Respectful Requests: Please no personal attacks! Attack the argument, not the poster. Also, request for male posters to please identify themselves as male.

submitted by BEB from self.GenderCritical

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[–]MarkTwainiac 10 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

Making a sub rule where all males have to identify their sex before being permitted to post gets a definite "NO" vote from me.

I also think your portrayal of what happened on the other thread is extremely inaccurate.

[–]BEB[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Did you read the thread?

I was called "bigoted" in response to my throwaway line (that was not actually offensive) about the conservative women's group I had just finished talking to, who I was working with to plan a rally against the US Equality Act.

And then the poster attacked again - he said I had used the term "pond scum" or something when I had done no such thing.

Everything I said in that thread I stand by and I would invite people to read the thread and note the time stamps.

And I'm not demanding anything, I said "Respectful Request" because, had I known that the poster was male, I would have walked away from the conversation.

I have too much to do trying to raise awareness of a vote NEXT WEEK on the US Equality Act to waste my time arguing with a man who completely misrepresented my words, attacked me and wanted to talk about his mother IN THE UK and her ABORTION activism, when the thread was specifically about the AMERICAN Equality Act.

Anyway, I invite everyone to read the original thread - just scroll down a little and judge for yourself.

And now I'm off to work with CONSERVATIVE women in an attempt to stop the atrocity called the (AMERICAN) Equality Act. I hope everyone who can, will do whatever they can too.

Be best!

[–]WildApples 10 insightful - 2 fun10 insightful - 1 fun11 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I just read the exchange and, while he was clearly critical of a part of your message, I would not call it an attack just as I would not call the line you wrote about conservative women bigoted. He reasonably explained why he disagreed with your characterization of conservative women, and I found his explanation rather enlightening because it was not really about you so much as about the way feminist spaces can unfortunately become echo chambers.

I do not know many conservatives, so I'll admit to having what might be a caricature view of conservative women as being anti-choice and regressive about female roles. That same perception has played out in a lot of feminist spaces, and I've seen feminists argue against partnering with conservative women on GC issues for that reason. He is highlighting that in this way, we can be our own enemy.

Clearly, that is not you, but I can imagine it is probably pretty isolating to identify as conservative in spaces like this, and I can see why he had a lot of pent-up frustration that you became the unfortunate target of. At the end of the day, I do not think his criticism was as much about you as it was about all of us and our need to see beyond our potentially myopic viewpoints.

And since, as you said, it was a throwaway line anyway, maybe accept the criticism and acknowledge that all conservative women do not believe women should only be wives and mothers or disregard it because ultimately it does not matter to your main point that we all need to organize against the Equality Act. It seems like you and he have more in common that not. You both want women of all political stripes to come together to combat TRA attacks on women. I hope you two can overcome your differences and fight the good fight in a united front.

Either way, I appreciate you and your efforts to keep us mobilized! You've motivated me to start drafting letters to my members of Congress. :-)

[–]Rationalmind 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Agree, good insight.