My cousin is now a Transbian TIM. (X-post from s/itsafetish)

submitted by TrotRadFemAlly from (self.GenderCritical)

So it turns a cousin of mine is now a transbian TIM. I found this out when I decided to check his Instagram (I wanted to see how he was doing during the ongoing outbreak) and saw that he had posts like "I just want everyone to know that I'm a transbian, have a nice day!" and "Trans Lesbians (like me) are real lesbians. Deal with it.😎" I already know he's quite a weeb-y guy and that he and his friends would "joke" about having hentai addictions (which is why I suspect he has animesickness and pornsickness). His parents are typical libfems and are allowing to him cross-dress and said that they would allow him to go on HRT. I don't know what to do and I'm scared of how he could damage himself mentally & physically. What should I do?

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[–]jet199 32 insightful - 2 fun32 insightful - 1 fun33 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

If you have the ability just tell him straight it's a fetish. Then carry on as normal without changing how you treat him.

Likely no one is talking to him honestly so he will need that. He won't like it but he'll need it. And if you don't change you behaviour towards him he can't honestly accuse you of being hateful. He still will, but he'll know its not true.

People really have to get out of addictions and mental health problems by themselves. You can be their with the info but you can't think for them.

[–]Anoki 16 insightful - 2 fun16 insightful - 1 fun17 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

Are you close , if that’s the case try to make him see the truth , but don’t hope too much I have a crossdressing ex who thinks he is gender fluid and did not listen , and if you are not close to him leave him be it will be better for you

[–]TrotRadFemAlly[S] 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (2 children)

I live sort of close

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 2 fun2 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

I wouldn't give away identifying details here – women were doxxed over at the other site. Or if you do, change the details enough to convey the meaning, but throw people off.

[–]TrotRadFemAlly[S] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

changed comment to remove that detail

[–]momiji 7 insightful - 2 fun7 insightful - 1 fun8 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

How old is he?

[–]TrotRadFemAlly[S] 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

17

[–]Elysian 5 insightful - 2 fun5 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 2 fun -  (3 children)

I am of the firm opinion that there is a huge overlap between trans"bians" and weeaboos.

[–]TrotRadFemAlly[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

Why are transbians so obsessed with anime?

[–]Immortallogic 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

Because the anime convinces them that they can be real women and because it's a cartoon they can dissociate enough to believe it. If they saw a real women, even their unconscious brains would know enough to tell them they could never be like that. But in anime fantasyland they don't have that inconvenience. That's my half baked theory haha.

[–][deleted] 1 insightful - 1 fun1 insightful - 0 fun2 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

anime convinces them that they can be real women

No anime has ever done that because anime are not transsexualism propaganda. It's the same as saying that 'video games make people violent', when what actually happens is violent people being attracted to violent video games. If somebody chooses to follow the trans-cult because of anime... they had serious mental issues to begin with.

If they saw a real women, even their unconscious brains would know enough to tell them they could never be like that. But in anime fantasyland they don't have that inconvenience.

It's the opposite. Nobody in their right senses believes they could be an anime character.

[–]Doobeedoo661 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

Avoid him, he likely suffers from personality flaws that require constant validation from those around him. Consider yourself lucky he’s not an immediate family member under the same roof as you, therefore, avoidable.

Hopefully, he’ll either outgrow autogynephilia or you’ll outgrow the need to help everyone.

[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Hey!

I am still hanging out with a trailing migraine, which means thoughts are sometimes not the best to get out on the screen.

As for your situation, this is tough depending on your family dynamics, and how you want to "be" in your family. Also, someone told me something very profound once (I also have a lot of profound book suggestions, not GC but psych books). Imagine for yourself, trying to change one bad habit. One thing, whatever it may be, and how hard you have to work on that, for yourself. You are in no position to change anyone else. Therapists are also there as a guide. They cannot give life directives, ethically. They do not want to be responsible for life outcomes, especially if something horrific happens.

I like to send peer reviewed literature of AGP, but that is in my own experiences, because I have had ENOUGH. I also have a family member who says he is this.Sigh. I do not talk to this person, and it is an immediate family member. However, I have the means not to rely on, or need my blood relatives. There are 7 billion plus people on the planet. Even though I am someone who is considered loving, and volunteers a lot, I also have learned to express and enforce my own boundaries. This means my emotional boundaries. I am a work in progress, but not only does it mean protecting myself from others, but protecting myself, FROM myself.

You want to help and fix. I get it. Hang in there. I know you are worried and you know what?That is good. It means you have a heart, and compassion. You are not a piece of chite in that department. Congratulations. Not even trying to be snarky here.Having compassion for others is a big deal, and as much as I have anger towards many things, I also have compassion, and that is a healthy sign of holding two opposing views together as existing in the same space. There is a book called ACT (acceptance) for yourself, not for them. You are not responsible for his actions. You can only be responsible for you.

Decide which hill you want to hang your ovaries on, and do that.

It is difficult, because it is hard to accept one's own truth instead of aiming for membership.

I strive so hard lately to accept my truth over membership. It is a b!tch sometimes to resolve those feelings, because here you are , in GC, posting this, with compassion.

Take care of you first and foremost. You are no help to others if you do not do that.

Distance yourself if need be.

We all must walk our own paths.

Be extra nice to yourself, do not judge your feelings, accept you are having them.

I am so sorry you are having to navigate this, My immediate family member was also diagnosed with some major medical illness, so he cannot go through any kind of "transition."

Hang in there.

[–]Finnegan7921 2 insightful - 3 fun2 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 3 fun -  (0 children)

Not gonna lie, when quickly scanning the page, I read "Transbian TIM" as "Transylvanian TIM" and thought, "this is going to be interesting."

[–]LeyMio 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

To be honest, I would only suggest avoiding him and his family at all cost. TIMs are mentally violent, and usually obsessed with the imagination of raping and murdering women. Because he is a teenager, he would not even take full legal responsibility for his action. His parents are obviously irresponsible people and can not be trusted either.

[–]yishengqingwa666 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Cut him off. Gray rock.