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[–]WildwoodFlower 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (4 children)

Ten years ago, I almost went back to an old boyfriend from high school who contacted me via Facebook. I wasn't interested in sleeping with him. I wasn't even interested in sleeping with him back in the day. But I was at a very low point in my life. The Great Recession had kicked me in the ass. I had been ill with H1N1, followed by the worst stomach flu ever, followed by a bad cold. My weight was down to about 90 pounds. I looked and felt horrible, made worse by the fact that I was well aware that I needed to see a doctor, but couldn't afford it. So when this old flame started hanging around my FB page and then expressed an interest in giving it another go, I was very tempted. This was the only positive attention I was getting from anyone, anywhere. It felt good to know that someone wanted me, even if it was the guy who treated me like crap in the 80s. I also liked the idea of having someone to go out and have fun with. I wanted something else in my life besides being broke and sick. Sure, I would have preferred to have my dream woman show up and sweep me off my feet and carry me off into the sunset, but I knew that wasn't going to happen. I figured I'd better take what I could actually get instead of looking for someone I would probably never find.

I didn't end up going out with that guy. But I can understand how a lesbian in a similar low point in life could decide to go down that path. People do get lonely and desperate.

[–][deleted]  (3 children)

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    [–]WildwoodFlower 6 insightful - 1 fun6 insightful - 0 fun7 insightful - 1 fun -  (2 children)

    For me, it wasn't about sex. I had no sex drive at that time because I'd been so sick. I was probably also clinically depressed, although I'll never know for sure because I could not afford medical care then. I just wanted someone to talk to, someone who would take me places. This guy and I had a lot of similar interests when we were young (especially our taste in music), so I was remembering what that felt like. The idea of having that kind of connection with somebody appealed to me. My other friends had problems of their own, so I wasn't seeing them much. Some of my family members were going through an even worse recession experience, so I wasn't getting much support from anyone on that front. There was no "room" for my problems in my family at that time.

    I think what I really wanted back then was just an escape from it all, and this guy was offering me that.

    [–][deleted]  (1 child)

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      [–]WildwoodFlower 3 insightful - 1 fun3 insightful - 0 fun4 insightful - 1 fun -  (0 children)

      I'm glad I didn't go through with it, too. He stopped posting on FB about six months after he asked me out. I later heard through the grapevine that he was an alcoholic and had gone off on a bender.

      I am doing better now, thanks. My love life is still weird, but this time it's because of a "straight" woman. Like the aforementioned male, she is a genius when it comes to knowing how to push my buttons and mess with my head.