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[–]SteppenSlut 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (1 child)

I'm so used to being alone and being the mother friend that I often forget about my own needs and wants until the depression hits and I'm sitting there like " oh....that's right....." and get all upset.

I can’t even tell you how much I relate to this. And I only just realized it was happening again like a week ago. I was giving and giving and driving and helping and answering calls and advising people, family and friends when they needed me and taking care of everyone BUT myself. Until I was so tired, drained, and just heavy, I couldn’t even do that anymore. Let alone take care of myself. I laid in bed and that was pretty much it. I kept thinking “how the fuck did I let it get this bad.. AGAIN?”

Honestly, I still feel like crap. But I’m doing things now. I had a really productive day today so that counts. Still wasn’t perfect but it was something.

I guess I’m just trying to let you know and maybe even selfishly on my part (because inside I’m like whoa! Someone like me!) that I see you. The strong bitch who sometimes forgets to take a moment for themselves and seems so solid and fine to others that they might not think to ask how we’re doing, too.

The past few days I’ve basically had to set pride aside and come to the idea that it isn’t shameful to let the people in your life (family and friends) know you’re feeling low. They care, they don’t want you to feel sad.

Maybe consider putting dating on the back burner for now. Sounds like you may be in need of some self care and self love first and foremost, and friends to make you see it through. Coming from a work in progress in the flesh, and I need to take my own advice so I might just slap on a face mask and drink a beer in your honor. Do not hesitate to message me if you’re feeling down. I’ll be your damn friend. Cheers!

[–]midnight305[S] 4 insightful - 1 fun4 insightful - 0 fun5 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

Oh yeah my friends hate seeing me sad and I hate crying infront of people.

A friend the other day felt bad cuz I got sick after we hung out but I told him not to feel bad . He got upset and started crying cuz he blamed himself but I was like " my bodies a stupid cunt. I'll live . "

And oh yeah my moms aggravated with me cuz I up and quit my job and up and went to college but I'm like bad health sick of being a maid I dont want to work a 9to 5 plus job everyday .

What threw me over was when my coworkers started dripping like flies and I saw my own health declining where I decided " not going to fucking die on the floor. " and left.

Yeah it sucks you forget about yourself then when you look in the mirror your like " man I look like I do drugs " because your so run down n tired.

And I kinda want to do both. I bern working on me for awhile. Like I quit my job n started going to college and plan on making a career out of art. I'm hoping to learn more skills like furniture making or glass blowing.

And away thanks you can message me any time. I love making new friends. I'm except for class to start because of it. But it might all be virtual again which sucks....damn vivid pissing me off among other things .