it means for you to be a gay man or how you think or act.

Aside from that, I definitely hear you. Filtering by race is so important. I'm interested in Japanese only; I can only imagine being forced to sift through the 90% of other men as infuriating (I look for relationship rather than to bang). That would be time to move to a different platform! One that is not so woke. Discrimination is what leads humans to procreate with the humans they desire. Lack of discrimination would be madness. Discrimination in mates is found in just about every living species on this planet.

[–]not-a-neckbeard 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

True asexuals, the ones who have near zero libido, suffer the shame of not being driven to have sex, in a sex-filled world.

Shame is an unpleasant self-conscious emotion typically associated with a negative evaluation of the self; withdrawal motivations; and feelings of distress, exposure, mistrust, powerlessness, and worthlessness. Look here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shame

Sounds like you're basing your own self worth on what you think society wants, rather than deciding your own worth for yourself.

[–]Shockwave 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You're right, I am. I do feel shame in that I can't perform in the same way that others can. I want to be able to please my partner (when I eventually get one) as well as to bear children but the act of sex is such a non-interest to me that I feel I'll only fail my partner if I end up in a relationship. I read all over that sex is integral to the health of a romantic relationship (whether or not that's true, IDK). I don't want me to be the reason my partner is so unhappy, because I can't provide something that nearly every other person on this earth can.