[spoilers] Below Her Mouth (2016) — Film of The Week

submitted by piylot from self.Lesbians

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[–][deleted] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (5 children)

Aww, thanks.

I think we're more or less in agreement on DoB - I just saw the younger, submissive one as the true dominant partner in the relationship as she controlled the power dynamics and wielded the threat of looking outside the relationship to fulfill her needs.

But I didn't really see it as all that lighthearted though. It is a funny movie, but by the end - even though they're shown burning the scripts and getting rid of the trunk - the "dom" is back in the wig and about to re-enact the same scenario we saw at the beginning and throughout the movie, re-entering the whole cycle that made her so miserable in the first place. So to me the whole thing was really horrible and sad and not a happy ending at all. And if you extrapolate the bdsm roles to just regular roles we play in relationships in order to please our partners, it shows how you can sacrifice your happiness and lose your sense of self when the person who is your entire world desires different things than you do. I've never been in a serious relationship, so this hit on a lot of very specific fears of mine - having to change for someone else, having a life that revolves around another person, having to forgo personal boundaries and preferences in order to please someone, etc.

I've seen people refer to it as a "beautiful love story", so maybe it's just me, but it's like they watched a different movie than I did. To me it's a personal nightmare.

[–]Innisfree 6 insightful - 2 fun6 insightful - 1 fun7 insightful - 2 fun -  (4 children)

Brill reading. Don't know how i retrospectively managed to erase the sad ending from my mind. I suppose i focused too much on the irony of the whole situation. Specifically, that the one who was the sub in the roleplay was, like you say, the one who controlled the relationship dynamics. And her manipulative side - scary stuff!

And if you extrapolate the bdsm roles to just regular roles we play in relationships in order to please our partners, it shows how you can sacrifice your happiness and lose your sense of self when the person who is your entire world desires different things than you do.

That's a great way to summarise the message of the movie. I appreciate it even more now. Because at the time it also rung some bells for me and mapped out a minefield for future relationships. After watching it i remember being less willing to redraw my boundaries. Useful. Perhaps a rewatch is in order it's been 6 years already, wow. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! Highly recommend to anyone in a new relationship or just out of one because - see pixel's post.

Edit: missed a word

[–][deleted] 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (3 children)

Thanks! I just saw it for the first time recently, after putting it off for a long time (I thought the bdsm elements were going to be considerably more explicit). After seeing In Fabric (not as good, but worth seeing) in the theater, I took the plunge.

It's possible people are reading the ending as a compromise between the pair, but Cynthia, the dom, looks so sad while fixing her wig and like she doesn't recognize herself in the mirror. Coupled with the movie ending where it begins, I read it as an unhealthy cycle. If you see it again, let me know what your thoughts are. I had thought about recommending it in one of the film threads, but I think it's hard to find on streaming and I wasn't sure how a male directed, weirdo bdsm lesbian movie that mimics 70s sexploitation would fly. I loved it though.

[–]Innisfree 4 insightful - 2 fun4 insightful - 1 fun5 insightful - 2 fun -  (0 children)

It's certainly unhealthy. But I enjoyed the complexity with which the dynamic was portrayed. It's sparse on dialogue and evocative - good combo. I'll rewatch though and get back with my pensées :)

[–]Innisfree 3 insightful - 2 fun3 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 2 fun -  (1 child)

Re-watched and re-appreciated. Besides again agreeing with your reading, all i can say is i re-appreciated Sidse's acting and the fact that her character had to stay so well hydrated throughout the film Lol

On a side note. Peter Strickland, the writer and director, said sth that i found to be true while watching: he tried to make a tender film about relationship dynamics, rather than a specific practice (your reading, spot on). He tried not condemning the characters, but also look with humour and empathy at some of the excesses - "the things we do for love".

[–][deleted] 2 insightful - 1 fun2 insightful - 0 fun3 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

I'm glad it held up to a second viewing. Sidse Babett Knudsen is really incredible in it, as the cracks begin to show in their relationship, you can really tell what she's thinking and feeling at every turn. And yeah, realizing why she kept drinking all that water was an LOL moment for me.

I think this is the best of the Strickland movies I've seen by a long shot, but Berberian Sound Studio and In Fabric had a lot going for them as well.