What are your thoughts on bisexual terminology?

submitted by PeakingPeachEater from self.Bisexuals

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[–]clitoriana 10 insightful - 1 fun10 insightful - 0 fun11 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

TBH I think stag and doe are ridiculous and gross. We're not animals... and it's literally a direct copy of butch/femme. I'd be surprised if anyone outside of tumblr uses it. I have mixed feelings about us calling ourselves butch/femme but it's like, if you want another gender identity that badly then use the originals. Stag/doe is just corny. 😂

However, I'm a hypocrite because I think tomcat sounds cute. I have never used it, though, and never will, because it sounds juvenile and I'm approaching 30. And again, I don't think anyone other than kids on the internet use it.

I am a female-exclusive bisexual. I'm beginning to feel uncomfortable with the FEBFEM label though. I just want to call myself bi & leave it at that. I'm a feminist separatist but still proud of being bisexual. I like that it exists because it makes it easier to connect with other bi women like me. But I also feel conflicted about it, like it's becoming yet another unnecessary micro-label.

I don't even know what to say about "bi lesbians," god what a joke! I think some of them are bi women who would still happily date men (even if the men don't identify as men) or self-hating lesbians that date "cis" women and female nonbinary-identified women. It's so incredibly stupid.

[–]PeakingPeachEater[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Yeah, I feel you on the stag/doe. Some people change it to buck/stag/doe and replace the tomcat to = stag. But lol it seems meaningless, and I agree it's stilly with being named after animals.

I don't really know the history behind butch/femme but I've referred to myself as a "butch" because that's an easy word for others to understand...if not butch, I would just say masculine...style? Not sure lol. I'm a bit more inbetween nowadays(androgynous).

Maybe we don't even need terms equivalent like "butch" and "femme". It might be best to just say masculine/androgynous/feminine since those are pre-existing words that don't need a lot of explanation(in case someone has NO friggin clue what "butch" and "femme" mean, most straight people probably don't know...).

Also, can I just say how I hate the terms "top, verse, bottom"? It just seems silly with this retarded "top-energy/bottom-energy" crap. Some gals try to make it a personality trait when all it is is bedroom talk and not necessary for others to know about.

Also, I'm not the biggest fan of the term "tomboy" either..."{...} because it implies that a girl (or woman, for that matter) who does not conform to girl-coded cultural stereotypes is not only not really a girl, but somehow a kind of a boy. It tells girls (and boys, and women, and men) that there is a right way of being a girl, and a wrong way of being a girl, and if you’re the ‘wrong’ kind of girl, then actually you’re more of a boy. That’s messed up, when you think about it."

I used to get called a "tomboy" as a code word for "lesbian" or "weird" and get bullied for it too...

I am a female-exclusive bisexual. I'm beginning to feel uncomfortable with the FEBFEM label though. I just want to call myself bi & leave it at that. I'm a feminist separatist but still proud of being bisexual. I like that it exists because it makes it easier to connect with other bi women like me. But I also feel conflicted about it, like it's becoming yet another unnecessary micro-label.

I see what you mean. It gets to the point that TOO many labels become pointless/unnecessary. It reminds me of the term "asexual" and how it keeps dwindling to "demisexual" to "biromantic" and etc etc. When they could just shut up and leave it at "asexual" but I even feel a bit conflicted about that term---I tried to label myself as a one in my teen years at one point lol. I think it should be used for those who are legitamently NOT attracted to ANYONE. If they go by "homo/hetero/biromantic" sub category they might as well say they are a voluntary homo/hetero/bisexual celibate...

My guess on the silly "bi lesbian" and "bi gay" thing is that they are using it the same as "female exclusive/male exclusive bisexual" but did a terrible job at picking a new term to describe what they want to say...or they're just full of shit and to be special with their terminology.

or self-hating lesbians that date "cis" women and female nonbinary-identified women. It's so incredibly stupid.

Yeah, I have NO idea what the hell is the point of the term "non-binary". If anything, instead of them trying to be sexless, they could've turnt it into a cooler way of saying "gender non-conforming". But nope, non-binary is being sexless or whatever genderspecial they claim to be.

However, overall, I think labels can be useful in terms of finding a community of like-minded individuals but(ex. Saying "I'm bisexual" instead of "I'm attracted to both sexes")...some terms are highly unnecessary like the ones we discussed lol. Just plain and simply terrible.