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[–]MezozoicGay 12 insightful - 4 fun12 insightful - 3 fun13 insightful - 4 fun -  (5 children)

For man being romantic and fully loving (and supporting) someone is considered as "weakness" in patriarchic society, and that role is "for mothers and wives". There even slur for such men - "henpecked". So men can be wanting to love, but they taught to not. Fear of being rejected by society can move some men to violence (I know at least one example).

At least I can openly support and love women as friends (not sure if it is legit phrasing in English, but in our language there 3 different words for "love" and one of them has meaning of very deep friendship - I mean that last one) and don't afraid of that slur, because I already marked by other, even worse crime - of being a gay man.

[–]Fuzz 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (4 children)

That's not what that word means, henpecked is a man with a controlling female partner, such that he is afraid even to contradict her, possibly implying verbal abuse. It doesn't have anything to do with being romantic.

[–]MezozoicGay 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Here it is does mean this and that for sure. When a man is canceling fishing with friends because his wife got sick or when man is making romantic gifts, he is almost always called henpecked - either jockingly or seriously.

[–][deleted] 9 insightful - 1 fun9 insightful - 0 fun10 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

You have no idea how many times my husband has been called whipped because I expected him to do his fair share of the household chores. Henpecked is used to shame men who actually want gender equality. They think it’s abusive for a wife to expect men to pick up after themselves.

[–]Fuzz 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

There's a similar expression in Ukrainian, or do Ukrainians commonly use 'henpecked' in English? I guess I've seen it used ironically, as in "oh haha you are spending time with your wife on your anniversary, how henpecked, have fun", but it seems pretty rude to joke that way about a sick partner.

[–]MezozoicGay 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yes, it is similar expression, but it has more wide meaning in spoken language. To which I am refering to.

And I was called by that as well, even thought I am gay man with gay partner. And I am still called henpecked for supporting women I know and for not being "manly enough".