Do the vegans know about the honey thing?

I've never met one that didn't know about honey, although they don't always realize sugar isn't necessarily okay.

I bought a jar of honey, and put it in a cool dark place so it can ferment. It still looks the same. It's taking forever.

It'll never ferment as is, the high sugar content and natural antibiotic properties of honey (it actually produces hydrogen peroxide) make it an excellent preservative. If you've ever heard of enemy leaders in olden times being decapitated and their heads placed in a barrel of honey, that's to preserve it so that it can make the long trip back to be identified.

You'll need to dilute it with water and add yeast.