this post was submitted on 10 Sep 2021

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Hurt deeply by "bisexual" friend

submitted 2 years ago by [deleted] from self.Lesbians

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[–]totallyathrowaway87 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun - 2 years ago* (0 children)

It may be hard, but you really shouldn't be comparing yourself to a 60 year old man. Its definitely strange, but this is why she's bi and you're not.

In addition just because she's bi doesn't mean she's equally attracted to women and men. I think it's easy to overlook this when you're only attracted to one sex.

I wouldnt group bi women together, you should be asking them how into women they are in the first place. In my experience most bi women are more into men than women, into both equally is a minority but not uncommon, and into women more is about as rare as actually being a lesbian.

There's a lot of potential to get burned if you go into something like that without knowing what you're doing. Its not like they're callous they just aren't what many women seem to expect.

In this case though, from what you say, she's got a lot of red flags by way of attention seeking. The 60 year old man thing feels to me like she wants to be a trophy girlfriend for the attention. It also doesn't seem like she's considered how a lesbian woman might feel.

Honestly it's not easy to learn those warning signs without ample experience... Which is hard to get when it's already so hard to find other lesbians in the first place.

Also as for the 60 year old man thing, I've known plenty of lesbian couples with 20 to 30 year age differences. Again some women are legitimately into that. I'd probably be ok with 10 to 15 without any second thoughts. What you think about it isn't what others think about it.