I hate my GF's best friend

Buckskin_Suckerpunch · 2020-09-12T02:19:59+00:00

I vote leave the girlfriend out of it and call her little bestie out. I’m willing to bet she will back down. Some of the dumbest people I have ever met have PhD’s. Example, my uncle who’s a really good oncologist got the tips of his fingers cut off by a chain saw he was using and I still can’t figure out how that happened. Or my friend, who’s a lawyer, I had to explain how eBay scams work to after she got screwed. So don’t let her hold her PhD, that she’ll be paying off for the next 30 years, over your head.

MessyChocolate · 2020-09-12T10:19:34+00:00

My first thought was that the gf needs to grow a pair of ovaries. She is not in the middle, she made a decision to involve both of you in her life. If she is allowing the friend to mistreat you then she is not a good girlfriend. The two of you do not have to like each other but be civil at least. Unless the gf puts her foot down and tells the friend to mind her manners around you nothing is going to change.

I've been "in the middle". My ex-girlfriend did not like my friends and my closest friend did not like my gf. It was uncomfortable for me, but in the end I was responsible for the situation. I made it clear that they did not have to be best friends, but they had to behave like adults around each other otherwise I would cut them both out of my life.

sickofit · 2020-09-12T15:00:02+00:00

I think she probably does have feelings for your gf because that's weird. But I think more than that, you need to talk to your girlfriend. The reason why her friend is acting like that doesn't matter. Simply... she should be standing up for you. Your girlfriend should be the first one to say "hey, shut up, that's the girl i love and you are not going to insult her in my house. treat her with respect or leave." Why isn't she doing that? To me, that's the real issue.

StrictlyDykley · 2020-09-12T01:00:48+00:00

You should talk to her best friend about it and try to clear it up. It can’t be easy for your gf to be in the middle. Since she won’t accept your friend requests etc online, you should really invite her somewhere and try your best not to accuse her of anything. You both care about someone and that’s what is causing this problem. It should be something you can solve because you’re actually on the same side. Your gfs past choices are not about you, and you shouldn’t be suffering for how the others treated her. It’s unfair and misplaced judgement on you from her best friend, and is going to hurt your gf in the end.

carrotcake · 2020-09-12T05:11:12+00:00

Some parts of this just hit too close home. In my case the best friend was doing her phd and she was also 30 something and seemed like 15. She was also going through some shit. She was ALWAYS going through some shit that was making her behave like a stubborn child. Honestly? I've been "going through some shit" since my early teens and I've never treated anyone badly because of it. We're all going through shit, that's no excuse to treat badly your best friends girlfriend.

Anyway, the difference is that she pretended to like me, which was even more annoying?? Because I had to see her every fucking time and pretend it wasn't obvious that she didn't want us together. Ugh. She was this protective friend personality too and would do anything to defend her friends even when they were obviously wrong. People like this aren't able to like anyone their friend is dating honestly. Their friends are always so perfect in their eyes so nobody is enough. I always feel like I broke up with her because her presence just made social situations unbearable at some point.

I know people are telling you to talk to her and try to work it out but if I'm right (and not just projecting, which I obviously am a little) she'll only fake liking you after that. And if you really don't like her it's for the best that you don't spend time with her. At least I think so. You could just be honest and have the courage I didn't have to tell your gf that her best friend makes you feel bad and uncomfortable and see how she reacts. I think a good solution could be leaving you out of some places where her best friend is. Seeing her less I guess. If you and your girlfriend last long enough, her best friend will have to give in I believe. Or your girlfriend will realize that she's full of shit and won't be her friend anymore lmao

LeaveAmsgAfterBeep · 2020-09-15T17:55:18+00:00

I think your girlfriend has a stalker, not a bestie. At minimum, super codependant friend after your gf’s previous ex maybe? Jealousy issues? If not a crush, I mean I don’t think anyone rational would post that much content about their best friend like pictures of them sleeping and (just?) have that on their social media- especially if she has a husband?!. It’s kinda weird?

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